Marvel Across Time
by TheOtherAvenger
Summary: Two best friends are on a college trip in New York City when they are suddenly cast back into 1940's New York City with no apparent way home. They run into another pair of best friends and find themselves involved in the war and eventually with Captain America and his team. But as things start to wrong, the girls wonder if they will ever get home.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone! This story is about my OC and her best friend getting dragged back in time from current times into the 1940's. This is being cowritten with my good friend WaterGirl15, who has a similar story called Captain America Across Time. However, there are some changes and this is written in my OC's POV. Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own any Marvel characters**

 **Warnings: Some sexual content and language**

"No, you shouldn't get back together with him!" I exclaim, walking alongside my best friend, Gabi, through the streets of New York. We are here on a college trip to experience the culture or something like that. It was a pretty interesting. We got to see a broadway show the night before.

"Why not?" Gabi asks, "He said he was sorry and that it was a mistake."

"He's a royal jerkwad! He doesn't deserve a second chance. Plus I'm pretty sure you can't call sleeping with someone's best friend a mistake."

"Well...I figure it was Marianna's fault."

"You'll find someone much better," I say. We are in the back of the crowd, several feet behind the rest of the students.

"Maybe you are right, he has put me through so much," Gabi sighs, "Why do I do this to myself?"

"I wish I knew. You will have to look though. It's not like soulmates magically appear," I say, "I've only been in one real relationship and it sucked."

"I'm sorry, even though I have had many Ben was my first real relationship."

Suddenly there was a bright blue and white light. It grew brighter and brighter until I was forced to shut my eyes to avoid being blinded. Then, the noise from the city and all the people seems to fade almost completely.

When I open my eyes again curiously, I am definitely not where I was before. There were tall buildings, but not as many lights and hardly any people. Plus all the roads were almost empty. There were hardly any cabs or cars.

"What the? Where are we?" I ask, looking around incredulously.

"I have no idea," Gabi answers, "Looks like 1940's New York City."

"Gabi, this is not one of your old novels. We can't be in the 1940's because time travel doesn't exist," I state.

"I know that, maybe they blinded us and brought us to a movie set or something."

"Except we didn't move and we were only blinded for a minute. Look, let's split up and figure this place out. Meet me back here in 2 hours. Text me if you find anything important," I say.

"Right," Gabi looks down, "What the hell!? What happened to my clothes!?" I didn't notice her outfit until that moment.

"Dude, you're wearing a dress," I say, "When did that happen?"

"How should I know! My purse has changed too and my cell is gone!" I go to look in my pockets, but I don't have any. I look down too.

"I'M WEARING A PINK DRESS?" I hate pink with a passion, almost as much as I hate dressed, "I'm going to kill someone."

"Haha! You're in pink, at least it looks good on you. I look like a Latina and if we are in the past, which I doubt, I will get a lot of hate."

"Only she demons wear pink," I say, "Like Umbridge. I want my jeans and graphic t - shirt back."

Gabi laughs at the reference and agrees with me, Gabi head off in one direction and I head in another. We agree to meet up in Time Square in two hours since we both know how to get there.

I go back in the direction we were coming from on our trip. It's winter, so the sun has almost completely set, despite the early time. I wander through the streets of what looks like 1940's New York. I see a group of guys.

"Excuse me?" I ask, hoping I'll get some answers from them. But as they get closer, they seem intoxicated. I start to back away, only to run into a strong body behind me.

"Why hello there Gal," one says clearly drunk.

"Where am I?" I ask him.

"Brooklyn doll."

"This isn't Brooklyn? Where are all the people and all the traffic?" I ask, not comfortable, but at least I'm getting answers.

"What do you mean doll?" the second asks, "We don't get much traffic in these parts."

"This is New York City. There's always traffic," I say, but then decide that I need a better source of information. Clearly these guys are too drunk to give me good answers, "I better go."

"What's the hurry?" the first asks moving to block my path, "why don't we get to know each other better?"

"Please move," I say. I'm pretty sure manners won't help me in this situation, but something is forcing me to be polite.

"Aw come on Gal, it will be fun," the second says.

"No thank you," I say, trying to not panic and also trying to get away, but not having luck with either.

"She said no, so back off," a third voice says.

"And what if we don't?" the first asks.

Suddenly the first guy falls to the ground and a tall dark hair, blue eye man stands over him.

"Get out of here, Now," he says.

The two guys run off from us. I step backwards from the man in front of me in a tan military uniform.

"Please don't hurt me," I say,still backing away "I'll do whatever you want. I promise."

"Don't worry Miss, I do not hurt woman," He says smiling, "My name is Bucky."

"Nice to meet you," I say, "Can you please just tell me where I am?"

"Brooklyn."

"Why does everyone keep saying that?" I ask angrily and kick a wall just a little too hard and curse several times, which was definitely not lady like.

"You must not be from around here," he says getting a little closer, "This is Brooklyn, 1943."

"This isn't funny," I limp backwards, making a wider gap between us, "Who set this up? John, this isn't funny!"

"Ma'am I have no idea what you are talking about. Please let me help you."

"Look, this isn't Brooklyn. I've been to Brooklyn enough times. And also, the year is 2015. So stop with your crap. Game over."

"2015? That isn't for another 70 years or so," Bucky says generally confused.

"How much are John and his crew paying you? How did you the city like this so quickly? And why am I wearing a dress?" I spit the last word, now very angry and the pain in my foot was just adding to it.

"I have no idea what you are talking about, please I am not lying to you."

"This can't be 1940 whatever because that isn't possible. This is 2015 and there is no such thing as time travel. I need to find Gabi." I limp forward, using the wall for support. I try to push past the guy.

"You won't be able to get anywhere with a foot like that, please let me help you."

"Shut up, Mr. Military. I'm not going to fall for your trick and up in some sex dungeon or something. I've read enough romance uniform doesn't even look real."

"Ma'am please," he catches me as I fall, "I am not lying about anything and I have no idea what you mean by sex dungeon."

"Let go of me," I struggle in his strong arms, but he has a strong grip on me.

"No, you are hurt and I will not let you go anywhere alone."

"Just take me to Time Square and leave me there so I can meet my friend."

"Alright."

"What are those walls made out of? Stupid question. It's these damn shoes. They hurt my feet and do nothing to help me walk."

"You kicked a brick wall, what did you expect to happen?"

"I've kicked plenty of walls, Mr. Military. I've never broken my foot before."

Soon we arrive in Time Square and it is not busy like it usually is.

"Where are all the lights and the signs and the people? This doesn't even look like Time Square," I say, "Whatever. Just set me down and go away."

"Don't you need to find your friend? I can help."

"I think I can find her. It's not like there are many people. Please set me down," I tell him nicely.

He nods and sets me down and salutes before walking away. The pain in my foot is rather blinding. I start to get spots in my vision. I take a few steps forward, but my foot can't take the weight. I fall and hit my head on pavement. The world goes dark.

When I come to, I'm in a bed in a plain, sterile white rooms. I'm no longer in the annoying pink dress, but instead a hospital gown. My foot is wrapped up. There is a dull throbbing in my head. I quickly realize there is a person in the chair beside my bed, but my vision is blurry because I don't have my glasses on. I blink a few times and reach my hands out, looking for them.

"Here," a voice says handing me my glasses.

I put them on and the person becomes clear to me, "Who are you?" I ask. I feel like I should recognize the person, but I don't. My memory is a little foggy.

"You are in a hospital, a man found you passed out on the ground and brought you here."

"That wasn't my question," I reply. The man was probably the military guy. He had brought me to Times Square, right? But why?

"My name is Sara O'Mara, I am the head nurse here."

"Your name rhymes," I point out, but she is probably aware of this already, "Am I going to be okay?"

"Yes I know it does," Sara smiles, "You will be fine, the young man will be coming to get you in about an hour."

"But I don't know him," I say, "I need to find someone - I think."

"You have no known family, he said you were looking for a friend and he's gone out to look for her."

"Great. Now, where am I and don't say Brooklyn because I am in no mood for games."

"You are in Manhattan."

"Oh, good. I'm here on a college trip. Do you have a phone I can use? My mother is probably worried sick."

"Of course, there is one in the hall," Sara says getting a wheelchair, "I can help you there."

"Thank you," I say, and look at the chair, trying to figure out how to get into it. It takes a few maneuvers, but I manage alright.

She wheels me into the hall and the hospital looks like something out of a movie, she brings me to a wall phone and hands me the phone.

"What is the number?" Sara asks.

"Umm.. 315-254-0568," I tell her.

She dials the number and nods when she is done. I take the phone as it rings and wait for my mom to pick it up. I really just want to go home at this point.

"Hello?" an older woman's voice answers.

"Mom?" I ask, "Listen, I'm alright. I just got lost on the trip. I'll be fine."

"Catherine? How are you calling? Aren't you suppose to be in London?"

"Not funny, Mom. My name isn't Catherine. I'm in New York. Something weird is going on."

"I'm sorry but my daughter is in London on her honeymoon," she says hanging up.

I frown, "That was strange. Maybe I got the number wrong. Well, someone will find me, right? Can you bring me back to my room?"

"Of course," Sara smiles and brings me back to my room. I lay back down on the bed and wait for the military guy to return.

"Wait, you probably need my name, don't you?" I ask, "Or did you get in from my bag?"

"Oh no, I do need your name ma'am."

"Jessica Arnold," I tell her, then add my address. Hopefully they can sort this all out and get me home. I'm sure Gabi found the rest of our tour group already and was safe.

"Hmm...I didn't think they had that many homes in Syracuse," Sara says, "I have never heard of East Syracuse."

"Well, it's not really as well known as Syracuse," I say.

"Syracuse is still fairly new."

"What, no it isn't. It's been around like forever. Especially because of the college and sports teams."

"College?"

"You know, Syracuse University. Founded in 1870. It's a pretty popular college. Where are you from?" I ask. Maybe she was from far away.

"Oh yes the college, how could I forget," Sara smiles, "I'm from Syracuse actually, but the college is not really too well known outside of Syracuse."

"Huh. I thought everyone knew about it. Hey, what's today? How long was I out?"

"It is March 24th, you've been asleep for two days."

"Oh wow. I'm surprised no one is looking for me. Hey, where's my cell?" I ask her.

"Here is your purse," Sara says handing over my purse, "But what is a cell?"

I look at her like she was crazy, "You know. A cell phone." I look through my bag, trying to find it.

"I have never heard of a cell phone."

"You're kidding," I say as the door to my room opens.

"Hello Mrs. O'Mara," Bucky says, "I'm here for Jessica."

"Oh hello James, she was waiting for you," Sara says.

"How do you know my name?" I ask him, "I never told you. Did you find Gabi? Is she okay? Did she talk to my mom?"

"I found Gabrielle, she was with my friend Steve," Bucky says, "She tried to call your parents but she couldn't get in contact with them or her family."

"Can you take me to her?" I ask, trying to stand.

"Of course," Bucky says as Sara hands me crutches. It takes me a few minutes as we walk down the hall to get used to them.

Bucky takes me out to the taxi that was waiting for us and we head to Brooklyn.

"The city still doesn't look right," I say, "What's going on?"

"Nothing is going on, unless we are still trying to get out of a depression."

"Depression? The last Depression was like 80 years ago."

"The depression started 10-12 years ago," Bucky says, "Here, we're here."

We get out of the taxi and walk up to an apartment, as Bucky opens the door I hear Gabi.

"Steve! Shoo! I will handle the cooking!"

"Gabi?" I ask, trying to hurry to where she is, which is hard with crutches.

"Jess?" Gabi asks. I hug my friend happily. Thankfully something is normal again.

"Gabi, thank goodness. Let's go home now," I say.

"Home where?" Gabi whispers, "I went to Ellis Island to look at the names, my family has never arrived."

"What are you talking about? Gabi, it isn't 1946! It's 2015! Someone is being very mean to us. I want to go home, not spend my time with creepy Mr. Military over there!"

"Jessica Arnold listen to me!" Gabi growls obvious mad now, "That nurse has my grandparent's last name! How do you explain that? We are not in 2015, we are in the past, I don't know how but we are. I would not lie about that Jessica. We shouldn't exist or be here. We have no home to go to."

"How the hell did we end up in 1943?" I ask, getting angry, "I'm leaving. Goodbye." I try to leave, but the military guy blocks my path, "Move."

"Jessica, please let me talk to you," Gabi says pulling me to a room, "Remember I am still older than you."

"I don't trust that guy! Something isn't right here and playing housewife won't fix anything! If you want to stay here with that other guy, fine. But I'm leaving."

"There is nowhere for you to go! I went back to Syracuse and East Syracuse is not there! There is nowhere for us to go, we are lucky they are willing to help us, so quit acting like a child and stop whining or I swear to God I will slap you silly."

"I just think we should be trying to figure out how to get back home! I don't want to sit around and wait for someone to fix our problems! We need to go out and try to solve this!"

"Don't you think I know that?" Gabi growls, "I am joining the army as a nurse so I can understand what exactly happened."

"You think the government is behind this?" I ask her.

"That is the only explanation, if anyone could create time travel it would be them."

"So what am I supposed to do? Should I join you?" I ask, "When are you going to join?"

"No, you cannot join, I am joining tomorrow. I need you here just in case someone else we know comes around."

"So I'm just supposed to stick around here by myself for God knows how long? Is your blond friend in the military too? Or is it just the creepy one that is?"

"Just Bucky, although Steve wants to join, but it's best if he doesn't. Can you make sure he doesn't?"

"So you want me to babysit him while you're gone? Sounds like a lot of fun," I say, "Should I play housewife."

"It won't be for long Jess, I promise."

"Fine. Just don't get yourself killed while you're gone. The main goal is to get home. So don't fall in love or anything."

"Too late for that last one," Gabi sighs, "Anyway I am just a nurse, it's not like I will be on the field or anything. Well at least I hope not."

"Too late? What, did you fall in love with the creep in the three days I was out cold in the hospital?" I ask sarcastically, "Were you worried at all?"

"Yes, I was worried, and no it isn't Bucky."

"Well, then who is he?" I ask, "Is he like your past boyfriends? Because we know how that will end. But seriously Gabi, we don't belong in this time. So I don't care if you have a crush, but don't act on it."

"Don't you think I know that? And no he isn't like my last boyfriends, he is sweet, caring, and kind. It's Steve ok?"

I try not to laugh at this, "The short, blond one? He's shorter than even you! Plus obviously if he isn't in the war yet that means they don't want him. What's wrong with him?"

"One: He isn't that much shorter then me, and Two: he isn't the healthiest person in the world. He has a lot of medical problems from what...my great grandmother has told me."

"You met your great grandmother? Gabi, haven't you seen any time travel movie? You can't interact with your family," I sigh, "When are you leaving for the war?"

"In the morning, Bucky, Steve and I are going to the Future Fair tonight," Gabi suppresses a laugh, "And I know the thing with family, but she was your nurse and also my grandfather is already alive and I am not blood related to them."

"The Future Fair?" I ask, "Isn't that a little pointless for you to go to? You know, us being from the future. Although it might be funny to see how wrong they are. I hope you have fun. Probably not the best place for someone with a broken foot."

"That's why you are staying here, and I am going to see how wrong they are."

"You're going to leave me here alone? What if something happens to me?" I ask her.

"Don't worry, you will be fine. As long as you do not try to leave the apartment, everything is pretty much one floor."

"Great. Have fun. I'll see you when I see you," I say, settling on the bed, "Whose room is this anyways?"

"It was Bucky's, but he let me use it."

I nearly fall off the bed at this comment, "Gross!"

"Oh come on Jess! It's not that bad! It's better than staying in like your brother's room."

"Whatever," I say, "Bring me back a souvenir from the fair. Have fun. I'll figure out something to do."

"I left magazines on the night stand," Gabi says grabbing her purse, "They aren't as good as the ones in our time but they'll do."

I watch Gabi leave the room and hear the front door open and close as Gabi and the two guys left the apartment. I grab one of the magazines and start flipping through it. Gabi was right. The magazines in this time kinda sucked. I look around the room. It's so boring in here. So I do exactly what Gabi told me not to do. I leave.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello everyone! Here's chapter 2 of this story. Special thanks to WaterGirl15 for helping me cowrite this story. Check out her stories.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own any Marvel character**

 **Warnings: Language and sexual**

The streets of 1940's New York City aren't that different besides the fact that there are almost no people or cars. The people I do see all seem to be heading to the same place. So I make the decision to follow them. The Future Fair seems like it'll be interesting. If I don't stay long, Gabi and the others will never know I was there, right?

It isn't that far from the apartment, although walking with crutches isn't exactly the easiest thing, especially with a broken foot. By the time I got there, I realized that maybe leaving the apartment was a mistake after all. I was already tired.

When I got inside, I found an area where I could sit down and there was a band. I order some onion rings and a soda and watch the bad play. They are really good.

"Jessica? What are you doing here?" I hear Steve ask.

"Who? I think you're mistaking me for someone else," I tell him my best English accent, "I'm Charlotte. My family sent me here from England after the war started. You Americans sure have some big parties."

"Nice try Jessica, but Gabrielle warned me that you do that to stay out of trouble."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I continue the accent, "Now run along and let me listen to this nice music."

"Alright 'Charlotte' I will make sure Gabrielle doesn't come this way," Steve smiles before leaving.

I exhale, but I'm not completely sure he won't tell Gabi he saw me here. Then I'd be in deep trouble. I keep a guard, looking around between the exits rather than paying attention to the band. A guy bumps into my table.

"Sorry," he smiles and then keeps walking.

He was clearly drunk. I hated alcohol. It was the stupidest thing. People make bad choices on it and too many people use it too much as a crutch to get through their lives. My step dad always jokes about how once I'm an adult with kids and a job I'll need it to take the edge off at the end of the day. I doubt it. I don't plan on working in a job that I hate that much. Of course, that's only true if I get back home. If not - I don't want to consider the alternative.

I take a sip of my soda and turn my attention back to the band. Slowly they start to sound better. But I don't want to just sit around anymore. I finish my soda and my snack and get up and start wandering around. The exhibits are really cool. There is a car that flies - well, sort of. It flew for a few seconds. I wonder why no one tried to perfect the design. We certainly don't have flying cars in the future.

After exploring the exhibits, I find a dance floor. I feel a tap on my shoulder and turn around to see the guy that had bumped into my table.

"Hi," I smile at him. I study him. He sort of looks like Steve, but he's tall and muscular. His hair is blond and his are blue like the sky or the ocean or something really blue.

"Would you like to dance?" he asks.

"I'd love to!" I smile and let him lead me to the dance floor. There are so many people. I've never liked big crowds, but I'm having so much fun.

"What's your name?" I ask him.

"Alex."

"That's a nice name. Are you in the war?" I ask him as we dance around to a fast song. I try to do what everyone else is doing, but I'm not a good dancer to start with and I don't know a lot of dances from the 40's.

"I am," he tells me, "I'm in the navy." His hands are all over me, but for some reason I really don't care. I'm having too much fun.

"The navy? That sounds like fun," I smile, "I've always loved the ocean. It's so blue and big."

I giggle as the song changed to a slow one and he pulls me tight. I put my head on his shoulder and we sway back and forth to the music like many other couples. His hands start to wander my body a little, but I don't mind. He seems really nice. I look down and remember my foot is broken, but I don't feel any pain in it. I feel like I'm floating on a giant fluffy cloud. I wonder for a moment if clouds taste like marshmallows. I bet they would be a comfy place to nap on.

Suddenly Alex is pulled away from me violently by a guy in tan, who grabs Alex by the collar of his shirt.

"What did you do to her?" the voice demands from Alex.

"What are talking about?" Alex asks as if he has no idea what the man is talking about, "I am just dancing with this lovely gal."

"You drugged her, didn't you?" he growls at Alex.

"So?"

The guy in tan punched Alex and sent him falling to the ground, seeing as Alex had already been a little unsteady on his feet.

"Hey!" I exclaim, "What the hell? We were just dancing. Mind your own business!"

"How can you dance with a broken foot?" he demands, "Do you have any idea how upset Gabrielle will be!?"

"You can't tell me what to do with my life! I don't know you! And Gabi can't tell me what to do either! I was having fun! So go away. I can handle myself. I don't need a stranger to act like my dad. My dad was a pretty crappy dad to start with!"

"Jessica, he drugged you and you were letting him touch you inappropriately, maybe I cannot tell you what to do or Gabi. But Gabi is the only person you have right now and you will make her worry beyond belief."

"I don't care! And maybe I like him! Did you ever think of that? And how do you even know my name? Why should you care what I do with my life which already sucked before I ended up in this awful city! No guy has ever paid attention to me and you just punched my best chance of being happy!"

"I have help you! See you don't even recognize me! It's me Bucky! This man is drunk and will do anything to get a girl, I am trying to help and protect you. But obviously you do not want someone to look out for you to make sure you are safe, I tried being a friend to you and I cannot do that if you do not see yourself making a huge mistake."

"A friend? You haven't done anything to help me! You're just some creepy guy that won't leave me alone and thinks because you are in a uniform you have to protect everyone! Well, you do a terrible job at it. Plus, you have no idea what I'm going through! You probably have girls throwing themselves at you, Mr. Tall-Dark Hair-Pretty eyes! So why don't you leave me alone?"

"Fine, I will leave. I will tell Gabrielle not to worry since her so-called-friend doesn't care that her only friend will be worried sick," Bucky says walking away.

I push my way through the crowd that had formed around us, going in the opposite direction, no longer caring about the guy I had been dancing with. I can't even think of his name now. I find myself an empty corner and sit down and wrap my arms around myself. I can feel myself shaking. I just want to go home. I hate it here.

I have no idea how long I sat there. The room starts to slowly empty as people head home. There are still plenty of people around. I can hear all the noise. I hope this whole thing is some sort of dream. I mean, I can't really be in 1943, can I? I feel someone sit down next to me. I lift my head slightly.

"Come to yell at me?" I mutter, "maybe you should have told her where I was."

"No, I am not going to yell," Bucky sighs, "I did tell her and she sent me to find you. She said I handled you poorly and she wanted me to make it up to you."

"It's not your fault. It's mine. I just hate it here. I want to go home, but I probably will never see my family again," I tell him, "I was mean to you and I'm sorry."

"I shouldn't have yelled though, I understand you are upset with being stuck here. I am the one who is sorry."

"You were just trying to look after me. If you hadn't found me, I'd probably be in a ditch or something right now and I don't have to be very imaginative to figure out what he would have done."

"That's why when I saw you I had to come and get you, I had no idea that he had drugged you until I got close."

"Did Steve tell you I was here?" I ask him, "I saw him earlier. He told me he wouldn't tell anyone, though. He probably should have," I push myself to my feet, "I'm going back to the apartment. Thanks for looking out for me."

"I'm going to walk with you, and no Steve didn't tell us. I was on the dance floor with Gabrielle when I spotted you, I told her to check on the Punk when I went to you."

"You don't have to walk me home. What about Gabi and Steve? Won't they look for you? I don't want them to be more worried."

"I told her to take him back to the apartment, I don't want you to go alone."

"Fine," I say, "Although I might need some help with the walking thing. It was hard enough to get here."

Bucky nods and he helps me get back to the apartment. It was easier with him helping me than it had been getting here. I was practically asleep on my feet so I was leaning heavily against him.

"Promise me something?" I ask him when we get back to the apartment.

"Anything."

"Don't do anything stupid that will get you killed," I say, "And keep in touch if you can. It'll be lonely around here."

"Of course. I wouldn't want you to feel alone."

"Thanks," I smile, "I better get to sleep. It's late."

"Me too, good night Jessica."

"Good night, Bucky," I use his name for the first time. I head into the bedroom and curl up and fall right asleep.

The next morning I went to watch my friends leave. Steve had been accepted into the army the night before and was heading to training camp and Gabi and Bucky were heading overseas. I would be completely alone for who knows how long. I stay until they are all long gone and then I take a cab back to the apartment.

Over the year that follows, I keep in contact with all three. Occasionally a month would pass without a letter, but that rarely happens. I keep a stack of all the letter in the drawer beside my - well, Bucky's - bed. While I am glad to hear from Gabi and Steve, Bucky's letters are always my favorite. He is actually a really sweet guy. I slowly become used to this version of New York City. I actually like that most people are friendly and there isn't a lot of traffic or people. Or course, most of the men are overseas. I get a job at a little bakery down the street after my foot heals.

However, a little after a year after they all left, two official looking letters arrive at my door. I don't even have to open it to know what is inside it. I haven't heard from either in almost 3 months. With shaky hands, I open the first envelope and read the letter.

 _To Miss Jessica Arnold,_

 _I regret to inform you that Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes from the 107th was captured in a zone around Berlin Germany by the Nazi science division called Hydra. We send our apologies and condolences but we have to list Sergeant Barnes as MIA assumed dead._

 _Colonel Phillips_

I read the letter about 5 times before it really sink in. I start to crying and am shaking.

"You promised. You promised. You promised!" I say over and over, getting louder each time, "YOU PROMISED!" I sit down on the steps with my knees pressed to my chest and sit there, outside the apartment, sobbing. I can't bring myself to open the other envelope. Two of my best friends are dead and the other is now just the government's dancing monkey. I really am alone now. I wonder if Steve knows yet. Who is going to tell him? He is not going to be happy, first his best friend and the girl he likes, considering Gabi told him before they left.

So I do another thing I wasn't supposed to do.

Once I calmed down, I walk right to the nearest recruitment office and sign up to go overseas to be a nurse. There is nothing left here for me, nothing for me to look forward to. The very least I can do is help other people.

I leave a week later. I quit my job at the bakery and talk to the landlord and give him most of my money so that if I do come back, at least I have a place to come back to. Steve too, if the government lets him go after the war. I pack up my stuff that I'm bringing with me and head to the train station.

The base is not what I expect. I arrive with other people and am met by a woman who was clearly not a nurse.

"Hello, I am Peggy Carter," the woman says, "You must be the new nurse."

"Yes," I say, "I'm Jessica Arnold. Nice to meet you. You don't look like a nurse."

"I am not a nurse, but I am in charge of what the nurses do, as you know your job is to help the wounded soldiers. We are no longer sending any nurses out after our last one was captured."

"Gabi," I whisper, "I know. She's why I'm here. Her and my friend Bucky got captured. He was in the 107th."

"I know, Gabrielle and Bucky talked about you before. You were also friends with Captain Rogers."

"I still get letters from Steve occasionally. Do you know where he is?" I ask. She probably can't tell me, but it wouldn't hurt to ask.

"We...we lost him behind enemy lines last night."

"What?" I whisper, "Steve just does shows! How could you send him behind enemy lines? He was supposed to be safe!"

"He went by his own choice."

"So I'm all alone now," I sigh, "Karma must really hate me. So, where do I work?"

"You will be working in your friend's old tent."

Peggy leads me to Gabi's old tent and when I enter the first thing I see is a frame with a picture of the two of us. I smile sadly at it. At least I know she used to be here. I only hope I can be as good a nurse as she was.

For a few days, it was really quiet. The things I got were basic injuries that didn't need much more than a bandage. I get to know Peggy really well. It's nice to have a friend to distract me from everything that was going on in my life. The soldiers are mostly nice to me because I am helping them, but some are bitter about the war and want to go home. I have no home to go to. I have given up hope of going back to 2015.

Suddenly, one afternoon, there is a lot of noise outside my tent. I leave my tent to see a large crowd of soldiers on foot. I wonder briefly what is going on, but I know I probably have a lot of work to do. I see the other nurses standing outside their tents, ready to treat the soldiers.

"Hey! Let's hear it for Captain America!" I freeze. Did someone just say Captain America? Steve was alright? I couldn't believe it.

"Can someone bring me medical supplies?" I hear a female voice ask. I grab my nurse bag.

"I'm coming!" I hurry towards the crowd and the female voice. Once I get through the crowd, I can see who asked and I stop in my tracks.

"Gabi?" I ask, staring at my friend, "But you're dead."

"Huh?" Gabi turns to face me and her eyes widen, "Jess? What are you doing here!?"

"I'm a nurse. That's pretty obvious. What was I supposed to do after I heard you and -" I cut off, "Died. Then I get here and find out Steve is dead too!"

"We weren't dead, just in captivity," Gabi says taking the bag, "Steve isn't either, he saved all of us."

"Well, you can start sending people towards my tent and the other tents. Is anyone badly hurt?"

"Only a few, as we left we had to fight. I will help, I am not too weak."

"Maybe you should get yourself looked at. You've been through a lot," I tell her.

"She is going to get checked out," Steve says taking Gabi's hand.

"When did that happen?" I ask, looking at their connected hands, "Apparently I missed a lot."

"You wouldn't believe how badly he freaked out when he found us," Bucky says. I turn at the sound of his voice and find him standing beside me. The first thing I do is slap him.

"Jess?" Bucky asks holding his cheek, "What the heck was that for?"

"Do you have any idea what I've been through the past few months? I thought you were dead! I thought all three of you were dead! I had no idea what I was supposed to do!"

"I'm sorry Jessica, Gabi and I were busy and we meant to send you a letter," Bucky says taking my hands, "But then Hydra found us and captured us."

The next thing I do is even more uncharacteristic than the first thing I did. I reach up and kiss him. I didn't know why I was doing it and it was almost like I have no control over what I am doing. I felt Bucky stiffen but then he wraps his arms around my waist.

"Well, it's about time," Gabi says from behind me. I pull away from Bucky and turn to face her.

"Oh shush," I say, "I bet you haven't been with Steve long."

"Well, it took Steve months to admit to me," Gabi says, "I told him when we left. Also it took him until I almost died from experimentation for him to tell me."

"You could have told him how you felt, you know," I say, "And experimentation? What does that mean?"

"Hydra did somethings to me, and I have no idea what."

"Did they experiment with anyone else?" I ask her, "Because you need to get looked at by one of the nurses ASAP. As does anyone else who they experimented on."

"That would only be Bucky and I, the others died," Gabi says as Steve took her to another nurse.

"You, Sargant, are coming to my tent," I told Bucky, "I have to check you over. Make sure you're still human."

"Alright," Bucky smiles, "Lead the way."

I walk back to my tent and open it so he can get in. I'm a little concerned about what Hydra might have done to Bucky and Gabi. Why did they survive when the others all died? What permanent damage would there be? I wouldn't find out the answer for a long, long time.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi everyone! Enjoy this chapter! Shout out to WaterGirl15 for helping me write this.**

 **Disclaimer: I'm not responsible for the creation of anything but the plotline and OCs**

 **Warning: Language!**

The next morning I'm up early. I didn't sleep well the night before. I guess I was too excited or something. I dress and hurry out of my tent, hoping to see him again. I can't believe I used to hate him. I look around the area and head quickly off to go great breakfast after I realize how hungry I am. With all the excitement the day before, I had forgotten to eat dinner.

"Gabi!" I smile, spotting my friend, "How are you feeling?"

"Better than I have for the last few days," Gabi smiles.

"That's good. Have you seen Steve yet? Is he alright?" I ask, "Or do I have to do my job?"

"I think he is with Bucky in the General's tent."

I frown, "That can't be good. I wonder what the General wants with him. I hope they aren't in trouble or something. They would hate to be discharged."

"Relax, Jess. Geez, they are only talking about what went on at the factory," Gabi shakes her head, "I just came from there."

"Oh. Have you had breakfast yet?" I ask, feeling warm. I'd gotten worried for no reason.

"Not yet, want me to join you?"

"If you want," I say, walking towards the mess hall.

"I think having a meal with my best friend is better than being alone," Gabi says following me.

"I thought Steve was your best friend."

"No, he's my _boyfriend_ you have been my best friend for a while now."

"Isn't your boyfriend supposed to be your best friend or something. That's what most girls seem to think," I say, then sigh.

"Well I guess but you still need friends. I have dated plenty of guys to know you need friends by your side too."

"Of course you need friends. Who else are you supposed to talk about guys to?" I joke, then frown, "I can't believe I kissed him. I'm such an idiot."

"What? You're not an idiot Jessica."

"This is 1943," I say, "Things don't work the same way. People have been staring at me all morning."

"Maybe that is because you have massive bed head, Jessica."

"I brushed it! We're in the middle of nowhere," I say, "And no, I'm pretty sure it's because of last night."

"Jess, it is not that. Don't forget we only have like five women here," Gabi says, "These guys want nothing more than to go home, have a beer and be with women."

"But I kissed him, not the other way around," I sigh, eating my tasteless breakfast, "I want to go home and have a good meal. Everything is boiled."

"Hey this is better than the crap they fed us at the factory," Gabi says, "And the thing with Bucky you aren't the only one who kissed a guy. I kissed Steve at the same time you kissed Bucky."

"You and Steve are dating! I'm sure he's kissed you before."

"Actually no. That was our first kiss, he didn't ask me to be his girlfriend until last night."

"Oh. But you said before that he admitted to liking you," I say, "Bucky thinks I hate him."

"That isn't the same as asking me out Jess, and Bucky knows you don't hate him."

"How do you know that?" I ask, "I was just a mess last night."

"We were stuck together for months, you get to know a person that way," Gabi sighs, "Jess stop beating yourself up, its not healthy trust me."

"I better get back to my tent," I stand, now done with my breakfast, "I'll see you later."

"Well, later Bucky, Steve and the other guys are heading back to the base in New York and I am joining them so I may not see you."

"Oh. Have fun back in New York," I try not to sound disappointed, then walk back to my tent.

"Miss Arnold," Peggy says entering my tent around noon.

"Hello Agent Carter," I look up from cutting bandages, "How may I help you."

"We need you to come back with us to New York."

"Why? I'm a nurse, not a soldier."

"Sergeant Barnes asked for his personal nurse to come with him, he feels that he may need you."

"Personal nurse? Since when?" I ask, "I didn't agree to that."

"I am not sure, but Bucky insists that you come."

"What if I say no?" I ask, not looking back up from my work.

"He may come and convince you."

"I'd like to see him try," I say, "Tell him I say no."

"Alright," Peggy says leaving my tent. I turn my focus back to organizing my tent and my supplies. I am no one's personal nurse. Certainly not him. And I have been known to be very, very stubborn.

"Jess?" Bucky asks walking into my tent.

"Are you injured?" I ask, my back still to him.

"You're mad about the whole "personal nurse" thing right?" he asks, "Gabi said it was a stupid idea."

"Sir, this is nurse's tent. You have no right to be in here if you are not a nurse or injured. Since you are neither of the two, I have to ask you to leave."

"Ok, ok. I will see you when I get back, I love you Jess," he says as he leaves. I turn around quickly and grab his arm to stop him from leaving.

"What did you just say?" I growl at him.

"I said I love you."

"I don't think I heard you right," I say, giving him one more chance to fix this before I go nuclear on him.

"I said that I love you, Jess."

"No, you don't," I tell him, "You don't know anything about me, Sergeant Barnes. So I suggest you amend that statement and make yourself scarce before I count to 3."

"I do know things about you Jess and I am not going to change how I feel about you."

"1," I start counting.

"I am not changing my feelings."

"2," I threaten, glaring at him, "You won't like me when I get to 3."

He just stood there refusing to move.

"2 and a half," I say, "And by the way, that thing that happened last night; it was a mistake on my part. It never should have happened."

He doesn't say anything or moves even a little.

"I'm not from this time. I'm not an idiot. I know better than to get involved with anyone. Even if that means I spend my life alone. Because otherwise I'll mess up time. And you know what, you are annoying," I say, "'Personal nurse?' You have no right to make me your stupid slave or something. I'm here to help people until I can just go home and forget about you and all of this."

"I only said that to get you to come with us somewhere safe, is it so bad that I want to make sure you do not get hurt? I do not want you to go through what Gabrielle and I did, I do not want you to die," Bucky says, "I missed you like crazy while I was in Europe and I meant that I will never change my feelings for you."

I slap him, "I don't need you to protect me! I can take care of myself. I've been doing it for months now while you guys played soldier. I can continue to do so on my own. So if you think you can say or do anything that will make me go back to New York with you, you're wrong. You broke your promise and I don't give second chances to people, especially pathological liars."

After I said that I felt a hand against the back of my head, and it wasn't light either. I glare at Bucky thinking he slapped me but he looked at the person in shock. I turn to see Gabi standing there with a seriously pissed off look on her face.

"Are you eavesdropping?" I ask her, angrily, "Does no one respect my privacy? Why can't people leave me alone?!"

"Oh shut the fuck up!" Gabi yells slapping me harder across the face.

"This idiot just lied to me!" I say, "Excuse me for being mad."

"Just shut your damn mouth for a minute!" Gabi growls, "Bucky isn't lying, he loves you a lot I tried to stop him being stupid because I knew you would go nuts. But you went too far that's why I am stepping in. You need to stop being a stubborn ass and believe people for a change! And do not give me the excuse "That no one ever loved me" I have been through shit like this and you are just making things worse by pushing people away!"

"I can't get close to people in this time! You shouldn't either! We will end up back home and then I'll have to hear about it for the rest of my life about how much you loved him and all that usual garbage about your exes! It's annoying! So just mind your own damn business and leave me the hell alone!"

"We are never going home Jess! There is no way to get home! And if you think for once maybe everything we are doing has already affected the fabric of time, going into the past means what we do has already happened even long before we were born. And believe me I know about the exes thing I have been hearing about it since Ben, why do you think I tried to kill myself five times!?"

"Someone sent us here! They must have the technology to bring us back! I can't give up hoping on that. I want to go home! I hate it here! I hate all this military stuff! I hate the war! I hate this stupid nurse's costume! I miss being mostly equal! They treat women like crap in this time! If I have to wear another dress, I am going to kill someone!"

"Like our time was any better? They treat women like objects to be looked at! We have to look a certain way or guys will never like us, we have to wear certain clothes or we won't fit in. I rather be here where you can look anyway and still be loved by someone. We don't know if whoever sent us here will bring us back so we might as well make the most of it," Gabi says glaring at me.

"I liked our time! No guys looked at me at all! I would wear loose t shirts from the men's section and jeans or short if I wanted to! I didn't have to wear dresses or makeup. I could just be me! Now, I'm stuck here with Sergeant Barnes harassing me and society is going to force me to get married, have kids, and be a housewife! I don't want that! I want to be happy! I want to be me! Most of my favorite books haven't been written!"

"You are so self-centered Jessica, do you think I like it here? Everything I enjoyed doesn't exist either and I hate wearing dresses and makeup too. But I rather make the most of the situation than whine about the whole thing, and don't worry about me bugging you anymore because I am done with you. I rather be alone without you than listen to you whine about this, yes I ranted to you in our time but I had such a shitty life there and here I am not being harassed by so called friends."

"I had a crappy life too, you know! But I tried not to annoy my friends with all the crap going on! No one wants to listen to that! I've never even kissed a guy before! I've already accepted the fact that I'm meant to be alone! But at least I know I can have the job I want! Here everyone just expects you to be a mother and a maid! I'm going for a walk. Bye."

"I know you had a crappy life Jess because you told me and I listened. You are not smart,Jess if you ever listened in history class woman get their rights during the war and get jobs!" Gabi growls and runs off.

"We're not even equal in our time!" I call as I go off in the opposite direction, into the woods.

"Jessica!" Bucky yells.

"What do you want?" I yell, "To ruin my life more?"

"Ruin it? I did nothing to ruin your life, you did that yourself," Bucky says, "I saved your life twice."

"I didn't ruin my life! Whoever made that damn time machine ruined my life! Now what am I supposed to do? I want my family. I have nobody left." I sit down on the grass against a tree.

"Maybe listen to Gabrielle's advise and make the most of this journey you're on. You may not have your family but you have friends here that care about you Jessica," Bucky says sitting near me.

"It's not quite the same thing, Sargent," I say, "I never should have joined the military. I was fine working in that bakery. It was fun. I think I'll go back there once they let me out."

"Then do that, and it may not be the same as having your family but it is better than being alone. Steve and I have been friends for years and after his mother died I became his family and look at how he is."

"He's all big and muscled now, though. I think he can handle himself."

"I know that, but I will always be there for him. For us we are together till the end of the line," Bucky says, "Gabrielle said she would do the same for you, she cares a lot for you Jessica she was worried about what you would do after we were captured."

"Well, she has right to be worried. I make bad choices," I sigh, "I don't know what to do."

"Maybe apologizing will help, you and Gabrielle need each other to support one another. And Jess I didn't lie when I promised I would return, if it wasn't for Gabrielle I would have been killed instead of captured."

"Oh. Well, I guess I should be glad then. I'm sorry for being mean. Please just don't say that thing again."

"I won't but that doesn't mean I didn't mean it," he says standing, "We better hurry the plane leaves soon."

"You mean you better hurry? I don't think I should go."

"Maybe not go to New York but to apologize to Gabrielle."

"She doesn't want to talk to me. I'll wait until you guys get back. I'll see you later. Please don't get killed, Bucky."

"It's just a trip to New York I will be fine."

With that Bucky leaves me behind to leave with Steve and Gabi. I walk back to my tent after I watch the plane leave. I'll ask Bucky about it when he gets back. The camp suddenly feels a whole lot more lonely. There is no one scheduled to come home back to the base soon, so I just have to wait around.

A days that follow until my friends return are painstakingly slow. I'm about ready to just walk back to New York if I have to. The only patients are ones that need sobering up or got drunk and into a fight. I got tired of cleaning up vomit and patching up knuckles very quickly. I lost track of time and my surroundings and grew numb. I didn't let myself think of anything but my work. Soon I heard commotion coming from outside my tent, it has been five days since my friends left maybe they are back. I doubt it, though. They will probably be gone a lot longer than a few days.

"Jess! They're back!" one nurse calls into my tent.

"Who's back?" I call back to her, confused.

"The Captain and your friends!"

"Already?" I ask, "It's only been 5 days."

"They are only here for a little bit, if you want to see them you better hurry," she says before leaving.

I hurry out of my tent and try to find my friends quickly. I don't want them to leave without me apologize to Gabi and tell Bucky how I feel about him. I find them near the General's tent and they are dressed differently.

"Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes," I call from across the way.

"Miss Arnold," Bucky says seeing me.

"My friend says you're leaving again," I say.

"We are in two hours."

"Can I speak with you in my tent?" I ask.

"Alright, Lieutenant I will be back," Bucky says looking at Gabi.

"Yes sir," Gabi answers. I walk back in the direction of my tent and walk inside and sit down on the bed.

"You want to talk to me?" Bucky asks entering my tent.

"About the thing you said earlier… I shouldn't have gotten mad at you. If you actually meant it, that is."

"I do mean it."

"Well, I'm glad you do. And that you feel like that about me. Maybe once this war is over, we can be together."

Bucky smiles at me. I took his hand and smile at him.

"You have pretty eyes, you know that?" I ask him, looking into his deep blue eyes.

"I guess, but I think yours are beautiful."

"Mine? Hazel is such a common color. And definitely not as beautiful as blue eyes," I say, "I wish I could come with you. Where are you going?"

"We are destroying Hydra bases, we have a new team called Howling Commandos."

"Alright. Well, stay safe, okay. Come back to me," I say and stand up, wrapping my arms around him.

"I will do my best, I swear."

"Good. Can you send Gabi in? I owe her an apology before you guys all leave again."

"Of course," He walks out of my tent and I can hear him calling Gabi. I look around my tent and wait for my friend to come into the room.

"You asked to see me," Gabi says entering.

"Yeah. Hi," I say, "I just want to say I'm sorry for being a bad friend."

"It's ok, I shouldn't have yelled."

"Just stay safe, okay," I tell her, "I need all of you to come back to me. I can't lose you guys again."

"I will do my best Jessica."

"Good," I hug her, "I'm going to miss you. When will you be back?"

"I'll miss you too, hopefully we will be back in five or six months."

"I'll see you then," I smile, "I'll hold down the fort here."

"Good luck with that, be careful around the guys," Gabi laughs.

"I'll tell them I'm taken," I smile at her, "It's not a lie."

"I'm glad Jess," soon we hear Steve's voice calling, "I better go now."

I hug her one more time and then follow her out of the tent and walk back over to Bucky, "Hey, soldier, come here a minute."

Bucky walks over to me while the others load the truck.

"Kiss me," I tell him.

He looks at me in shock but soon kisses me. It just feels right to me. Like we belong together. Soul mates. I used to not believe in that stuff, but now..

"Go on, soldier, or you'll miss your ride."

"Goodbye love, I will come back to you. I will do my best anyway."

He gives my hand a kiss before walking over to the truck and getting in the back. I watch the truck leave and don't move until the truck is far out of sight.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello readers! Sorry this took so long. I'm actually writing chapter 9 right now. I haven't written in about a week, thanks to my new Netflix subscription and an addicting show called** ** _Once Upon A Time_** _._ __ **But Now I've seen all the episodes. So, here you go.**

 **Special thanks to WaterGirl15. She has her own version of the story now.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't have any legal rights to any Marvel stuff**

 **Warnings: Language and sexual**

 **8 Months Later**

I keep count of the days that pass. My friends have been gone for eight months now and I miss them dearly. From the films that we watch at the camp, it looks like everything is going fine with them. I am still rather nervous that something will happen and I'll lose them forever. I hate having to wait and wonder.

"Jess?" I hear Peggy say outside my tent.

"Come in," I say. Peggy and I have become really close over the past few months at the camp.

"I got a message from the Commandos," Peggy says entering my tent, "They are not too far from the camp right now."

"Really?" I ask her, excited, "Are they going to come visit? I miss Bucky."

"No, but we can go and see them."

"Alright, where and when can we see them?" I ask her, smiling at the good news.

"They are in a town not too far from here, we will be leaving in an hour."

"Alright. That gives me time to clean up and change. Thank you," I say, "I'm excited."

"I can tell, I will come and get you when we leave," Peggy smiles before leaving my tent.

I spend the next hour washing up and then figuring out what to change into. I have never been very good at picking out outfits, especially since coming to the 1940's. Fashion is so different here than it was in the 21st century. Soon we head to the bar where the Howling Commandos are for the day, by the time we arrive it is about 7 pm.

I look around the bar, standing behind Peggy. Why am I suddenly so nervous? I'm just meeting my friends, nothing more, right? That's when I spot Steve and Bucky at a table, why does Steve look so nervous? I stand there like an idiot, just staring at the pair of guys. I am frozen like an intricate ice sculpture.

"Jess? Are you alright?" Peggy asks.

"Not really," I tell her honestly, "What if he met someone new? What if he doesn't want to see me?"

"Just go and talk to him," Peggy says pushing me towards Steve and Bucky. I unfreeze and start walking slowly towards the boys.

"Jessica!" Bucky smiles.

"Hello," I say quietly, looking down at my feet.

"I'm glad to see you," Bucky says pulling me into a hug. I don't know what to say or do, so I just kind of awkwardly stand there. Why am I such an idiot around him?

"So how is my gal?"

"Your gal?" I ask, "Since when?" Sure, now my confidence is back.

"Sorry, I guess I never asked properly," Bucky scratches his neck awkwardly.

"Well, I'm waiting," I put my hands on my hips.

"Jessica, will you be my gal?"

"What if I say no?" I ask sassily.

"I will wait a while and then ask again."

"So you won't take no for an answer? That sounds familiar."

He just shrugs but gives me a smile.

"Fine. I'll be your girlfriend."

He smiles me and gives me a kiss. I gently kiss him back and feel his arms wrap protectively around me.

"Why is Steve so nervous?" I ask Bucky quietly.

"He is planning on proposing to Gabrielle," Bucky whispers.

"What?" my eyes widen, "Is he crazy? Did he get hit hard on the head?"

"Oh haha, well yes he did, but he really loves Gabrielle so he wants to make sure they will be together forever."

"What happens when Gabi and I are brought back to the right time?" I ask him.

"I talked about that with Gabrielle about that, she says that she may stay here to be with him."

"I can't stay here if they give me the chance to go back," I tell him.

"Then we will make the most of the time we have together."

"I like that idea," I smile at him, "Want to get a table?"

"Lets sit here, I want to see Gabrielle's face when Steve asks."

"We need to give them a little space. Let's sit a couple tables away, okay?" I tell him, more than ask him.

"Fine."

I take him to a table four tables away from Steve, I guess doing that made Steve even more nervous. Oops, oh well. This will be quite the show. I sit down, smirking to myself. Suddenly I could hear whistling coming from the other men and I turn to see Gabrielle walk in dressed in a blue party dress.

"Wow. She looks nice," I tell Bucky.

"Well I did make her get the dress, now Steve is even more nervous," Bucky laughs.

"You're evil," I smirk at him, "Let's order some popcorn."

We both laugh and do that while Steve stands to talk to Gabi. He looks really pale. I've never seen him be anything but confident before. It was kinda amusing. He looked like an oversized puppy right now.

"Gabrielle," Steve says.

"Steve," Gabi smiles.

"Y-you look amazing."

"oh...Thank you," Gabi blushes. I have never seen blush like that before.

"Gabrielle...I...uh...I wanted to tell you something," Steve stammers.

"Yes Steve?"

"Gabrielle when I met you I knew you are something special, and you proved it being my friend and supporting me when I was trying to get into the army. When you got captured I was scared that I had lost you without telling you how much you mean to me," Steve takes a deep breath and gets down on one knee, "Gabrielle Barton will you marry me?"

I see Gabi's eyes widen and she covers her mouth with her hands. My eyes water a little. That was so romantic of Steve.

"Yes!" Gabi smiles as tears fall. I stand up and clap and am joined by a lot other people in the bar.

The other commando members go to them and pats Steve on the back after Steve places the ring on Gabi's finger.

"Good for her. She deserves to be happy."

The bartender gives everyone drinks in celebration of Captain America and his Lieutenants engagement. I forget that I told myself long ago that I was never going to drink a lot. I end up losing track of how much I drink.

"Let's go dance!" I tell Bucky, giggling.

We dance for a bit until Bucky takes me back to his hotel room for the night before he leaves the next day.

I wake up in the morning with a major headache. The night before was mostly a blur. Where even am I?

"Good morning Jess," I hear Bucky say.

"Bucky? What happened last night? Where are we?"

"We are in my hotel room," Bucky answers as he gets ready.

"Your hotel room?" I swallow, "Umm… I don't remember much of last night. I've never really drank before. I promised myself I wouldn't. And now I did."

"Hey it's ok, we were celebrating sometimes it happens," Bucky says, "I don't remember much either."  
"Bucky! Time to go!" I hear Dugan's voice call through the door.

"Stay safe," I tell him, "I'll miss you."

"I will miss you too, I will do my best to come back to you," he kisses me before leaving.

I stand up and walk into the bathroom and turn the shower on really hot before stepping in. What had happened last night? I searched my mind and came up with nothing. I lean against the wall of the shower and let the water sting my skin.

I finish my shower and my skin is red. I pull on my dress from the night before and find my way back to the base, not knowing that I wouldn't see some of my friend for a long time.

The news comes a few weeks later. I'm in my nurse's tent, finishing up bandaging a clumsy soldier who had ran into a tree.

"Jessica," Peggy says entering my tent.

"Hello Peggy," I smile at her, then turn to the soldier, "You can go now. Just watch where you are going in the future."

The soldier leaves my tent and I turn to see Peggy looks upset about something.

"Peggy? What's wrong?" I ask her, concern.

"I am so sorry but...James Barnes and Gabrielle Barton are listed KIA," Peggy says, "The mission to capture Arnim Zola turned and Gabrielle and Bucky fell off the train."

"What?" I whisper, my eyes starting to water.

"I am so sorry Jessica, Gabrielle tried to save Bucky but they both ended up falling."

"B-b-but," I cry, "He promised he'd come back."

Peggy says nothing more. I cry until I get sick and then curl up into a ball on the floor and rock slowly back and forth. My best friend and my boyfriend are both dead. I'm all alone now.

"Wait," I say, my voice hoarse, "Is Steve okay?"

"He is very upset right now, he is blaming himself for what happened."

"Where is he?" I ask quietly.

"He is in a broken down bar by himself."

I head off to see Steve and I find him in the broken down bar sitting alone and drinking a beer.

"This seat taken?" I ask him.

"Oh no, go ahead," Steve says.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask him.

"Want to know the worst thing? I can't even get drunk," he sighs.

"I'm done with alcohol after what happened," I say, "I don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to be here anymore. I wish there was a way for me to go home."

"I'm sorry Jessica, its my fault they are gone. I should have been able to save them."

"It's not your fault. It's Hydra's fault. And feeling sorry for yourself isn't going to make you feel better. You need to get up and go kick Hydra where it hurts."

"When this is over I will help you find a way home."

"I don't think there is a way for me to go home," I confess, "I gave up on that a couple months ago."

"Well once I get back we can live together to support one another."

"That's better than being alone," I sigh, "When do you leave again?"

"My mission is in a few days."

"Alright. Please don't die," I tell him, "I can't be alone."

"I will do my best, Jessica." I smile sadly. That's what Bucky always would say.

Steve soon leaves for his mission and I am back at the apartment that Steve and Bucky and since the 107th have all returned home, so have I. Lately I've just been feeling awful. I miss Bucky and Gabi so much.

I relax on the couch, considering going back to the bakery to get my job back, but I don't want to do anything right now. I thought being home and away from the war zone would help me, but it only made things worse. I end up getting up to escape my thoughts and search through the apartment just for something to do. As I go through the room Gabi and I shared I find her purse, I look inside it when I noticed a journal with the Hogwarts crest on the cover. I feel nostalgic for the book series. I hadn't really thought much about it. The time jump had taken my two fandom necklaces from me. One had the amulet from the television show _Supernatural_ and the other combined the symbols of _Harry Potter, Hunger Games, Divergent, Mortal Instruments, and Percy Jackson and the Olympians_ , as well as my Lightwood family ring.

"Wait...how is this here?" I open up the journal and look through the pages curiously.

I find the page that is dated from 2012, just after a big event in New York City. I read through it when one name catches my eye, Captain America. Wait how is that possible? It shouldn't be possible. As look through more I see sketches of the Hydra symbol and another symbol.

"What the?" I frown, "I can't be the same Captain America…" Suddenly the doorbell rings. I close the journal and set it on the bed and go to answer the door.

"Hello?" I ask, opening the door.

"Miss Arnold," a soldier says, "Telegram."

"Thank you," I say, then go back inside and open up the envelope.

Once again it is a letter telling me that Steve is assumed dead after stopping Shmidt's plane from attacking America.

I crumble the letter up and throw it away. Why? Why is everyone dying but me? I am completely alone in this world now.

"No one's best is ever good enough," I say, "But why take everything away from me? What am I supposed to do now?" I get louder. But instead of wrecking the apartment, I collapse face down on the couch and tell myself I will simply never get up. I could pretend I was dead too.

I have no idea how long I lay there. I have given up all hope. I feel nothing but sad and occasionally nauseated. I wish that I could see them again, but I know that is impossible.

One day, there is another knock on my door. I don't bother to get up and answer it. I don't want any more bad news.

"Jess, I know you're in there," a familiar female voice calls, "Open the door or I'll open it myself."

"Go away!" I yell back, "I want to be alone!" Apparently, she doesn't like the answer, because a moment later I hear her messing with the lock and the door swings open. She closes the door behind her.

"You can't just lay here forever, you know," she tells me, "People die. I know you're upset. I am too, but the world continues to spin on. Have you checked the news? The war is over. We won. So, we are going to celebrate. Get up, take a shower, and get dressed. I'm not leaving until you do."

"I need more time," I tell her, sitting up, "I'm not ready."

"It's been six weeks since Steve disappeared. Bucky and Gabi have been gone for two months. You need to go out and make new friends. Laying around won't do anything but upset you more."

"It's been two months?" I ask her, "No, that's not possible. It's just not possible."

"Why not?" she asked, "You can't tell me you haven't moved from this couch in six weeks."

"Hardly!" I exclaim, "I haven't needed to!" I get up and start pacing in circles, panicking.

"It's not that bad," she says, "You haven't missed much."

"You don't understand. I have missed a lot," I say, "The when the guys were at that bar near the base, I drank more than I should have. I don't remember that night or what I did."

"Oh," Peggy says, her mind finally clicking, "you think you are with child?"

"It makes sense," I whisper, "My first time, and I don't even remember it. And now I have to raise a baby on my own? I wasn't even married? What will people say."

"Just relax. Look, I'll call my doctor and book you an appointment. In the mean time, we should go out and do some shopping and what not. I'll stay with you here for a while. Okay?"

"Okay," I wipe my eyes, "Thank you. I'll go take a shower and get ready." I walk into the bathroom and turn on the water. I disrobe and look over my body for any signs of something different. I can tell I lost weight, which is something I've been meaning to do for a while, but not like this. I examine my abdomen, looking for something, anything. But it's only been around 2 months, so there is nothing there to see, so I step into the shower. The water has gone cold, but that's fine, because it wakes me up. I scrub my skin roughly, wanting to purify myself, but no amount of soap could ever do that. I wash my hair and start to work the knots out of it. I finish my shower and dry off, then run a brush through my hair, working out the rest of the knots.

By the time I step out of the bathroom in a baby blue dress, it's been about an hour and my stomach growls.

"Peggy? Can we get dinner first? I'm hungry."

"That sounds nice," she smiles, "I called my doctor while you were in the shower. He can fit you in tomorrow morning at 8 as a favor for me."

"That soon?" I ask.

"Well, we need to confirm it and make sure everything is okay if it is true. If it is, at least you have a piece of Bucky."

"I suppose you're right," I tell her, "Come on, let's go."

We end up at a cute little diner with 'famous' cheeseburgers and real milkshakes. I order a chocolate milkshake and grilled cheese and tomato soup - my classic comfort food. It makes me feel a little bit better and at least I'm not hungry anymore. Chocolate helps a lot, like always. I start to wonder what my child will be like, then I remind myself that there may not even be one, but that doesn't really stop me from wondering.

After dinner, Peggy and I go to the store and she buys a bunch of groceries. I go home and unpack them while she goes to her apartment to get some stuff. After I finish unpacking the groceries, I go into the bathroom and wash up and brush my teeth, feeling exhausted. I walk into my room and lay down, and sleep cocoons me like a warm blanket.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi readers! I'm writing Chapter 11 now, so I thought that I should start putting out more chapters, especially before I start college in 3 weeks. Anyways, I wrote this chapter myself, so sorry about any grammatical errors. Also, this chapter may not be the most interesting, but it is important to the story.**

 **Warnings: Langauge and natural stuff**

 **Disclaimer: Not mine**

I wake up to the smell of eggs and bacon and it immediately makes me nauseated. I force the feelings down, but they don't help the situation. They only seem like more confirmation of a fact that I don't want to be true.

I walk out into the kitchen in my pajamas - not very proper, but who cares.

"Good morning, Peggy," I yawn, "Breakfast smells pretty nice."

"Thank you. And good morning to you, too. How are you feeling?"

"Well, I woke up feeling sick, if that's what you mean. I don't think I need a doctor to confirm it. I don't feel like I am."

"Well, it's too early for much to be going on," Peggy says, "I was 14 when my brother was born. I helped my mother quite a bit. And I'll help you through this. I'm your best friend."

"Thank you," I say, my eyes watering, "Why am I crying? There's no reason to cry."

"It's probably just your changing hormones," Peggy said, "You'll be emotional. Now, let's have breakfast and then you need to get ready for your appointment. Okay?"

"Alright," I say. I look at the plate in front of me. I pick up my fork and eat some of my eggs and chew my bacon. I eat about half of my breakfast. Then, I get up and go to the bathroom. I take a quick shower and slip into a purple floral print dress. I do my hair up and step out of the bathroom.

"Are you ready to go?" Peggy asks me.

"Ready as I'll ever be," I tell her honestly. If this was my time, this wouldn't be that big a deal. But this isn't my time. It's 1944. Things are quite a bit different now.

We head down to the street and get a cab to the doctor's office. I walk slowly in, behind Peggy. I walk up to check in.

"Name?" The receptionist asks me.

"Jessica Arnold," I tell her.

"Have a seat in the waiting room," she says, "The doctor will be with you shortly, Mrs. Arnold."

"It's Miss," I tell her, hoping that she didn't know why I was here.

"Oh," she said, "My apologies. Have a seat." She gave me a friendly smile. I walk away from her and go sit down in the waiting room. Peggy sits down beside me.

"I hate all this waiting," I tell her, "I'm just very nervous. I feel like everyone is judging me."

"It happens," she says, "Don't worry. No one knows why you are here."

"I hope not," I say, "Maybe people just assume that I'm married. That would be good. Except I don't have a ring."

"Don't worry. The doctor is nice. He won't judge you. I promise."

"Jessica Arnold," a nurse calls. I stand up.

"Want me to come with you?" Peggy asks me.

"Please," I tell her and she stands up as well and we walk over to the nurse and follow her into a room.

The nurse takes my height, weight, and blood pressure. Then she starts asking me questions.

"What symptoms have you been having?" the nurse asks me.

"Symptoms?" I ask, "I don't feel that different. I mean, I've been a bit nauseated, but that's about it."

"Are you sexually active?" she asks.

"Active? No. My boyfriend died in the war. We did sleep together once, though."

"Any weight gain or mood swing?"

"No," I tell her, "I don't think so." She continues asking me questions and writing down the answers. It's getting a little annoying, but what can I do.

"I'll get the doctor to come in shortly," she tells me and leaves the room. I sit on the bed in the room and swing my legs back and forth, nervous.

"What if something's wrong?" I ask Peggy, "How come I still feel normal? Is that bad? Do you think the nurse was judging me?"

"No, of course not. Doctors and nurses are just here to help you. That's all. She doesn't care what you do. Everything is confidential."

"It won't be if I'm right about what's going on. People will notice."

"They won't know your backstory," Peggy says. The door opens and a handsome looking doctor walks into the room.

"Hello Agent Carter. How are you?" he smiles at my friend.

"I'm well, thank you. And yourself?" Peggy asks

"I can't complain. I like this line of work. I take it this is your friend Miss Arnold?" he asks, but it doesn't sound like a question.

"Yes," I say, "Nice to meet you, sir."

"Dr. Carson," he says, looking at my file, "So, you think you're expecting?"

"I don't know what to think. That's why I'm here. For some answers," I tell him.

"Well, there's no real way to tell, but based on your symptoms, it would appear that you are. There are a few tests, but they are a little pricy. We can do them if you want."

"No, that's okay. What should I do?" I ask him.

"Well, you need lots of rest. Make sure you eat healthy and get some exercise. Other than that, there's not much to it," he tells me.

"Do I need to come back?" I ask him.

"Not here. I'll give you the number to an obstetrician in case something doesn't seem right."

"Okay. Thank you, Dr. Carson," I say. I stand up and he writes down a number and gives it to me. Peggy and I leave the doctor's office.

"Friend of yours?" I ask her.

"Something like that. He's married to my cousin, so he's family. He's pretty smart," Peggy says, "I went to school with him."

"You had a crush on him, didn't you?" I ask her, smirking a little.

"Yes, I did. But I never had a chance with him. He was in love with my cousin. He's a good man, but I don't see him as my type anymore."

"Who is your type?" I ask her. We'd never really had this kind of girl talk before. It was trivial in the war. There were more important things going on during the war.

"Well, there is a soldier from the 107th that I met. He's really nice. He keeps asking me out."

"Have you gone out with him?" I ask her, curious.

"No, I've been busy with some stuff. And now I'm taking care of you," she tells me.

"Hey, I'm only 7 weeks. I've got another 33. I can handle myself for now. Go out with him. Have fun. But not too much fun. You don't want to be in my situation."

"I don't see him dying anytime soon," she jokes, "I know. Fine, I'll call him when we get back to the apartment. Are you going to get a job? Are you getting their pensions?"

"Yeah, but I'm going to put most of it away or use the money to start getting baby stuff or something. I'll talk to the coupe who run the bakery and see if I can get my job back. I liked working there before I joined the war."

"I think keeping busy is a good idea," Peggy tells me, "I'll keep your mind off things. And Jess, I do hope you make it back to your time. You deserve that much."

"Yeah, but what do I tell my mom? I mean, Gabi is dead and I'll be going back home pregnant or with a baby. How would I explain that?"

"I'm sure you'd think of something," she says.

I do end up getting my job at the bakery back. The couple is nice and understanding. Their kids have grown, so they offer me some of their old baby things. They refuse to let me pay them for what they give me, saying that they don't need it and that I'm a nice girl. I think they feel sorry for me, but it doesn't even matter. I'm basically alone with no hopes of getting home. I probably won't even be able to find a husband in this time because I'll have a baby and I'm not longer 'pure.'

As time ticks away, it becomes pretty clear that I'm expecting a child. My dresses become a little too tight, so we going on a shopping trip for maternity clothes. I'm really glad that Peggy is by my side every step of the way.

She had called that soldier, and they have been on several dates. I notice a positive change in my friend, and I can tell she's happy with him in the same way I was happy with Bucky. Good for her, she deserves to be happy.

I start to keep a journal of everything. I write down my story from when we were in our New York City, to meeting Bucky and Steve, joining the war, thinking they were dead, the night that I don't remember, then finding out about my baby. I write down anything important that happens with the baby and the dates. I didn't personally know many people that have been pregnant, and I didn't really know what to make of it or what to expect. It was like being blindfolded and stuck on the world's longest and scariest roller coaster and you couldn't get off of it. I keep Gabi's journal close and look through it whenever I miss her. I'm curious as to who adopted Steve's persona as Captain America in the attack on New York in 2012. Everyone knew about Tony Stark's Iron Man. The guy is loaded and a genius. I try to remember the others. There was the Hulk, a guy with a bow and arrows, a girl, and a guy with long blond hair and a hammer. It had been a really strange phenomenon that no one could really explain. I hadn't really thought about it lately until I found Gabi's journal. Now the event is constantly on my mind for some reason. It's a bit unsettling, but there is nothing I can do about it, right?

Around my eighth month, another apartment opens up in my building.

"You should rent that apartment that just opened up," I tell Peggy as I finish making dinner.

"What about you? Don't you still need help?" She asks me, setting our places at the table.

"Of course I do. But you wouldn't be far away and you would have your own space and whatnot. Plus I could use your old room for the baby."

"I suppose I could if you want me to, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to spend some of my free time helping you," she says, "You are my best friend and you did say it's getting challenging to do your normal daily activities."

"I know that, but I'm not once I have this kid, I'll be able to take care of both of us. I want you to live your own life, Peggy. When's the last time you went out with your boyfriend?"

"A few weeks," she says honestly, "I've been a bit occupied with work and you."

"Call him. Go out to dinner Friday night or something. I promise I'll be fine," I use my newly practiced 'mom voice.'

"Now you sound like a mother. Have you thought of a name yet?" she inquires.

"Not really. I have a middle name picked out for both genders, but I can't think of first names," I sigh, "It's so frustrating. What if I can't think of one?"

"I'm sure you'll find something to name the little guy or girl. My mom had no clue with my little brother until she saw him and immediately knew his name."

"What's your brother's name?" I wonder.

"Thomas," she says, "But you can't name your child after my brother."

"I wouldn't want to. No offense to your brother, but I don't like that name. And neither does my kid," I smiled, feeling the baby move a little. He or she used to move a lot, but now, not so much. The obstetrician says that it's because the baby is running out of room. I can understand that. It's getting bigger faster than it's room is.

"Are you going to have a midwife come here to deliver?"

"Are you crazy?" I ask, "I'm going to the hospital. Something could go wrong and if we do it here, both of us will die."

"Nothing is going to go wrong. The Obstetrician keeps telling you that everything that keeps happening is normal. You call her for every little thing the past few months."

"I'm sorry that I'm worried about my child!" I snap, "His or her father, Aunt, and Uncle are dead! They'll never meet my baby!" Then the thought starts to make me cry. That Steve and Gabi never got to get married or have kids and will never meet their niece or nephew. That Bucky and I will never get married and he'll never meet his child. The baby is all that is left of him. They could never even look for his or Gabi's bodies.

"Jess…" Peggy says, "Do you want to go visit them?" Lately I've gone to the cemetery a lot to visit the three of them. Of course, they buried empty coffins, but it was supposed to be symbolic.

"Yes please," I say, drying my eyes with a tissue, "Can we go after dinner?"

"Of course," she tells me. She fills both of our plates and sets them on the table. I wobble over and sit down in my seat, picking at my dinner.

"You need to eat," Peggy says, "You need your strength. You're almost done. Then there's the hard part, and 18 years of the hardest part."

"Sounds like quite the adventure," I laugh, "I thought the hardest part was when they move out and you're all alone again. Especially because I'm a single mom."

"Don't give up hope," she says, "I'm sure you'll find someone. Maybe a single dad. You can raise your kids together."

"Hey, maybe if the baby is a girl, I'll name her Hope. It's a pretty name."

"Yes, it is. And very symbolic of your journey. Hope is the most important thing in the world. You remember the story of Pandora's Jar, right?"

"Yeah," I smile. Most people think it's Pandora's Box, but it is really a pithos, which was like a jar. Somehow the story got changed and it became a box. I look down, "You better be a girl," I joke, "I don't think I can think of a better name."

"What if it is a boy?" she asks me, "What are you going to do?"

"I'll think of a name. I've been going through a list of fictional characters for names. I used to love the name Lily, but it just doesn't seem right. I used to like Ian, too, but I don't anymore. I never thought baby naming would be this hard."

"You'll think of one."

We finish dinner and Peggy washes the dishes. We have it set up so we rotate who cooks and who cleans. I'm not really original with my meals, so usually my disk involves chicken or pasta. Peggy, on the other hand, comes up with some pretty interesting (and tasty) food.

"Can we go visit now?" I ask once she finishes up with the dishes.

"Yes. Put on your coat, though. It's a little chilly tonight and you don't want to get sick."

"I know. That wouldn't be good for any of us," I smiled and go to the hall closet. I pull my coat on and put my shoes on as Peggy does the same. We leave the apartment and I notice that she was right about it being a little chilly. The wind is blowing pretty hard. I stand on the sidewalk and hail a taxi cab. I climb in the back seat and Peggy goes around to the other side. I tell him to take us to the cemetery.

We don't talk on the way there. We never do. The ride is where I usually try to emotionally prepare myself for the visit. Of course, no matter what, I always cry.

When the cab arrives, Peggy pays the driver and we walk into the cemetery side by side, giving each other strength. I don't really need to think about where I'm going, my feet just carry me in the right direction. With a bit of an effort, I sit down in front of his grave. My fingers trace over the letters.

"Hey Bucky. I'm back. Of course, you can probably tell," I laugh, "I miss you so much," my eyes start to water, "Our baby is getting so big. Won't be long before I get to meet her. Or him. I don't know which one I want. I guess I just want the baby to be okay. Isn't that cliche? But it seems so true. I wish you could meet your baby. But you never will. But I'll tell him or her all about you, Bucky. I'm not sure I want to get back home, even if I could. Somehow, I think I'm stuck here. I just wish I could see you one more time. You aren't even actually here. I have nothing left of you. Except the baby, of course. But I don't if that really counts." I sit in front of his gave, staring at the words until it gets dark.

"Jess, we need to go home," Peggy says. She gives me my space when she visits. She always goes over to Steve and Gabi's side by side graves. That was her influence. They were engaged, after all. It is only right that they stay next to each other, even though they never got to get married or start their own family. The thought made me start crying again.

"Jess, I know you don't want to leave, but it's late and you need rest."

"I know. I was just thinking about how Gabi and Steve never got to get married and Gabi never got to have kids like she always wanted. It's just not fair."

"I know, but life is hardly fair and neither is war," she says, "You just have to remember that they love you and they wish they could be here too."

"Thanks," I wipe my eyes, "You always know the right thing to say. You're a good friend." She pulls me into a hug, which isn't the easiest thing to do right now.

We find another cab to take us home. I walk up to my apartment with Peggy behind me. I unlock the door and open it, stepping into the apartment. Peggy closes the door behind us and I hear her lock the door.

"Well, good night," I say.

"Good night," she walks into her room to change her clothes as I walk into the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. Then I head into my room and she goes into the bathroom. I change out of my dress and into my pajamas and then crawl into bed. I close my eyes and quickly drift off into sleep.

The baby is born exactly a month later. Peggy had moved out a week after I told her about the apartment, but you wouldn't really know that because she still came to check on me quite a bit. She and her now fiance set up a nursery for the baby in Peggy's old room. I was glad for all the help I was getting. Moving was getting to be quite hard at that point.

I went into labor in the early afternoon and had no way to contact Peggy. I really missed cell phones. They made life so much easier. So, instead I wrote her a quick note, grabbed my bag and, got a cab to the hospital. I checked myself in and they brought me into a sterile white room on the labor and delivery floor.

The next few hours felt like I was in literal hell. Imagine all the pain you've ever felt in your life. Then multiply that by a million. You still aren't even close to what it feels like to have a baby.

After what seems like an eternity of pain, the room is suddenly filled with crying, and it's not mine, either. My eyes start to water as I listen to the sound of the baby crying.

"Is the baby okay?" I ask the doctor. I can't see anything. I hope crying is a good sign. I try to remember all the child development classes I took back in high school, but I can't focus on much of anything.

"He's fine," the doctor says, "Congratulations. You have a healthy little boy." A boy? I smile and wonder briefly what he looks like, but I don't have much time to do that because a nurse sets him in my arms and I stare at his tiny face. He has a mop of little blond curls like I did as a baby, but the rest of his face is all Bucky. He doesn't look anything like me, which I'm completely fine with.

"Hi buddy," I smile as I talk softly to him, "I'm your mommy. I'm going to take good care of you, okay?" I turn my head as the door opens and Peggy hurries in.

"I'm so sorry I missed it," she says, catching her breath, "I had to work late. I got here as soon as I could."

"It's alright. You probably didn't want to see it anyways," I say, "It was not pleasant. Meet my son. Doesn't he look just like his daddy?" Peggy walks over and stands beside me, studying the newborn's face.

"Wow, he does look like Bucky," she says, "Has he opened his eyes yet?"

"No, but it doesn't really matter. Most babies are born with blue eyes. They don't change until they are a little older." However, as I talk, his eyelids flutter and he opens his big, blue eyes. They match Bucky's almost perfectly and I get the feeling that they are going to stay blue. They aren't the normal blue color that most newborns have. They are the deep blue that I fell in love with months ago.

"Wow," Peggy said, "I'm glad I got to see that. Have you thought of a name for him yet?"

"Yes, I have," I say, "Tobias Steven James Barnes. I couldn't decide on who to use as a middle name, so I picked both. And I just know that is his name."

"Well, I think it's wonderful," she smiles, "Here, the doctor left you the papers to fill out. Do you mind if I quickly go down to the cafeteria and get something to eat?"

"No, go ahead," I say, "Take your time."

"Thanks," she says, "I'll be back up after I eat." She gets up and leaves my room.

While she's gone, I feed Tobias and rock him to sleep, telling him from the beginning of how I met Gabi. I talk until his blue eyes are shut and I know he's asleep. I make a mental note of where I left off so I can continue later. Suddenly, my room gets very bright. I shut my eyes and wait for it to dim. When I open them, a woman is standing in my room. I've never seen her before. She has short brown hair and is dressed in navy blue, almost black.

"Jessica Arnold?" she asks. I notice she has a high tech baby carrier beside her. Why is she here? Is she going to take my baby away?

"Yes?" I reply, holding Tobias a little bit closer, "May I help you?"

"My name is Agent Maria Hill of SHIELD. I'm here to take you and your son home."


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey Guys. There was a problem with this chapter. I'm thinking my old laptop realized I was getting a new one and got mad at me. Go, I reposted this chapter.**

 **Shoutout: WaterGirl15 for being an awesome cowriter**

 **Warnings: I don't think there are any for this chapter**

 **Disclaimer: I have no legal rights to Marvel stuff**

"What?" I ask the woman standing in front of me.

"I'm taking you home," she repeated, "We had to wait until your son was born before we brought you back. Now, you can come with me."

"I'm going home?" I ask, a smile appearing on my face, "I get to see my family again?"

"Yes," she says, taking my son from my arms and setting him into the carrier on the ground, "This will keep him safe. Time travel is a little dangerous, but we can't wait any longer to pull you out."

"How long have I been missing from my time?" I frown.

"Only nine months have passed since you disappeared," she says, "We pull your friend Gabi back into our time a week after she disappeared. We wanted to bring you back together, but when she fell, we pulled her out because of course you guys weren't going to be together again."

"Gabi's alive? How did she survive that fall? Did Bucky…?"

"Yes, Gabi's alive. She's actually an agent now and she's been reunited with her brother that she never knew about. She's alive because of what Hydra did. As for Sergeant Barnes, we couldn't find him. We looked, but Gabi was the priority."

"So he really is dead," I want to cry, but I know better.

"Right now, he might not be. We didn't find his body, so maybe someone found it first. Of course, that's probably not very good. However, I doubt he's still alive in our time."

"Why didn't Gabi come to rescue me if she's an agent?"

"Because she's on a mission with Captain America and Agent Romanoff," Maria tells me.

"Wait, Steve is still alive?" I ask, "How? He flew his plane into the arctic."

"Yes, and his body froze, but he didn't die. We found him a few years back and unfroze him. Do you remember the Battle of New York?"

"I didn't until I saw the drawings in Gabi's journal. I didn't think it was the same Captain America, though."

"Well, it is Steve," she says, helping me out of bed, "We need to go now. Your friend will be back soon and we need to be gone before she is."

"But why?" I ask her, "Can't I tell her I'm going home."

"She's one of the founders of SHIELD, but she needs to figure it out herself," Maria hands me the baby carrier and I pull my bag onto the floor. Maria takes my hand, presses a button on her watch, and the light engulfs us.

When the light fades, I'm in some sort of infirmary. There is top of the line modern medical equipment. I'm not longer in my hospital gown, but instead in my _Harry Potter_ graphic tee. I touch my Lightwood ring and my two necklaces and smile. Everything is back to normal… well, almost. I go to pick up my son, but he's already in the arms of a nurse.

"Please lay down, Miss Arnold. Get some sleep. We'll check over Tobias and give him his first shots," an attractive male doctor says. I kiss Tobias's little head and then lay on one of the beds and close my eyes. I have no idea how tired I was until I lay down and sleep washes over me like a wave. My last thought is that I hope I can trust these people.

When I wake up, I immediately think of my son, but I don't have to very long. I can hear him crying and a male voice trying to calm him.

"Give him to me," I say, sitting up. A tall blond male in a sleeveless SHIELD uniform places the baby in my arms.

"Guess I'm losing my touch," he says, "I'm Agent Clint Barton of SHIELD. I'm here to take you to your new house and answer any of your questions over the next 24 hours."

"I don't need to be babysat," I tell him, "Wait, Barton? You're Gabi's brother?"

"The one and only.. Well, not really. We have another brother. But I'm the only SHIELD agent brother. Anyways, the doc cleared you and your son. Apparently you have a beautiful and healthy baby boy."

"Well, he looks like his handsome father," I tell him, rocking my son, who immediately calms down for me, "Let's go, Agent. Do you have a car seat?"

"The one Hill gave you is yours to keep, Miss Arnold."

"Okay. And please Call me Jessica or Jess. Otherwise this is going to be a long 24 hours, Agent."

"My name isn't Agent. It's Clint. And this will be a long 24 hours you don't call me by my name."

"Sorry. Let's agree to call each other the correct names, okay?"

"Alright," he say and I stand up. He sets the carrier on the bed and I set my son into it and secure him, "Lead the way, Clint."

"Follow me," he says and we navigate through the building and to a parking garage. He leads me to a black car and opens the back door. I set the carrier into the car.

"You should turn the carrier so he's facing the seat behind him. It's safer for him when he;s like that."

"What do you know about baby safety?" I ask him, but turn Tobias's carrier around anyways, knowing I've read the same thing somewhere.

"More than you, apparently," he says.

"Hey! I've had a baby for a day and there wasn't much information on it in the 40's. So I'm sorry I'm not an expert!" I exclaim as I get frustrated, trying to get the seat belt through the carrier to buckle him in. Clint takes it from me and does it in about .3 seconds.

"How…?" Then the realization hits, "You have a kid. That's why you were assigned to help me."

"I have two. A boy and a girl. And I'd appreciate you keep that quiet. Most people don't know and I'd like to keep it that way and keep my family safe." He shut the door and walked around the car and got into the driver's seat. I got into the passenger side as the car starts. I shut my door and buckle up and then we pull out of the garage and end up in downstate New York.

"I've been here before… We're near New York City. Do I get to live there?"

"Yes. We have the apartment move in ready and your mother is going to visit for the weekend once I leave. It's one of the higher end apartments, but because of what happened, SHIELD is paying your rent. There are a couple guest rooms, or you can turn them into craft rooms. We talked to your mom and used what she said to make the house feel like home."

"Does she know about the baby or where I was?" I ask Clint as we drive past lots of empty fields.

"No. We told her you were captured, but you were rescued by some people in a small village in South America and you've been living there. It's best you stick to that story. You can make up a story about falling in love or something."  
"Why did we get send back in time anyways?" I ask him.

"An invention decided to send you back in time. I have no idea why, sorry. But SHIELD is really sorry about it, so you'll have a pretty easy life in the future. You can go back to college here in the city if you want."

"That'll be a little hard with a baby," I say.

"Or you can get a job at SHIELD," he says, "It's your choice. Of course, you need to relax and recuperate for a while, first. You've been through a lot."

"Yeah, I did just have a baby," I say, "But that's a good thing."

"That's not what I meant." Which, I already knew. But I didn't want to have a deep and meaningful conversation.

It takes us a while to get to the city and even longer to get to my new apartment building. I pull my backpack onto my back and then go to the backseat and undo the baby carrier from the car and lift it up. Clint pulls an envelope from his pocket and hands it to me.

"What's this?" I ask him.

"Your keys. There are three copies of the key to the apartment, one for the mail, and another for the firesafe in the apartment." I take the envelope of keys and stick it into my pocket and walk into the building. There is doorman who greets us as we walk to the elevator.

"Third floor," Clint says and presses the button. Elevator music plays as we ascend what seems way higher than three floors before the doors click and open. I walk out into the hall and Clint heads the way down the hall to my apartment and opens the door. I walk in and suddenly the word apartment doesn't seem quite right. There is a kitchen, a living room, and a short hall that I'm assuming leads to a bedroom. However, there are also stairs.

"Your rooms are on the second level. Once we put him in his room, I'll show you around," he tells me and we climb the stairs to the apartment's second level. He walks down the hall to a door with 'Tobias' written on it. I push open the door and am speechless. The room is a light green color, but the decor makes it look like it came straight from a magazine. The furniture was white and and elegant On one wall sat the crib and on the opposite wall there was a comfy looking chair and book shelf. The wall opposite the door had a dresser and a changing table. The wall with the door had a large storage type thing with a bunch of square cubbies. There were assorted stuffed animals throughout the room.

"Wow. This is amazing," I am in awe as I walk over the the crib and lay Tobias, who is asleep, in the crib. I notice the turtles on the wall and smile.

"We have an agent whose sister and brother in law are designers. They are responsible for the furnishings of the apartment."

"I'll have to thank them," I smile, "Can I have the grand tour?"

"You most certainly can," he leads me back down to the first floor, "This is the kitchen. It's fully stocked and has the latest appliances. The tv in the living room has about 1,000 channels and the movie channels. Plus, you have a lot of movies in the cabinets in the entertainment center. There is a blueray player and you have netflix hooked up, so no matter what, you have something to watch." I opened up the cabinet and my eyes widened at the large collection of movies.

"Wow. That is a lot of movies," I say, "Where to next?"

"This way," Clint says, leading me down the short hall to what I assumed earlier was a bedroom, but we ended up in what could have been a bedroom, but the four walls were lined with bookshelves and posters from my room at home

"We had your mother send us your collection of books and we filled in any missing ones that you never actually owned, plus we had a book drive. Everyone knows about you, by the way. Lots of agents want to meet you. Not many people will ever time travel. SHIELD actually destroyed the device after Maria pulled you out because they didn't want anyone meddling with time."

"I can't believe you did all of this stuff for me, just because of an accident that actually improved my life."

"Well, you also missed a lot of stuff while you were gone and you never were meant to be there in the first place. SHIELD just wants you to be happy and have an easy life after all we saw you go through."

"Saw?" I ask, "You watched it all? Why didn't you interfere earlier."

"Yes, we could see everything once the machine worked again. We couldn't do anything because we were afraid we'd screw up time a lot worse. We had to let it play out," he explains, leading me up the stairs and across from Tobias's room. The room is light purple - my favorite color. The king sized bed has a blue comforter and my favorite blankets from home as well as my old body pillow. I smile, thinking this place already feels like home. I'm going to love it here. I open a door and find the master bathroom connected to my room. The bathroom is ocean themed - it looks like it's completely underwater with white appliances and fish painted on the walls. The bathtub is huge, almost looking more like a hot tub than a bathtub. I notice another door that opens back up to the hall.

"How many more rooms are there in this place? Is there another smaller bathroom?" I ask him.

"Sorry this is the only one."

"That's fine. This one is big enough as is. I love this place," I smile, "You can thank SHIELD for me."

"Of course." I leave the room and walk back into my son's room to check on him. He's still fast asleep, of course, so I stand there for a few seconds, watching him.

"He's so cute," I smile, "Were yours this small?"

"Yea, he was, Lila is still tiny."

"How old is she? Maybe they can end up as playmates. That would be cute."

"They could but Lila is four almost five."

"Well, when they're a little older, then," I say, "What's your other brother like?"

"Well...I actually haven't seen him since I was in the circus which was years ago. Last I heard he is the ring leader of the same circus we were apart of."

"You were in the circus? That's awesome! How did that happen? What did you do in the circus? Was it fun?"

"Yea it was, I was there for a few years until SHIELD found me. It was right after we escaped foster care when Gabi was about five."

"Was she in the circus with you?" I frown, "She doesn't talk about the past much."

"No," Clint face darkens, "She was raised by Hydra until Coulson took her in around the age of sixteen."

"Wait, Hydra? I thought they took out Hydra after World War 2?"

"There was a very small division who went to work for the Soviets after the war. They kept the name though, the ghost found her after we lost sight of her."

"What name? And what ghost?" I ask, his replies giving me more questions than answers.

"Hydra and they call him the Winter Soldier, no one really know anything about him."

"The Winter Soldier? That's an odd codename. Is he dangerous? I mean, he wouldn't come after me, would he?"

"You're fine, he hasn't attacked anyone since before Gabi joined SHIELD."

"Oh, well, that's a good thing, right? Maybe he's gone," I say, grabbing the baby monitor and leaving my son's room. I walk back down into the living room and sit down on the sofa, "So, why does SHIELD think I need a bodyguard, then?"

Clint walks in looking at his cell phone smirking, "Fury is just a paranoid person, maybe after what happened to Missy he may want to make sure nothing happens to you."

"Missy? And why are you smirking at your phone? Are you texting your wife?"

"Missy is Gabi's nickname and no Gabi just texted me."

"Gabi texted you? What did she say? Is she going to visit?"

"She said that the mission was a success and her fiance is an idiot for jumping out of the plane without a parachute. She is heading to their apartment which is in DC before their trip tomorrow."

"Trip?" I ask, "Where are they going? Or is it classified?"

"They're going to see Peggy Carter, they haven't seen her in a while. Not since Gabi had her shoulder reconstructed."

"Peggy? She's still alive? She's got to be in her 90's now. I should visit. Or at least have Gabi tell her that I'm okay and the baby is okay."

"She already knows, Sharon Carter told her everything. Besides she knew about you two long before the incident since she visited the base when Gabi was first saved."

"Who? And how?"

"Seeing a fifteen year old Gabrielle knowing the 20 year old Gabrielle she put two and two together and Sharon is Peggy's great-granddaughter."

"How did she know about me, though?"

"We're SHIELD, we find out everything."

"That's a little creepy," I say, "Are you guys going to be watching me for the rest of my life?"

"Nah, Fury only kept an eye on you after you turned 19."

"But why would you watch me before the time travel incident? I'm not a threat? Is it because of Gabi?"

"Yes it is, they didn't know if Gabi would turn and attack you or anyone else."

"So you guys have been like my own personal guardian angels for past past several years."

Clint nods his head.

My 24 hours with Clint pass by quickly, but I learn quite a lot about him and know I can trust him. It seems like my life is going to be (reasonably) calm now. I have a nice appartment with people making sure I'm safe. I have a perfect little baby boy who I love so much. I'm going to see my best friend again soon enough? What could be better than that?


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey guys! I'm posting this chapter from my awesome new laptop. :) Shoutout to WaterGirl15 for being awesome and cowriting with me.**

 **Warnings: Language and a bit sexual. Also, be prepared to fangirl.**

 **Disclaimer: Don't own Marvel or Disney**

I'm really excited. I've been living in my amazing apartment for about a week and a half, and I'm slowly adjusting it. Today, however, is a special day. Gabi and Steve are finally coming to visit. I do one last check of the apartment and then settle down with a book on the couch with Tobias nearby, asleep in a cute little bassinet, and wait for my friends to show up. About five minutes later, the doorbell rings.

"Hello," I smile, opening up the door.

"Hi Jessica," Gabi smiles, but something is off.

"Come on in," I say. I can read her like a book. I can tell something is wrong.

Steve and Gabi walk into the apartment and Gabi is limping a bit.

"Have a seat," I say, "Can I get you anything?"

"We're fine," Steve says.

"So, what's wrong?" I ask, "And don't tell me 'nothing.' Gabi's limping, and you guys look like you both just watched a marathon of all the horror movies ever made."

Gabi sighs and runs her hand through her hair.

"We had a bad mission, Steve just got out of the hospital yesterday," Gabi says.

"You guys could have postponed your visit. I'm not going anywhere," I tell them, "Why would I? This place is amazing."

"Well...SHIELD no longer exists."

"What? That doesn't make any sense," I say, "How can an agency just stop existing? Although, you probably can't tell me, can you?"

"No, we can since we don't have anyone to stop us," Steve says, "It was Hydra, they were growing inside of SHIELD and Bu - the Winter Soldier attacked us."

"Clint was telling me about that guy," I say, "He sounds really creepy."

Gabi gulps and looks down.

"But let's focus on the real reason you're here," I smile, "I'm so glad to see you. How's Peggy doing? Clint said you guys were visiting her."

"She's fine, having trouble remembering things," Gabi says looking at me.

"Oh," I say, "that's sad. It's an evil disease. My grandmother has it. Maybe I can go see her some time. Easier said than done now, though."

"I...I don't think traveling is the best idea Jessica," Steve says.

"Why?" I ask, glancing towards where my son is, "Is someone after me?"

"No, its just...Bucky isn't himself and he may end up hurting you."

"Bucky?" I frown, "What are you talking about? He died years ago."

"Yea, so did I," Gabi says, "I knew the entire time what happened to Bucky, he helped raise me after all."

"He's not dead and he's coming after me to hurt me and you think I should just stay put? What if he finds me? What about my son? We're not safe here!"

"Jessica calm down, he was in Washington DC and he has no idea that you are here. Fury made sure that there was no info on you or where you are," Steve tells me.

"Shouldn't I move to Canada or something? If he knows Gabi is here, then I'm sure he can figure out I made it back. Wouldn't he come back to the city first?"

"He doesn't remember anything, he didn't even recognize us." The room suddenly got louder as crying echos.

"The acoustics in this place aren't the best," I sigh, picking up my son, "I'm sorry."

"It's ok," Gabi smiles.

"Hey, it's okay, buddy," I say, "There are people here to see you." He calms down slowly, hearing my voice.

"Would you like to hold him?" I ask Gabi.

"Sure." I gently place the little boy into her arms.

"Tobias, this is your aunt Gabi and uncle Steve. Guys, meet Tobias."

"Hello Tobias," Gabi coos.

"He looks exactly like him," I say, "It's a little scary sometimes. So, are you guys still going to get married?"

"Yes we are," Steve smiles, "We are planning the wedding soon."

"Do you have a date in mind?" I ask them, "I'd love to be there."

"We aren't sure yet, we still have to look at dates and where we are going to have it."

"Well, I'm happy for you. If anyone deserves to happy, it's you two. You're great together."

"Thank you Jessica."

"You guys are welcome to stay the night here. There is a spare room," I say, "If you're okay with sharing."

"Thanks but we have to leave to get Sam before we move into Stark Tower tomorrow," Gabi says.

"Well, try to remember to visit from time to time, okay? I've got my hands full, so I may not have a lot of time, but company that does something more than cry is nice."

"Of course we will do our best," Gabi says handing me Tobias.

"It's been nice seeing you," I smile, "I was afraid I'd never see you again after everything that happened."

"Me too, I'm glad we both are back and are happy."

"I'll see you around," I give her a hug.

Soon Steve and Gabi leave my apartment leaving me alone with my son.

I finally leave the house with Tobias a few days later to avoid losing my mind. I go visit Central Park, which is one of my old favorite hangouts. I was thought it would be peaceful, but apparently once you have a kid, people feel the need to ask a ton of questions, which got annoying very quickly. So, I leave the park, and end up someplace familiar that I visited often in 1944 and 1945 before Tobias was born. The cemetery where my friends were 'buried.' Of course, I've known since I got here that Gabi and Steve were alive, but I learned days ago that he was still alive. The good news was that he doesn't remember me, so even though he's dangerous, he can't hurt us.

I find my way over to where his grave is. The Winter Soldier may be alive, but Bucky is dead, so I know better than to act any different. I sit down in front of his grave and settle Tobias into my arms.

"Hi Bucky. I found my way back home. I wish I had been able to visit sooner, but I've been busy. I saw Gabi and Steve a few days ago, but they're different now. I feel alone again. I met a SHIELD agent named Clint. He's really nice, but he's busy, though. I wish I had someone to talk to. Well, someone that'll talk back to me. I can talk to Tobias here all I want, but he doesn't understand, obviously. I think you'd like him, Bucky. I hope he's like you when he's older."

"Bucky," I say, shifting Tobias so he's facing the stone, "This is Tobias. Tobias, this is your daddy. I'm sure he'd love you as much as I do."

After I say that I hear something fall and land on the ground with a thud. I turn around and stand up to look for the source of the noise. There I see a man with long brown hair a baseball cap next to him near the tree.

"Sir? Are you okay?" I call, "Do you need me to call for help?"

He looks at me and tries to move away from me.

"Is something wrong?" I ask him.

He stands up and his hair moves so I can see his face. I'd recognize that face anywhere. I've been looking at a smaller version of it for a few weeks now. I back away from him, panicking. He's found me. They told me he wouldn't. Now I was dead. But something was off, he looks scared of me. I pull my son closer to my body and back further away from him.

"Jessica...please I'm sorry...I don't want to hurt you or...o...our son. Please stay away," Bucky says.

"He's not your son," I snap, "He's Bucky's son. Stay away from us."

All he does is nod and begins to walk away from us. I stand there, unable to move from where I'm standing, like me feet are frozen. He asked me to stay away from him, but from what Steve and Gabi said he doesn't remember us.

"How do you know my name?" I ask quietly.

"I haven't forgotten, you're the only one they could not make me forget," he answers.

"Gabi and Steve said you didn't remember anything."

"At first I didn't, but without the constant mind wiping I am slowly remembering who I am and who I care for."

"I don't know what you want me to do," I say, "Maybe we should just forget this happened."

"I'm just glad you are safe. I want all of you to be safe."

"Who's keeping you safe, then?" I take a step towards him.

"I will be fine on my own, I have to figure more out and pay for what I had done."

"You didn't do anything," I take a few more steps towards him, "That was Hydra, not you. You wouldn't hurt anyone."

"At least I did one thing right, making sure Gabrielle could handle herself and was with her instead of killing her like my superiors wanted me to."

"See? You're not a bad person."

"Maybe, but I want you to be safe and happy. I do not want to hurt you."

"You're not going to hurt me," I am not only a few feet away from him, "You could never hurt me."

He looks at me worried but I can see he really wants to be with me again. I shift on my feet, and absentmindedly readjust my son.

"Why did you come back to New York?"

"I wanted to reconnect with the past, I had no idea I would find you here."

"I've only been back for a few weeks. They set me up in an apartment. It's a little lonely, though. I spent all the time in the 1940's wanting to come home, but now nothing is the same."

"I'm sorry Jessica."

"It's not like it's your fault that things changed."

He slowly moves closer but stops short. I don't push it. I just stay where I am an watch him like he's a skittish horse. I had to let him come to me. I've gotten a lot more patient recently. I see his eyes go from me to Tobias.

"I can go set him in his carrier," I say, "I'm sure this is a lot to take in."

"N-no it's alright, he's just...perfect...like his mother."

"He looks like you, not me," I say, "I'm far from perfect, trust me."

"You're perfect to me Jessica," he says walking a little closer. I blush and look down at Tobias. Bucky has always been really good at making me blush.

"I love you Jessica."

"I l..l… love you too."

"I missed you so much," he says standing right in front of me.

"I missed you too," I say, "Did you really never forget me?"

"I couldn't, I always thought of you. Even on my missions, raising Gabrielle, anything you would pop into my head."

"We hardly got to spend any time together," I say, "You hardly knew me. I wouldn't let you know me. So why did you think about me so much?"

"You kept me grounded, I don't know. You were just there." Suddenly, it started to rain, hard.

"Do you have a place to go?" I ask him as I walk back over to Tobias's carrier and strap him in.

"No, I have been sleeping anywhere I can find. Mostly abandoned buildings."

"Come with me. There's an extra room in my apartment," I say, "You're welcome to stay with me."

"But what if I hurt you or your son?"

"You're not going to hurt us. You said yourself that you never forgot me, You wouldn't hurt my… your.. our son."

Bucky soon nods his head in agreement.

"Follow me, then," I say, working my way towards the street. The rain doesn't bother me, but I don't want Tobias to get sick.

That's when I felt something drape over me to shield me and Tobias. I look up to see Bucky had covered me with his coat.

"Buck, I don't want you to get sick," I say.

"I'll be fine," He says, "I can't get sick easily." I notice something and my eyes widen.

"B…B...Bucky….," I stutter, "What happened? Your arm…"

"It was from the fall, I landed on my arm losing most of it. They replaced it with this metal one."

"That must have hurt," I say, "Why didn't it kill you? It doesn't make any sense."

"Gabrielle and I survived because of what Hydra did to us in the factory. Zola turned us both into super soldiers."

"Like Steve?" I ask as we walk along. Luckily my apartment isn't far and we get into the building right before the thunder and lightning start. I force myself to stay calm. I'm 22 and have a baby. It's ridiculous for me to be afraid of thunder. I've been the past and back. A noise can't hurt me, but I'm still startled.

"Yes like Steve," Bucky says helping me get inside. I walk to the elevator and hit the up arrow and step into the elevator. Bucky follows behind me as the door close. I press the 3 button and the elevator slides upwards. The ride is quiet until we get to the third floor. The doors click open and I walk down the hall and stop in front of my door.

"Here, take him while I get my keys out," I hand the carrier to him before he says anything and dig my keys out and unlock the door, stepping into my apartment.

I look back to see Bucky staring at Tobias with a sort of prideful and happy look on his face. Tobias is staring back up at Bucky with the exact same blue eyes. I smile a little watching them.

"Buck, the door is open now. He's not going to disappear," I say.

"O-oh right," Bucky says walking in. I take the carrier back from him and set it on the ground and Tobias up out of it.

"Hold out your arms," I tell Bucky. Bucky holds out his arms carefully. I gently set Tobias in his arms, but watch the pair of them carefully, just in case I need to intervene.

Bucky looks down at Tobias and carefully holds him close. Tobias yawns and shuts his big blue eyes, falling asleep.

"He likes you," I whisper.

Bucky smiles at Tobias.

"Come on, I'll show you his room," I say walking towards the stairs, "You know, he usually will only fall asleep if he's in my arms."

"He does?" Bucky whispers following me. I nod walk down the hall on the second floor and open up the door to Tobias's room. Over his crib, are his initials: TSJB.

"I love his room," I smile, "It's so pretty in here."

"TSJB?" Bucky asks walking over to the crib.

"Tobias Steven James Barnes," I explain, taking him from Bucky and laying him down. He moves a little bit, but then is still other than the rise and fall of his tiny chest.

"You named him after Steve and I?"

"Well, you're his father, but I thought if you were around, you'd want his middle name to be Steven. It bothered me for days until I decided that I was having a son, I'd use both for middle names."

"Thank you Jessica."

"It's no big deal," I say, leaving the room, "Are you hungry?"

"A little yea," Bucky says following me and quietly closes the door after grabbing the baby monitor.

"What would you like?" I ask, walking back down to the kitchen.

"Anything is fine." Since I'm still pretty tired, I elect to just simply make spaghetti. It doesn't take long or require a huge amount of effort.

Once I finish, I take the two bowls into the living room and hand one to Bucky and settle down on the couch and enjoy my dinner. I flip on the television and elect to watch reruns of _The Big Bang Theory_. I've seen every episode more times than I can count, but something about the show just calms me down.

"So, how long have you had your memories back?" I ask him, "You don't have to answer that if you don't want to."

"I don't mind, its only been a few days."

"Sorry about the food. I'm not the best cook in the world, but I'm learning. Some day Toby's gonna care if I feed him burnt noodles or something."

"No, its fine. Toby has an amazing mother and I hope I can earn your trust back after leaving you."

"You didn't leave me by choice," I say, "I'm not mad at you. I know you would have rather been with us. And I do trust you. I wouldn't have let you come here and hold Toby if I didn't."

Bucky gives me that smile I loved to see.

Once we finish eating, I take out bowls and put them into the dishwasher and clean up the kitchen. Then, I rejoin him on the couch, where he is engulfed by the show on television. I only relax for a minute before sound comes through the baby monitor. I sigh.

"Is it too much to ask for five minutes of relaxation?" I pull myself to my feet and head towards the stairs.

"Jess, I can handle it," Bucky says, "You should relax."

"No, I've got him, really. I'm used to it," I call, heading up the stairs.

I hear Bucky sigh as I walk into Toby's room and pick him up.

"Hi Sleepyhead. Did you enjoy your nap?" I ask him. I walk back down the stairs and into the the living room. Bucky looks over at us and smiles as I sit down on the couch. I smile back as I settle on the couch with Tobias in my arms. Anyone could mistake the three of us for a normal family, but I know, Bucky knows, and one day, Toby will know that this is not the case, and no matter how much I want a normal life and family, it'll never really happen.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi guys! Have another chapter. Also, if you like my writing, check out my new story, Avengers in Disney.**

 **Disclaimer: Not mine**

 **Warnings: Angst and language**

It takes me a few days to adjust to not living alone (not counting Toby.) Plus, it also takes me a while to get used to Bucky. He's definitely not the man I knew before. Of course, I didn't expect him to be normal after everything he went through. However, nothing had gone wrong. I hadn't told anyone that Bucky was here. I know I should have, but I also know that he needs time.

Early one morning, around 8 am, the doorbell rang.

"I got it," Bucky calls from the kitchen.

"No, don't answer that," I say, "Can you go check on Toby?"

"Sure," Bucky heads to Toby's room.

"Hello?" I ask, answering the door.

"Hey Jess," Gabi smiles.

"What are you doing here?" I ask her, "It's been a while."

"I wanted to talk to you, it's about the wedding."

"What about it? Do you want to get lunch later and talk about it?" I ask.

"It's 8 am Jess, a little too early for lunch."

"I meant at like noon or something. I don't really have time to talk right now. Mornings are a little complicated and Toby's being fussy this morning."

"Toby, no pulling on my hair, сын," I hear Bucky say and Gabi hears it too.

"Oh, that's just a neighbor. He loves to help out with Toby," I lie, "He and his partner love kids. They want their own some day."

"Jessica," Gabi says seriously. Damn I forgot that she knows when I am lying.

"What?" I ask, "Look, I really need to go take care of my son. I'll see you later. We can have lunch at that cute little diner down the road. The one with the good milkshakes."

"Баки, я знаю, что вы там!" Gabi calls in Russian ignoring me and easily walks into the apartment.

"Hey! Get out of my apartment! I don't have time for this."

"Shadow? Что ты здесь делаешь?" Bucky asks walking up with Toby in his arms.

"Я пришел, чтобы поговорить с Джесс, я не знаю, что вы были здесь. Ты в порядке?" Gabi says.

"Can we please pick a language I can understand?" I pull my son into my arms, "Or better yet, everyone just leave me alone? I'm just trying to raise my son and everyone keeps bothering me."

"Dang Jess calm down, I'm not going to hurt anyone or anything," Gabi says, "I'm just surprised Bucky is here is all."

"Yeah, well, he found out about Toby. I couldn't leave him in the streets."

"I wouldn't want you to, he is Toby's father after all. I'm just glad my spell worked."

"Spell?" I ask her, "What are you talking about?"

"Well...um...I guess Clint didn't tell you."

"He didn't tell me a lot of things, I'm sure," I say, "He was only here a day to make sure I was comfortable."

"Well I guess you know that he is my older brother. But well...Bucky here raised me and knows what Hydra did to me while I was with them for eleven years."

"What?" I ask, "How is that possible? Did you know as soon as you met him in 1943 that he was the same guy? He says he never forgot me. Did you know about me before I even met you?"

"I didn't know about you, but some of his memories would come back while I was training under him. When I first got my powers I practiced on him making him remember one person; you."

"I need to be alone," I say. I take Toby upstairs to my room and lock us in. I thought I knew Gabi and she's been lying to me and keeping secrets since we met, that's when I remember her journal she left behind. I wish I had brought it back with me. I try to remember what she had written. It all makes sense now, though. I wonder what they're talking about, so I walk into Toby's room and grab the other monitor, knowing it's partner is downstairs.

"You never told them?" Bucky asks.

"How could I? I don't think that would have been smart. Hydra was already after me. I couldn't get Jessica involved in that. I had no idea she was your girl until after the incident."

"I'm surprised you didn't do your mission, you gave your oath to."

"When I gave that oath I was still naive and had no idea who they really were. I couldn't kill Steve knowing who he would become."

"Well, now we've both ruined our chances of redeeming ourselves to her," Bucky says.

"I know, it took Steve a while to understand everything. Luckily he understood that being a five year old when Hydra found me I would follow anyone who raises me."

"She can't do this alone," he says, "She's exhausted and Toby's not even a month old. What am I supposed to do? I don't think she even trust me."

"I'm sorry Bucky, I wish I knew what to do. Being an Avengers and the team's only sorceress I can't do much. Also I have a wedding to plan."

"I know. Everyone's so busy," he says, "Just do me a favor and keep an eye on Steve."

"I will, I just hope he stops jumping out of jets without a parachute," Gabi sighs.

"What?" Bucky asks

"Oops, I shouldn't have said that."

"I'm going to kill that punk," he says angrily.

"Hey! No killing my man." Toby starts to cry. I sigh and set the monitor back in his nursery and go downstairs into the kitchen to make him a bottle. I ignore my two friends, not having time yet to think about how I feel about this whole thing.

"I should get back to the tower, I bet Steve is worried and Sam may want to hurt him from the run this morning."

"Or just to tell everyone that I'm housing a fugitive," I mutter.

"No, I am not telling them. He has yet to heal plus the Avengers don't want him to arrest him moreover to have him join the team."

"Why don't you ask him? He can make his own choices. Maybe he wants to join your team. Seems like everyone wants to be a superhero."

"Jess, one: grow up you're a mother now. And two: having one Hydra traitor is enough on the team until we take them down for good."

"Grow up? Really? Do you have any idea how hard the past year has been on me? Wait, I can answer that: you don't. I had to go through all this baby stuff practically alone and now I have to take care of two people right now when I can barely take care of myself!"

"I know you have been listening, and you know I have been through hell as well. And you have many people who would love to help you! Even if Bucky is still healing he can help and you cannot deny him since he is the father of your child."

"Well, I didn't ask for that, now did I? And help? What help? You have only visited once before and only for five minutes. You're too busy, and honestly, I don't want to be tangled up in this whole SHIELD and Hydra thing. Is it too much to ask for to have a normal life?"

"Well excuse me for healing from my injuries. And the Avengers have been trying to get rid of Hydra so you can have a normal life and that is another reason I do not want Bucky to come with me. If he is here you two can finally have a normal life."

"Normal until Hydra comes for him! You've been back here for almost a year now, Gabi. You act like you didn't even miss me."

"They think he is gone and they doubt that they can get him back. I have been trying to keep you safe! I missed you like hell but I could not get you involved again."

"I am involved. I will always be involved because of him," I point at Bucky, "And I can't do a thing about it, like you said, because of the baby."

"Well you are the one to choose to have sex with him. Bucky is no longer involved since SHIELD fell."

"I don't even remember that night! I broke my promise to myself and I changed my life forever. And as long as Hydra is out there, I'm in danger and Toby is in danger."

"We are working on it, it isn't easy. And don't you think I broke my own promises? Everything changed for me because I never wanted to return to this life, but in order to protect the ones I care for I will stay in this life."

"Doesn't sound like a very pleasant life," I say, "Will you please stop crying?!" I offer him the bottle, but he won't take it. I sigh, "What do you want?"

Bucky slowly walks over and takes Toby and silently bounces him making him quiet down.

"Great, now even he hates me," I run my hands through my hair, which I only do when I'm frustrated, "Does anyone else want to join the club?"

"He just wanted his father," Gabi says, "Well if no one wants me here I will leave now." I don't stop her leaving. The fewer people around, the better. I wait for the door to click shut before I take Toby back.

"So, you think I can't take care of myself? That's why you're here?" I snap at him

"No, that is not why I am here. I wanted to be with you Jessica, you have been doing well on your own but you are working yourself too much."

"You really need to keep a better eye on where these things are," I say, picking up the other monitor, "I heard everything you and Gabi said."

"I know, Gabi and I have trained so much we know when others are listening. We wanted you to know."

"Know what? That you think I need help? I didn't need to know any of your Hydra stuff! They could come after me or _my_ son because of you two."

Bucky says nothing, I could see the hurt in his eyes. He sighs and goes to gather whatever he has.

"So now you're going to walk out on me? Typical. You always just leave me. Ever since we met, you make an impression and then leave. You make me care and then you get captured, making me think you were dead. Then you came back long enough to cause Toby and then left again! And now, when I need you once again, you're leaving. And here I am, trying to stop you, but knowing eventually, you will leave me."

"Trying to stop me? By saying I am putting you and our son in danger? I don't want either of you in danger. I never wanted to leave you Jessica, but being that the first few times we were in a war that is different. I did not want to almost die! I wanted to be with you, I still do. But if you feel like you will be in danger I cannot stand being the cause of that."

"Maybe we are in danger, but someone needs to protect us," I say, "I need to go think." I deposit Toby in his arms and leave the apartment, separating myself from Toby the first time since I brought him home. I walk away from the apartment and find myself in central park. I watch a family that is having a picnic. A cute little girl, around 3, is acting like a ballerina while the dad and a boy are kicking a ball back and forth. The mother is sitting on a bench, reading and watching them. They seem like a perfectly normal family and I long for my life to be like that. I was alone a lot growing up because people didn't like me in school and I had two working parents. Things changed when my parents divorced, but that was for the better. I haven't seen my father in years, which is fine by me. He always put too much on me and I couldn't handle it, but I was always such a good kid. I never did drugs or drank underage. I wasn't out partying until 3 am. I didn't get pregnant as a teen. I listened to my mom and yet I still was treated like crap by my family. I was basically a maid once I moved again from DeWitt, where my mom and I were living with my grandparents after we moved out of the house I grew up in. For a long time, it was just my mother and I, and I was happy, but I also was forced to grow up, feeling like I had to take care of my mom. I was 13 and felt like it was my job to make sure my mom was okay.

Then, when I was 14, about to turn 15, we moved to East Syracuse. Now, I was living with my mother, her boyfriend, and my brother. That's when the depression got worse. I never told anyone how I really felt, not even the therapist my dad took me to for a few months. All I did was lie to him. I always felt like my problems were my burden to carry and I didn't want to put them on anyone else. Sure, I broke a couple times, but I quickly fixed myself so people could just think I had a bad day. Did I think about ending it all? Yes. Did I ever make a plan? No. I was never brave enough or desperate enough to act on these feelings. I knew I could never do that to my mom. She found out once after I had been texting a friend after a bad argument with my brother, who always seems to know what to say to make me feel like month old garbage. Anyways, this friend, who went to a different school than me told on me for saying something that sounded suicidal, and then I had to have an awkward conversation with my counselor and tell him I didn't mean it, and of course, he called my mom. Typical.

So why is it that I'm always the one who draws the short stick? Guys never even looked at me in high school. Why would they? I'm not skinny or pretty, and I don't even try to make myself look pretty. I don't wear makeup and usually only wear jeans and a t - shirt. Even I wouldn't date me. Then, the only time I meet a guy is when I'm thrown into the past. I think he's dead like three times and end up alone, carrying his child, only to be thrusted back into my time with a newborn and then run into him again, alive. What did I do in a past life that made all this happen? I only hope my next life is better.

"How old is he?" the mother asks me.

"What?" I ask her.

"Your baby. How old. I can tell you're a new mother. I work with new mothers. You look exhausted."

"Oh, he's about a month old. Toby. I haven't been getting much sleep," I confess, "He doesn't like me to sleep."

"Single mother, then?" she asks me.

"No, he's got a father. We're just both very new at this. Right now he's watching Toby. I needed some air. I probably should get back."

"Here," she hands me a business card, "I do therapy for new mothers. It's a lot to deal with."

"Thanks," I pocket the card and stand up. I head slowly back to the apartment and into the lobby. I walk to the elevator and punch the 3 button and lean against the elevator as it rises. The doors click open and I walk down the hall to my apartment and unlock the door, stepping inside.

"Bucky? I'm home," I call.

"We're in the kitchen," Bucky calls back.

"We?" I ask, walking into the room.

"Toby is in his high chair, I was just making you a little something."

"If you make a mess, you better clean it up."

"I will, promise."

"Good," I lift up Toby, "Sorry I left. I needed to clear my head."

"It's alright, lunch will be ready soon," Bucky smiles at me.

"Alright," I say, "Did you feed him?"

"Yes I did, and he is a little fussy one."

"He's being extra fussy today for some reason," I say, "You didn't need to make lunch, you know."

"I know, but I wanted to."

"Thank you for that."

"You're welcome." I take Toby and sit on the couch, but watch Bucky in the kitchen. He seems to be turning back into his old self again.

"You know, I like the long hair," I say, "You should keep it like that."

"Really? Maybe I will."

"I know you're used to having to have it short because of the military," I say, "But you don't have to anymore."

"You're right, I don't," Bucky smiles bringing me the lunch he made me.

"Grilled cheese and soup. My favorite comfort food. You really do remember things, don't you. Otherwise you wouldn't have remembered something this insignificant."

"It's not insignificant, you always wanted this when you are stressed or upset. It's important to know."

"You're the best, you know that?" I say, "Can you take Toby so I can eat?"

"Of course," He smiles taking Toby and goes to the rug and sits down. He soon starts to play with Toby making him laugh and make baby noises. I smile at them, I'm so glad for the help and glad that the pair bonded so quickly. I love them both so much.

I think about this as I enjoy my lunch and watch the disney movie marathon on ABC Family. Snow White is on right now. I haven't seen it since I was a little girl.

"Fairy Tales are a bit silly, don't you think?"

"A bit, but they are nice to see," Bucky says as Toby tries to play with his metal arm.

"Toby, don't do that," I tell him, "Bucky, do you still have your dog tags? I mean, did you find them after everything that happened?"

"I think Steve has them, from what Gabrielle told me they found them in some of SHIELD's files."

"Huh. I wonder how that happened," I take Toby because he's still trying to play with Bucky's fake arm.

"I'm not sure."

"Just another mystery," I sigh, "I wonder if I will ever get any answers." I would eventually, and when I do, I wish I hadn't.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys! I've been a little bit busy lately (I promise it has nothing to do with YouTube or Sebastian...) Anyways, I just finished writing chapter 13. To be honest, I'm not 100% sure where this is going, but I'm going to keep writing.**

 **Shoutout: WaterGirl15 also to my best friend (Who I made read this story, so I put her in.) You know who you are.**

 **Disclaimer: Not mine**

 **Warnings: Extreme fluffyness and then angst**

"Can you believe he's almost one? And that Steve and Gabi are getting married today?" I ask Bucky as I feed Toby his breakfast. He loves peaches.

"I cannot believe Punk is finally tying the knot, he never thought he would get married and now he is getting married to the girl who is like my sister," Bucky says.

"Don't let her real brother hear you say that," I smile, "They're a good fit. No, Toby, don't spit out your food. It's not funny."

Bucky smiles at me and our son but soon sighs. He is unable to go to the wedding since the Avengers will be there and it may not be a good idea.

"You should come. Bucky, you've been hiding out here for months. Maybe it's time they know you're back. You can't hide forever."

"I know, but what if something happens?"

"What could possibly go wrong?" I ask and I wipe Toby's hands and face, then lift him into my arms. He's so big now. I can't believe how fast he grew.

"Maybe I should, Gabrielle is alone since we have traditions so I will go and call her."

"Alright," I say, "I have to go take a shower. Keep an eye on Toby. You know what happened last time," I say. He couldn't walk yet, but he was still a little troublemaker.

"Alright," He takes Toby and calls Gabi. I guess she answered since now he is speaking in Russian. I set Toby down in the playpen, but I know if he wants to, he can get out. I need to start getting ready, though. I head upstairs into the bathroom and take a quick shower, a skill I've perfected over the past several months. Then, I do my hair and put on my dress for the wedding. I walk back downstairs.

"Jess, I have to get ready," Bucky says holding Toby.

"Alright. I'll take Toby duty, then," I take Toby from him, "I have to put him in his little outfit anyways."

"Alright, I will be ready soon," he kisses my cheek and heads upstairs.

"Your daddy has been acting so weird the past few weeks," I tell Toby, once the water turns on. I walk into Toby's room and start to change him into a little tux that I got for the wedding.

"Are we going to behave today, Toby?" I ask, surprised as to how easily he lets me dress him. I bring him back downstairs and put him back into the playpen and sit down, watching him.

"Ready?" Bucky asks walking into the room dressed in his old uniform.

"When you are," I say, "Mr. Military."

He chuckles a bit and we head off to his and Steve's old church in Brooklyn where the wedding is. I go and find Gabi in the room she was waiting in.

"Hey. I know this room is girls only, but I brought a boy," I say, stepping in with Toby.

"Hi Jessica," Gabi smiles as a woman helps her with her hair.

"Who's your friend?" I ask her, looking at the redhead, but having a feeling I already know the answer to my question.

"Jess, this is Natasha, Natasha this is my friend Jessica."

"Nice to meet you, Natasha. This little guy is my son, Tobias," I smile, "I remember you from the footage of New York."

"It's nice to meet you, too Jessica, Gabrielle told me a lot about you," Natasha says still focusing on Gabi's hair.

"Well. I just thought I'd say hi. I better get back to my boyfriend," I smile saying the word. It doesn't seem like a good enough word for everything we've been though, but I'm proud to use it. I love him so much.

"Ok, we should be out soon. Can you make sure bird boy is ready?" Natasha asks.

"Clint? Where is he?" I ask them.

"He is with Tony out in the hall."

"Got it," I say, slipping out of the room. I quickly locate him and walk over, "Agent Bird Boy, your presence is requested."

Tony starts to laugh as Clint shakes his head.

"Right, thank you Jessica."

"You're Tony Stark," I say once Clint leaves.

"Yes, that is me," Tony smirks.

"Nice to meet you," I say, "I've heard a bit about you from Gabi. Is your girlfriend around? I'd like to meet her too."

"Maybe at the reception, the wedding is starting and she gets to walk down the aisle with yours truly."

"Sounds like fun. I have to find my boyfriend. I'll talk to you later," I say. I leave, looking around for Bucky.

When I find Bucky he is with Steve.

"Nice to see you, Steve," I say, "Sorry I've been monopolizing your best friend for so long."

"No, no it is alright," Steve smiles, "I'm just glad you both are here for the wedding."

"We should go get seats," I say, "We can talk later."

Steve nods and Bucky takes my arm and we head to the chapel to sit down, when we enter there is a sign that says choose any side since the families are becoming one. I smile at the sign and we find seats towards the front. I settle Toby into my lap.

"This is so exciting," I smile at Bucky, "I love weddings."

"Me too, I can see that everyone is happy," Bucky says, "Peggy is even here."

"I'll have to talk to her. She'll want to see Tobias. She helped me so much before he was born. I don't know what I would have done without her."

"That will have to wait," Bucky whispers as the music starts. We watch the procession go down the aisle and I smile when I see Gabi. I look to see Steve looks like he is about to cry as Gabi walks down with Clint. I'm so happy for all of them.

The service was beautiful. I don't think anyone had dry eyes by the end of it. Everyone goes to Steve and Gabrielle and congratulates them on their marriage.

"Well, you guys finally got what we've all been waiting way too long for," I smile at them.

"Thank you Jessica," Gabi smiles, "I'm glad all of you came."

"Wouldn't miss it for the world."

Gabi smiles and soon we go to the reception at Avengers' tower. It is decorated very nicely.

"So, want to introduce me to some of your SHIELD friends?" I ask her. .

"Of course," She smiles, leading me to two people, "This is Maria Fury and Rebecca Coulson."

"Hi Jessica, it's nice to meet you," Maria says.

"Nice to meet you too," I smile, "I didn't know Fury had a daughter."

"Yea, we try to keep it on the downlow."

"I can understand that," I say, "Your parents must have a lot of enemies."

"Yea, that's how I met Gabi when we were seven."

"Wow, you guys have known each other for a long time," I say, "I'm surprised she never talked about either of you."

"It was for hers and other's protection," Rebecca says, "After my father and her brother saved her they needed to keep her safe if Hydra ever went after her."

"I know her brother well. Is he here tonight?" I ask, looking around the room, "He helped me readjust to this time."

"Of course he is, he did walk Gabrielle down the aisle."

"I know, but he didn't seem quite the party type to me," I say, readjusting Tobias, "Although, I could be wrong."

"He is somewhere with Tony, doing who knows what," Gabi says, "Those two are planning something and I am a little worried about that."

"Why don't you go find out what they are up to?" I ask her, "Or better yet, don't worry so much and go enjoy yourself. It's your party."

"Alright, I better find my husband, he may be with Peggy," Gabi says walking off.

"So," I turn back to my two companions, "What was it like being raised by SHIELD agents?"

"Well, I technically wasn't," Rebecca says, "I was rescued by them when I was 6. Before that some genetic researchers had me."

"Wow," I say, "That must have been tough as a kid. I couldn't imagine how I would feel if someone got a hold of Tobias here and experimented on him. What happened to your real parents?"

"I have no idea. I was adopted by the researchers. They never told me much, just that I had special genetics because of my father and grandfather. It doesn't really matter to me, anyways. Agents Coulson and Hill raised me. It was kinda fun growing up around all this stuff especially as a teenager."

"I can imagine. What about you, Maria?"

"Well it was hard for me too being the daughter of the director," Maria says, "I was always a target for the enemy. When I was seven, Gabi captured me but we ended up going to arcade instead of her base. After that I was trained by Coulson and Maria to protect myself. When I met Gabi again a month later she was different, more serious and like a Hydra agent. I trained and became a samurai around the time Coulson and Clint saved Gabrielle."

"I'm sure you guys know my story," I say, "It's not exactly a secret."

"My dad tried to hide it from us, but being who I am I hacked into the computers and we found out."

"Then you know I'm probably in constant danger," I say, "But it doesn't really matter."

"You will be fine, you have a lot of friends who will do anything to protect you," Maria smiles, "Besides I don't think Bucky would let anything happen to you or your son."

"I probably should go find him," I say, "He's not really good in crowds. Nice meeting you two. Hopefully we cross paths again."

"You too," Rebecca and Maria smile walking off. I scan the crowd looking for his familiar blue eyes and long black hair. He has to be here somewhere. Suddenly, someone taps my shoulder and I almost jump. I turn around quickly. Standing there was Natasha with a small smile on her face.

"Don't scare me like that!" I exclaim.

"Sorry, just so you know Bucky is with Tony, Clint and Sam," Natasha says.

"Great. That can't be good," I sigh, "They better not corrupt him."

"It was his idea to play a little 'joke' on Steve."

"What sort of joke?"

"Not sure."

"I don't want to have to babysit two people tonight," I say.

"Don't worry, I don't think it will be that bad," Natasha laughs.

"I talked Bucky into coming to the wedding," I say, "He better not make me regret that choice."

"It's natural for the best friend of the groom to do something to his friend. Clint's wedding was hilarious since I played the joke with Gabrielle's help."

"He's been acting so strange lately. He hasn't been himself. I'm worried about him. But I know I can't worry about him and take care of Toby properly."

"He will be fine, he is just trying to readjust to normal life. After all he has been fighting for over 70 years."

"I know, but it's been almost a year," I say, "He was back to himself for a while, but then something changed again. Do you think something happened? Something really bad?"

"I don't think so, maybe he was worried about what Steve would do and say seeing him after what happened with the fall of SHIELD."

"He never told me anything about what happened and I never asked. I don't really think it matters. I'm just glad I have him back."

"I bet he will be himself after today since he finally gets to talk to Steve."

"I guess it wasn't really fair of me to keep Bucky to myself. Especially because Steve and Sam have been looking so hard for him."

"I bet they understand, but I think they be madder at Gabi since she knew about him being with you."

"I told her not to tell."

"Don't worry everything will be fine."

"Everyone," Sam says, "Can I have your attention." The crowd turns to face him.

"Being one of the best friends of the groom I just wanted to congratulate him and his lovely wife."

"Flattery won't stop me from passing you on our runs," Steve says.

"Well it was worth a shot. Anyway myself, Clint, Tony and Bucky wanted to give him a little embarrassing moment."

Soon a little movie of Steve's past began to play for everyone. Steve face palms and tries to hide as everyone watches his embarrassing video. I smile as I watch it, laughing with the rest of the crowd.

"Sam, you suck," Steve says after the video finishes.

"It was Bucky's idea," Clint calls up.

"Bucky! I didn't need my friends or my wife to know about any of that!"

"Sorry, but I have been planning that for over 70 years," Bucky laughs.

"Hey, you can get back at them when they get married," I say from my spot in the crowd, smirking to myself.

"What makes you think I'm going to get married?" Bucky asks, and I frown, hoping he didn't really mean it. Did I want to get married? I don't know. I truthfully never thought about marrying him. I had better things to think about.

Things go well after that and now Steve and Gabrielle are having their first dance together. Everyone joins them besides me. I watch the others dance around from my table, Toby in my arms.

"They look so happy," I tell him, "I hope someday you get married, Toby. But not for a long time." I turn my eyes back to the crowd.

"May I have this dance?" Bucky asks me walking up.

"Can't dance while I'm babysitting," I tell him.

"I can babysit," Maria says, who is sitting next to me.

"It's fine, really," I say, "I'm not wearing the right shoes to dance."

"You should dance Jess, relax a little nothing will happen to him."

"I don't even know how to dance. I'd rather just watch the others," I say, not even looking at anyone.

"That is fine," Bucky says sitting next to me.

I don't move from my spot as time passes. I watch everything that happens around me. People have always fascinated me. Ever since I was young, I like to watch people interact with each other, even though I've never been a people person myself. I get distracted and then I feel someone lift my son from my lap.

"Hey!" I exclaim, "Give me my son back."

"It's alright Jess," Bucky says holding Tobias, "He was getting a little antsy."

"I do know how to take care of my own kid, you know," I say, crossing my arms.

"You seemed to be distracted so I thought I would take him."

"Well, I was watching everyone else," I say, "We should probably head home soon if he's getting antsy."

"Alright, the reception is ending anyway. I will go say goodbye to Steve."

"I'll come with you," I say, "I need to find Gabi, and I'm guessing they are together."

"Come on," Bucky smiles and he takes my hand and we go to find the newly married couple.

We find them apart, so I separate from Bucky and my son to talk to Gabi. Gabi was all happy and smiley when I walk up.

"Hi Jess," Gabi says seeing me.

"Hey," I say, "Toby's getting a little antsy, so we should probably go."

"I'm so glad you all came, Bucky and Steve seem so happy to finally be friends again."

"Yeah. Now he has something else to do," I say, "Which is fine by me. I've been around him maybe a little too much lately. Someone had to look after him, though."

"He may have just needed to get out more. Now that we have Hydra under some control he can go out now."

"And I can get some peace," I say, "Well, as much peace as one can get while caring for a baby."

"Jess, I hope you and Bucky will be happy. Oh and don't let his comment earlier get to you, he was lying," Gabi smiles, "I better go, Steve says our flight leaves in an hour."

"Lying? Lying about what?" I ask her, but she was already walking away from me.

Bucky soon walks up with a now sleeping Tobias.

"Come on, let's go home," I say, walking ahead of him towards the exit.

Bucky follows quietly behind me as the room empties out of all of the guests.

I drive us home in silence. I'm exhausted and my mind is full of thoughts about everything that happened today. I am confused and a little hurt, but mostly angry. I have never been the type to be quiet when I'm mad rather than letting people know, but today, I didn't feel like yelling. I didn't feel like saying anything. I just grip the steering wheel tight and focus on the road just a little too hard.

"Jessica, what's wrong?" Bucky asks.

"Nothing is wrong," I say immediately. It's a natural reaction at this point from years of lying to people, telling them that I'm fine and that nothing is wrong.

"You're lying."

"I am not lying." Another natural reaction.

"Yes you are, I can tell."

"Because you know me so well," I say sarcastically. Sarcasm is a defense mechanism for me, mastered from years of practice.

"I know because of the fact I am trained to know when someone is lying to me."

"I'm just tired, James."

Bucky stops talking then.

When we arrive home, I park the car and pull my still sleeping son from his car seat. I pull him close to my body and walk briskly into the building and press the 3 button on the elevator. The door closes before Bucky makes it to the elevator and I rise to the third floor in silence.


	10. Chapter 10

**Well, my best friend keeps harassing me to write because and I quote: "I'm more addicted to this than I am** ** _Criminal Minds._** **" So, you can thank her for the update. I just finished writing chapter 14. You're going to love it.**

 **Shoutouts: WaterGirl15 and my best friend**

 **Warnings: Drama and anger**

 **Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine.**

Once I get to the apartment, I carry my son up to his room. I change him out of his cute little outfit and into his penguin pajamas. I hear the front door open and close downstairs as I lay him in his crib.

Then I walk into my room and take off my stupid dress and change into sweats. I then climb down the stairs, pretending to be busy playing with my phone. I see Bucky is walking towards the stairs and I move away as I continue to walk down. I reach the bottom of the stairs and settle on the couch, turning on repeats of some stupid sitcom. After a while Bucky joins me but says nothing to me.

Suddenly I hear crying and move to get up, but he blocks my path.

"I've got him," I say, "You can sit down."

"I can handle it, you need to rest more," Bucky says.

"I CAN TAKE CARE OF MY SON!" I finally snap.

"I never said you can't, but Jessica you don't have to do it alone. I am here to help with our son."

"I don't need your help anymore," I tell him, "So you can go back to playing with Steve."

"I am not leaving you Jessica."

"Maybe I want you to leave !" I exclaim, "I was better off before I met you! I wish I never had."

"You don't mean that."

"Yes, I do! At least then I would have a chance at happiness! I'm just stuck here with no future!"

"You do have a future Jessica."

"Not one that I want!" I yell, "You ruined my life and now I have to take care of you and your son!"

"What future do you want?"

"Not one that I'm stuck in this stupid New York apartment without a chance to fall in love in some magical place like Paris and get married on a beach and then travel the world! I know it sounds stupid, but it's what I wanted as a kid. But now I have a kid to take care of and I'll never go to Paris or get married. Although, marriage has lost its appeal. But still, I don't get to see the world."

"You can see the world Jessica, we can leave Tobias with a babysitter or Gabrielle and Steve. I love you Jessica and I want you to be happy."

"There is no 'we', James! There never will be! You're my roommate and that's all you'll ever be."

"Jessica, I love you and always will and I know you love me. I'm sorry for hurting you so much, but I want you to be happy."

"Stop saying that! You don't know anything!" I push past him and head upstairs to find out what Tobias wants. As soon as I pick him up, I can feel how hot he is.

"Poor baby. You have a fever," I say. I carry him into the bathroom to take his temperature, switching right back into mom mode. The thermometer only takes a few seconds, but I know the number I see is bad. 102.3.

"JAMES!" I yell

Soon after yelling I hear Bucky running towards me.

"What's wrong?" He asks worried.

"He's burning up. I need to take him to the ER," I say, "Try not to set the apartment on fire." I take the stairs two at a time and slip my shoes on.

"I'm coming with you," I hear Bucky say.

"Fine. Whatever. Just hurry," I say.

We hurry to the car and Bucky tells me to sit in the back with Tobias just in case something happens and he will drive. I set Tobias in his car seat and buckle him in, then settle in the seat beside him. He won't stop crying and I don't blame him. Bucky drives us to the closest ER and we take Tobias in to be looked over.

We aren't there long before a doctor takes him away, just leaving us to worry in the waiting room.

"This is all my fault!" I say, trying not to cry.

"It's not your fault Jessica," Bucky says.

"Yes, it is. I said that you ruined my life! This is just karma. Toby made my life so much better. I don't know what I'd be doing without him. I never thought I'd have a child."

"Everything will be fine, Toby is going to be ok."

"You don't know that! Something could be very wrong. I knew I shouldn't have brought him to the zoo yesterday! He probably picked something up there."

"The doctors will look him over."

"I know how this works, James. But they might find something really bad. We could lose him!"

"We won't lose him."

"Or maybe they'll think I'm a bad mother and CPS will take him away from me," I start to cry, panic washing over me, "He's all I have, James."

"They won't take him from you Jessica, you are a wonderful mother."

"No I'm not," I pace back and forth, still crying. I hate being away from my son, let alone in a situation like this.

"Yes you are." I shake my head, not saying anything.

I hear Bucky sigh in defeat and he doesn't say anything else, but that's when I notice his leg is moving a lot.

"James? Are you okay?" I ask him, frowning.

He doesn't answer as he looks at the doors where Toby went through.

"James?"

"I don't like it here," he mumbles.

"Because it's like the Hydra facility? James, you don't have to stay here," I tell him, feeling a little bad, but still mad enough to keep calling him James, which I know he hates.

"I am not leaving my son."

"I can take care of him. You said he'll be fine. Now you need to be fine. Go home. I'll stay here and let you know if something happens."

"No, the last time I left...she wasn't the same," Bucky mumbles obviously remembering something.

"She? James, we have a son."

"I mean Gabrielle, I left her when she needed me and she was never the same after that."

"These doctors aren't going to hurt him. You need to go home. This place is messing with your mind. I don't want you to have an episode."

He abruptly gets up and leaves the hospital as if trying to compose himself. I sit back down and watch him leave, wrapping my arms around myself. I'm alone once again. It doesn't matter that I would prefer not to be alone because Bucky's sanity is more important than anything. Everything has been good for a while, but I know enough to give him space when he starts acting like that. I want to call someone, but Steve and Gabi are on the plane. I sit and wait until I feel a hand grab mine. I feel like I should recognize it, but I have to look up to see a new person beside me.

"Are you ok?" the person asks.

"Who are you?" I ask her.

"Oh sorry, my name is Laura Barton, Clint's wife."

"Nice to meet you, but why are you here?" I ask her, "Does SHEILD monitor who comes into the ER or something?"

"What? Oh no, not at all. I'm here because Cooper broke his arm skateboarding."

"The question is how do you know who I am?" I ask her.

"Clint and Gabrielle."

"I mean how did you recognize me?" I ask her. I knew Clint would have talked about me, but how could his wife know what I look like?

"The wedding, I was watching from Clint's phone since we could not attend."

"Oh," I say, "My son, he's sick. I have no idea what's wrong with him and he's all I have right now."

"He may have the flu, it is going around. But I wouldn't worry too much, he will get over it."

"I already feel like I'm awful at this whole mother thing. Actually, I'm pretty sure karma just hates me for some reason. There is always something in the way of my happiness."

"I did happen to see what happened between you and Bucky. From what Gabrielle told Cooper and Lila you two were happy."

"I guess she was wrong," I say, "I guess it's just not meant to be. But he won't move on, not with Toby. He feels like he has to take care of him."

"He seems very loving, Gabrielle said he was always protective of her."

"I guess it's just me, then. I tend to mess things up. I've never even been in love before. I never even stopped to consider if I love him. Everything was happening so fast in the war that I was afraid of losing him. Maybe that fear forced itself into making me think I was in love. How did you know you were in love?"

"Well, you would do anything for that person. I know I love Clint because I worry over him everyday he is gone on a mission. You worry for them, you want to protect them and want them to be happy."

"The only person I can worry about is my son. I hardly let him out of my sight," I say, "I'm always terrified something will happen to him."

"Maybe you shouldn't be with Bucky then. Having him live with you is a mistake too, you are just leading him on."

"I can't kick him out. He needs me. And Toby needs a father. I'm not leading anyone on. Nothing has happened between us."

"But he still loves and obviously has told you. Jessica, it is in his best interest if you aren't living together."

"He hasn't done anything to make it seem like he loves me. I haven't had time to talk to him that much. Everything is about Toby right now. Except he doesn't like hospitals and I didn't want him to get upset or something, so I told him he could go."

"I understand that, but being roommates with him is not going to help him, it will only hurt him."

"I don't want him to leave."

"Why? You don't love him."

"But what if I do and haven't realized it. I should give it a chance, shouldn't I? For Tobias to have his parents together. I like being around him. I don't know what I'd do if he was gone and I was alone."

"Maybe you two need time apart so you can figure it out. I bet Tony will let him stay at the tower."

"No." I can't let him leave. I can't lose him completely from my life. I can't hurt him like that. And Toby needs him.

"You won't be apart forever, not until you figure out if you love him or not."

I was about to reply, but a doctor approaches us.

"Miss Arnold," the doctor says.

"What's wrong with Tobias?" I ask him, "Is he going to be okay?"

"He will be fine, he just has a mild flu virus. For children his age they have higher risks of these types of fevers, but give him a few days and he will be himself again."

"Can I see him?" I ask the doctor.

"Of course, we want to keep him one night to make sure the medication is working."

"Okay. Can you take me to him?" I stand up.

The doctor leads me to Tobias's room, he lets me enter and I see my son sleeping soundly. I sit down in the chair beside his bed and put my hand over his tiny one.

"My poor baby," I whisper, watching his chest rise and fall.

"He will be alright Miss Arnold, he is a strong little soldier," the doctor says before leaving.

"My little soldier. You're just like your daddy, little one. I love you so much," I say, "Mommy isn't going anywhere."

I must have drifted off, because I wake with the smell of coffee and a hand on my shoulder.

"What? Huh?" I ask, blinking a few times.

"Sorry Miss, I thought I should wake you," a nurse says, "I brought you some coffee."

"Thank you, nurse," I smile at her, "I definitely need it."

"You are welcome."

"When can I take home my son?" I look at him. His eyes are open, but he's quiet.

"Today actually, His fever has gone down. He should be himself either later today or by tomorrow."

"Alright. Do I need to sign some papers."

She nods her head and gathers the papers I need to sign to take Toby home. I fill them out, watching my little boy. The door opens again and I turn around.

"Bucky? I thought you hated hospitals."

"I do, but I wasn't going to leave my son," Bucky says. I stand up and wrap my arms around him.

"I'm really sorry for being like that yesterday. Just after you said you didn't want to get married, I thought we didn't have a future."

"What? I only said that so Steve and Sam wouldn't plan anything. Steve has just enough dirt on me that I had on him. I do want to get married, but not anytime soon maybe."

"I know. I was talking to Clint's wife earlier, trying to convince her and myself of something. But, I can't believe a lie no matter how much I want to. I don't just want you around so Tobias can have a father. I don't want to lose you and it's very selfish. I want to love you, but I don't know how. You're hard to get close to."

"I'm sorry Jessica, I know it is hard. But maybe Laura is right and we do need time away from each other just for a bit."

"No," I shake my head, my eyes watering, "I don't want to be alone. I can love you like you deserve. We just need to get used to each other. Maybe leave Toby with them for a weekend and have time to be together. And if you still want to leave after that, I won't stop you."

"Alright, but lets leave Toby with Clint and Laura, with Steve and Gabrielle gone I don't trust the other Avengers with him. Stark may make him a suit."

"We could leave him with Natasha or Dr. Banner."

"Natasha has a mission and Banner...we don't want to get him stressed or mad."

"Right. Probably not a smart idea to have him around such a young kid," I say, lifting Toby into my arms. I hate seeing him like this.

"Come on, let's get him home."

"That sounds nice," I take his hand and stand up. We walk to the desk and I hand the discharge papers over to the nurse.

The nurse smiles as we head to the car. I strap Toby into his seat and slide next to him as we drive off, uncertain about the future.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hi guys! I meant to put 10 on last night, so I'm putting both up right now. Well, I'm on 15 right now, so have number 11. I think you'll enjoy it after the angstyness of the previous chapter :)**

 **Shoutouts: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SEBASTIAN!**

 **Warnings: Fluffy**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel**

It took about three days for Toby to be himself again, three days in which I barely left his side or got any sleep. However, as soon as he was better, he was back to being a little troublemaker.

"Bucky, do you have Toby?" I call from the livingroom. I had left him in his playpen while I made lunch and now he is gone.

"Yes, he wanted to get out so I thought maybe I should play with him," Bucky answers.

"Okay. Just let me know next time. I know he can get out on his own. I hope Clint and Laura can handle him this weekend. He is a little troublemaker."

"I think they will be fine." I walk into the room and watch Bucky playing with our son from the doorway.

Bucky smiles as Toby tries to climb up to grab his father's hair. As Toby gets close Bucky gently tickles Toby's side making him laugh. Bucky pulls him close continuing to tickle his son.

"You're good with him," I say, sitting down with a sandwich.

"I'm glad, I guess helping take care of Gabrielle helps."

"Yeah, you have experience."

Bucky smiles lifting up his son in the air making him giggle more.

"Dada!" he exclaims and I freeze.

"Di-di-did he just talk?" I ask, smiling, "He hasn't done that before!"

"He did," Bucky says his eyes wide, "he just spoke!" I wrap my arms around Bucky, beaming. I can't believe this is happening. My little boy just said his first word.

"Our son just talked!" I exclaim, "I can't believe it. He called you Dada. Toby, can you say Mama?"

We both look at Toby to see if he is going to say anything else.

"Dada!" He says again, smiling, as if he's proud of himself, "Dada!"

"I have a feeling that's all he knows," Bucky says.

"Well, it's a start," I smile, "He can learn lots of new words too. I just am so happy he can talk! He's grown so much!"

"He has, our little boy is growing up so well."

"He turns one in two weeks," I smile, "A year ago I was in your old Brooklyn apartment, worrying about him. With Agent Carter taking care of me."

"Now you are here with Toby."

"And you," I remind him, "I couldn't have done any of this without you."

Bucky smiles at me before looking back at our son.

"Do you want lunch?" I ask him.

"Sure, I can make it. Has Toby eaten yet?"

"Yes, I gave him lunch before I made my lunch," I say, "I can make you some lunch."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course," I say, "What would you like?"

"Just a sandwich is fine."

"What do you want on your sandwich?" I ask.

"Hmm...ham, mayo, and a pickle is good."

"Okay," I go into the kitchen and make his sandwich before returning to him and handing the plate to him, "Here you go. I can take Toby."

"Here Toby, go to Mama," Bucky says handing Toby to me and taking the plate. I sit down beside Bucky on the couch with Toby on my lap, bouncing him a little. I glance over at Bucky as he eats his lunch. He's changed a lot since the 1940's, but yet he's still somehow the same old Bucky deep down, I just know it. The Bucky that annoyed me so much, but I also loved so much. But change is a good thing, right? I continue to stare at him. It amazes me how similar he and Toby look and how much alike they are.

"Jessica?" Bucky asks breaking me out of my thoughts, "Are you alright?"

"What? Huh? Oh, I'm fine. I was just thinking," I blush.

"Alright," Bucky smiles as he gets up to clean his plate.

"Why me?" I ask.

"Why what?" Bucky asks.

"Why did you pick me?" I ask, "You could have had anyone you wanted, but you chose me."

"Unlike other girls you were not afraid to stand up for yourself, other girls just wanted to have a man to protect them. You were different and I like that."

"I wasn't very nice to you the first time we met," I say, "But you took care of me anyways. You've always been there for me, but I feel like I've never shown appreciation for that."

"It's alright, I did it because I wanted to do what was right. While I was I ended up falling in love with you."

"If I didn't have Toby, would you still be here?"

"Yes."

"Why? You have no reason to stay here. I do care about you, I'm just not good at showing or telling people how I feel."

"Loving you is reason enough for me." I sigh. I know he loves me a lot and I feel guilty for treating him badly. He doesn't have to stay with me, but he does. I know I have to force my walls down and let him in. He deserves it.

"So, have you thought about what you want to do this weekend?" I ask him, "I have a few ideas."

"What are your ideas?" Bucky asks.

"Well, we could have a picnic in central park. It's one of my favorite places. We could go visit Liberty Island. We could spend a day in the Natural History museum. Or we could stick to normal dates and do dinner and a movie. There is just so much to do here, but I don't have any time because of Toby."

"I like the first idea, we can have dinner and a movie on Sunday before Toby comes home."

"Alright. We can walk around Central Park for a while, too. Maybe go to the Zoo. I loved it when I went there. I think I was 14."

"Sounds like a plan."

"Good," I smile, "I can get us tickets online. I think someone needs a nap." I notice Toby's eyes closing. I carry him upstairs and put him down for his nap.

The weekend came faster than I thought I would. Clint came over to pick up Tobias.

"Hi," I smile, answering the door, "I'm assuming you're here for the little guy. Come on in. He's upstairs with Bucky."

"Well you seem really happy," Clint smiles following me.

"I am. We've got our weekend planned out," I smile, "And I'm sure you'll take good care of my little soldier."

"Of course, Oh! Gabi sent this letter for you, she couldn't remember you address so she wanted me to pass it on."

"Thanks," I take the letter from him as Bucky comes downstairs with Toby in his arms and his bag slung over his shoulder. I take Toby from him and kiss his little head.

"Toby, you're going to spend a couple days with Uncle Clint and his family. They'll take good care of you. Be good for them, okay? Mama loves you and she'll miss you a lot."

"If there is any trouble just give us a call," Bucky says, "Toby be a good little soldier alright?" Toby smiled at his daddy as I hand him and the bag over to Clint.

"I put some instructions and his normal schedule in the bag, but he'll be fine even if you don't follow it. Oh, he loves his panda, so if he's crying, that's probably what he wants. But, you're a dad. I'm sure you know how to take care of him."

"Everything will be fine," Clint says adjusting Toby, "You two enjoy your weekend."

"Thank you, Clint," I smile and watch him leave with Toby. I shut the door once I can't see them anymore.

"Want to head out?" Bucky asks.

"Yep. I packed the picnic while you were getting Toby ready," I smile, "The basket is in the kitchen. I'll go grab it."

"Alright." I walk into the kitchen and grab the basket off the table and walk back over to Bucky. I grab my purse from its spot near the door.

"Let's go," I smile at him, "Today is going to be fun."

Bucky takes my hand was we leave the apartment.

The walk to central park isn't a long one and I smile the whole way there, holding hands with Bucky. I'm so glad to have him to myself, if only for the weekend. However, we have plans and I know we're both going to enjoy them.

I find my favorite spot in central park - right next to the duck pond. I stand at the edge of the pond and observe the ducks swimming around.

"I remember this place," Bucky says.

"You do? I love here," I smile, "I think it's so peaceful."

"Yea, Steve and I used to come here or I would find Steve sitting here drawing."

"Did he draw the ducks?" I ask, "I'd love to be able to draw like he does. Instead, I just have my writing."

"Steve drew everything around, I bet you are a better writer than Steve is."

"See for yourself," I pull a journal out, "I kept this while I thought you were dead. I think you should read it. It's got a lot about Toby, but there is other stuff about what I was doing and how I was feeling." I hold it out. It's just a plain looking composition notebook, but for almost a year, it was all that kept me sane.

Bucky takes the journal and goes to sit under the tree near by. I set up our picnic as I watch him. I had struggled with thinking of giving it to him for weeks, but hadn't brought myself to until now. He deserved to know the truth about what happened. After a while, Bucky shuts the journal and walks over to me.

"Picnic is ready," I tell him, settling down on the blanket.

"Thank you Jess, you really are amazing."

"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask, handing him a sandwich.

"If you feel comfortable to talk about it."

"It was like a year and a half ago. We can talk about it."

"Alright, I am so sorry for putting you through all of that. I swear I do not remember that night."

"Neither do I, but it was one of the best nights of my life."

"Really? Even though it was our last night together?"

"Bucky, I'm sure you don't know much about the subject, but that night is the reason that Tobias exists. Doesn't take a genius to figure out what we did."

"Yea I guess you are right."

"I'm sure no one ever taught you about that kind of thing. Everyone is so modest in the 40's."

"Oh no, I knew. You had to learn it in school, Steve hated that subject in school." I picture Bucky and Steve sitting in a sex ed class and start laughing hysterically at the thought.

"I can only imagine," I say, still laughing really hard.

"Steve was so innocent! He would blush every time in class," Bucky laughs.

"He's on his honeymoon. I doubt he's innocent anymore," I giggle.

"Well according to Natasha, she walked into their apartment the day after their first time."

"Wait, they did it before they got married? I'm so proud of Steve," I finish my sandwich.

"Yea, she didn't give details but she could tell they totally did it," Bucky says finishing his sandwich.

"Okay, no more talking about doing it with families around. So, did you have any other questions?" I hand him a small bag of potato chips.

"No, but I want to apologize for leaving you to go through all of that on your own."

"You fell off a train, Bucky. You didn't really have much of a choice. Hydra kidnapped you. Although, I am glad they saved you." I take my own bag of chips and start munching.

Bucky smiles at me.

After we finish our picnic, I clean up and pull myself to my feet. I pick up the basket and intertwine my fingers with Bucky's real ones.

"Come on, we better get to the zoo," I say, "What's your favorite animal?"

"I always loved the lions."

"Lions? Why?" I ask him as I lead him along the paths back towards the main road.

"My father would always take me to see them first, so I just loved to see them at the zoo."

"What were your parents like?" I ask him, "I assume they died before I met you, just like Steve's."

"Yea, they died a bit before the war. They were amazing, they did everything to make sure I was happy even though we didn't have much money. They treated Steve like a second son when I met him in grade school, they would have loved you."

"I'm sure I would have loved them too," I smile sadly, "I'll have to arrange a visit and take you and Toby back home to East Syracuse for a weekend. She's been wanting to see me in person for a while now. Skype isn't the same."

"I would love that."

"Then I'll have to arrange it," I smile as we make it to the front of the zoo in time to see the bells ring. We proceed to the entrance and I give the lady our tickets before we walk into the zoo.

"I haven't been here in years," I smile, "Let's start at the lions."

"Let's," Bucky smiles.

"Lead the way, soldier," I smile, walking alongside him. There are families everywhere with multiple kids. A few kids are screaming really loud, making me really hate bad parents and glad that Toby isn't like that. He's actually rather quiet most of the time. We find our way to the lions and I watch them. It's not too hot of a day, so they aren't all laying around in the shade.

"Big kitties," I hear a little boy say and smile a little.

"We have to bring Toby here when he's older."

"We will, maybe we can have a party for him here," Bucky says.

"That would be fun. But not for a while. Maybe when he's 6 or 7," I smile, "If we're still in the area. I always pictured living in a cute neighborhood in a suburb with 3 or so kids running around."

"We could always move if you want."

"Sorry, that was a little forward, wasn't it? I mean, I don't even think we're technically dating."

"That is fine."

"I mean, unless you want us to," I say, looking anywhere but at him.

"I always wanted us together, but I do remember asking you to be my gal before I left."

"That was 1945. I wasn't sure if we were still technically together. But I'm glad if we are. I don't want to be with anyone else," we move away from the lions and start to wander around some more.

The date goes well as we look at everything in the zoo. While we're at the polar bears, Bucky leaves for a minute to get a bottle of water. I watch the polar bears and someone bumps into me. Strange, there was no one in here a moment ago. I turn to see who it is, but suddenly a hand covers my mouth with a damp, sweet smelling cloth. My body betrays me as my eyes close and I start to fall.

"Jessica!" I hear Bucky yell. It's the last thing I hear before I'm completely gone.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hi guys! Sorry about that cliffhanger (not really. I like using them because I'm evil.) Anyways, I leave for college in a few days, but I hope to be done writing this by then. Sit back and enjoy. From this chapter on, other than my best friend who is betaing, I'm writing by myself, so sorry about any mistakes.**

 **Disclaimer: If I owned Disney or Marvel, everyone could have seen the new Civil War trailer by now. (Just saying.)**

 **Warning: Language! Sciencey/biology stuff, and sorta sexual stuff.**

I wake up in a hospital gown, strapped to a cold metal table. I couldn't move my arms or legs. I force my eyes open and see that I am in some sort of lab with scientists all over tha place. One jams a needle into my arm.

"Hey!" I yelp, "What was that for?"

"My apologies," the man says in a thick British accent, "She's awake!"

"Who are you? Where am I? Why did you stick a needle into my arm?" I ask him, still struggling against my bonds.

"The boss will explain, ma'am. I'm just a lab tech. I was taking your blood."

"What do you need my blood for?" I don't get my answer, because a guy in a lab coat walks over to me. I recognize him almost immediately.

"You're that doctor from SHIELD! The one that I met when I first came through. YOu looked over me and Tobias," I exclaim, "Why did SHIELD kidnap me? Where's Bucky?"

"Working at SHIELD was a cover," he says, "I needed access to your son. I was the one chosen to work inside SHIELD."

"You're Hydra!" I exclaim, "Why haven't they found you?"

"You really think Hydra was the only agency to have moles inside SHIELD?" he laughed, "Foolish girl. No, I work for a different organization. Your friend Rebecca is familiar with us. We're called Gemini."

"You guys do genetic research! What do you want with me? I'm not special. And neither was Rebecca. You experimented on a little kid!"

He started to laugh again, "We picked Rebecca on purpose. Her father is Bruce Banner. Dr. Ross had her before the accident. She never even told him about her. He doesn't even know to this day that he has a daughter. She had potential for the same reason Banner did. His father was a geneticist. He experimented on himself, which effected Bruce and effects Rebecca."

"How do you know all this?" I ask him, "And why do you want me?"

"We have eyes everywhere," he says, "And we aren't after you. We're after your child."

"If you touch a hair on Tobias's head, I swear to God-"

"Don't you think that if I was interested in Tobias, I would have him? I took him from you when he was a baby. We hoped with what Hydra did to his father, when we made him, he would be special."

"When you made him? Bucky and I made him long before you existed."

"Silly girl. You never slept with him. We hoped you would, but you wouldn't. We had samples from Hydra. We worked together partially. We made a deal. Why do you think you don't remember that night? Because we didn't want you to."

"A deal?" I ask him.

"They wanted Barnes back. So we arranged his fall," he says. If I could have, I would have slapped him. However, he was giving me information that I needed.

"So why didn't you take Tobias?" I ask him.

"Because he's ordinary. Even though he looks like his father, he isn't special. We need a special child in order to do anything."

"But I'm not pregnant," I say, "And I don't plan on it for a long time."

"You see, Miss Arnold, you will be. Eventually, but right now, we need to make you special to make sure your child will be special. So, my lab techs are going to keep doing their job. They already took samples that you wouldn't want to be awake for. Once we finish taking our samples and analysing, we will enhance you and then take more samples to make sure it worked."

"Then what? Impregnate me?" I spit at him.

"No, no. We can't do that. We have no way to do such a thing. SHIELD destroyed anything Hydra had on Bucky. But you told Mr. Barnes you wanted more kids. So, we can be patient. Unless, of course, he's stupid enough to come rescue you. Then, we'll do it for you. Or make you do it."

"That'll never happen!" I exclaim, "The Avengers will stop you."

"The Avengers don't even know we exist. Once we're done with you, we will get rid of any trace of us ever being here. You'll never find us."

"You won't get away with this!"

"Ah, but Miss Arnold, we already have. We've been around longer than Hydra and SHIELD doesn't know anything about us. Hydra got too ambitious. Tried to change the world too quickly. We are a lot more patient then they are."

"Why are you telling me all this? I could just go tell SHIELD all this after I let you go."

"You could, but I'm not telling you anything of import. So, it doesn't matter. You'll never have enough data to track us. However, we will always have eyes on you. And when you have a second child, we will take it from you."

"Then I won't have a second child," I say, "I'm not that stupid."

"We both know that won't happen," he says.

"Do we?" I ask.

"If I remember, you have a very cute son. I would hate to have something happen to him in the future," he said, "Jefferson, knock her out. Make sure she's out for a few days."

"Stay away from me!" I yell at the tech, who looks vaguely like Bucky, but his hair is a little shorter and looks more brown than black. He is only phased for a second before he injects me with another needle and I'm out cold.

The next time I wake up, I'm in a real hospital. I can tell by the smell and the beeping of machines. Plus, the bed is clearly a hospital one. I force myself into a sitting position.

"Jess? Thank God you're awake," Bucky takes my hand, "I was so worried."

"What happened? How long was I gone? Where's Tobias?"

"You were kidnapped from the zoo a week ago. The whole Avengers team and some of Gabi's SHIELD friends were looking for you. Then this morning turned up here in a room that was supposed to be empty."

"It's been a week? Damn Gemini agents. They kept me sedated for that long?" I growl.

"Gemini? Who is Gemini? Why were you sedated?"

"It's a genetic research secret organization. They're the ones that messed with Gabi's friend Rebecca. They were altering my genetics," I say, "Get someone from SHIELD here ASAP."

"Alright, Love. Tobias is fine, by the way. He's with your mother, actually. When she found out you were missing again, she came straight down. She was surprised to meet me."

"Sorry, I didn't know how to explain you yet. I'm sorry. I'm sure she figured it out, though."

"Well, yeah. He looks just like me," he laughs, "Oh, I forgot. Agent Hill is in the waiting room. I'll go get her." He stand up and leaves the room. When the door opens, he and Agent Hill walk into my room. He returns to my side.

"Nice to see you awake," Hill says, "How do you feel?"

"I feel good," I say, "But I have a lot to tell you. You may want to write it down."

"Not necessary," she says, "I have a nearly identic memory. That's why Fury made me his second. Now, what's going on?"

"I was taken by an organization called Gemini. They are interested in children with special genetics. They want to raise them into Super Soldiers. They were the ones that had Rebecca as a baby."

"We knew their name, but nothing about what they wanted. Why did they take her? Do you know?"

"They told me that she's Banner's daughter. Pre-accident," I say, "He doesn't know she exists."

"Oh, wow. We'll have to tell them about that. What else do you know about Gemini?"

"Well, the boss that I was dealing with was a doctor at SHIELD. He was the one that looked over me and Tobias when I first came back. He said Gemini has had moles in SHIELD for a long time. He knew you guys would bring me back through. They were watching me before Toby was even born. They worked with Hydra. They hoped Tobias would be special because of Hydra's experiments on Bucky, but he wasn't special. So, they were genetically modifying me so that our next child would be special." I blushed when I added that last part, not looking at either person in the room.

"So no more kids," Bucky says, "We have Toby."

"They threatened him if we don't," I sigh, "There is no way for us to find them. They're already gone. They said there would be no trace of them after I woke up."

"We will find them," Maria says, "Anything else?"

"No, that's all I remember," I say. Sure, I had left out some things, but they were personal. I'll tell Bucky, but no one else needs to know, "Although, they have really advanced, ahead of the time scientific equipment. You're looking for geniuses. Oh, I almost forgot. He slipped up and called one of the workers Jefferson. He looks like Bucky, but with shorter, brown hair. Maybe you can track him down? It could be a lead."

"I'll look into it. You should rest," Hill says and leaves.

"So, what were you not telling her?" Buck asks me quietly as soon as she's gone.

"Remember the night in the hotel after we were drinking?"

"No, we've already been over that. I don't remember a thing from that night."

"That's because they didn't want either of us to remember. Bucky, we didn't do anything that night," I tell him, "They wanted us to, but when we didn't, they made Tobias happen."

"What do you mean? He's my son. How could he happen if we didn't sleep together?" Bucky looks at me, confused.

"They had some… stuff from Hydra from when you were experimented on the first time. Hydra gave it to them in exchange for arranging your fall. It seems like nothing that happened to us has been in our control."

"So two evil secret agencies were interested in us? Wow, we must be really unlucky," he sighs.

"Hey, look on the bright side. We're still virgins. We can remember our first time when it actually happens," as soon as I realize what i said, my cheeks feel warm, "I mean, if you want it to happen."

"Jess," he took my hand, "Hydra had me do all sorts of missions. Some of those were getting information from people the easier way. You're not the first person to think I was attractive."

"What are you sa- oh," It took me a second, "They prostituted the Winter Soldier for information. Bucky, that wasn't actually you. Just because the Winter Soldier has slept around, doesn't mean Bucky has. You get what I'm saying?"

"I know you see the two of us as separate people, but we aren't Jess. I am the Winter Soldier. I killed all those people and slept with their wives, daughters, and sometimes sons."

"Bucky, I will never see you and him as the same person. Because my Bucky would never do those things by choice. Look at _Once Upon A Time._ I know that Hydra didn't literally have your heart, but they may as well have. And they were forcing you to do those things. All that matters is that you, James Buchanan Barnes, would never do those things. You know you wouldn't. Don't try to deny it."

"I'm glad you think so highly of me, even after all that's happened," he smiled sadly.

"Hey, what are true loves for?" I say, "I can think of two other things they are useful for. Getting ice cream and bringing children to the person they love."

"You want me to go over to build your own frozen yogurt place and get your favorite?" he asks me, "I'll send your mother in on my way out."

"Thank you, Bucky," I smile, "You're the best."

"I'll be back soon," he kisses my forehead and leaves.

A few minutes later, my mother walks in with Toby in her arms.

"Hi mom," I smile, "Nice to see you. I heard you met Bucky."

"Yes, I did. He's a very nice man," she smiles, placing Toby on my lap, "Not bad looking, either."

"Mom!" I blush.

"What? It's true. Plus, your little one looks just like him. He's going to be surrounded by girls when he's older."

"Mom, he's going to be one in a week. I don't think I have to worry about that for a very long time," I bounce Toby a little, "Are you ready to say Mama yet?"

"Dada!" he exclaims and I sigh.

"He's a daddy's boy, I see," my mom says, "How long has his father been around? And why does he have a fake arm?"

"He's been around since Toby was a baby. I just didn't know how to tell you. He sort of found me here. As for Bucky, he lost his arm in a train accident."

"So, how did you meet Toby's father?"

"Well, after I was captured, I managed to escape, but by then I was in South America. I had no idea how to get home and no money. That's when Bucky met me and took me in and we quickly fell in love. Then the accident happened and I thought he was dead."

"But he wasn't. Are you happy with him? Is he a good father to Toby?"

"He's a wonderful father, Mom. I'm so glad he's part of Toby's life," I smile, "And I'm glad he's in mine. I don't think I could do this without him."

"I'm glad you're happy, but did you have to name my only grandson after a fictional character?"

"Sorry, Mom. But you should have known me well enough as a teen to know that I would name my children after fictional characters."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Knowing the fangirl you are." The door opened and Bucky walked in with a bag from the frozen yogurt place.

"Dada!" Toby smiled as Bucky settled beside me and took out two cups of frozen yogurt.

"Hi Toby," he smiles, handing me one of the cups and a spoon, then opening his own cup.

"Thanks, Bucky," I smile, "Got some for yourself, I see."

"I wasn't going to, but it looked so good. I had to," he confesses, then looks over at my mom, "Hello ma'am."

"You don't have to call me that," she smiles, "You're practically family."

"Sorry, it's a habit," he says, scooping frozen yogurt into his mouth.

"I'm going to talk to the doctors about getting you released," my mom said and left the room.

"So, how is your frozen yogurt?" Bucky asks me.

"It's good," I say, "My mom thinks you're cute."

"Well, I'm taken," he says, "I'd take your hand, but we both need both of our hands. Oh, Hill says they need to take you to one of their doctors in a few days to make sure Gemini didn't do anything really awful to you."

"That is probably a good idea," I say, "However, they've been around longer than Hydra has, so I'm sure they know what they're doing."

"I know, Love, but I want to make sure. Now that we're together, I don't want anything to come between us."

"Me neither," I say and we finish our frozen yogurt in peace and Tobias falls asleep against me. I can't help but think about how lucky I truly am.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hi everyone! I've just finished writing chater and before I start 19, I thought I'd give you a new chapter. I leave for college tomorrow and classes start Monday. 19 will be the last chapter of this story and 20 will be the epilogue. The plan is to have the sequal to this story as a series of one shots (maybe some that are more chapters) following everyone's lives after the events of the story, so it won't just be Jess and Bucky.**

 **Shoutout: My awesome best friend (and soon to be roomie)**

 **Warnings: Fluffiness, awkwardness, a little sexual, and fangirling**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel nor any of the other fandoms that are mentioned in this chapter**

I'm released from the hospital after a day, only to spend three in SHIELD's custody. They take blood samples and look at them under microscopes. They, like Gemini, take lots of other samples too, some that I wish was I wasn't awake for, but I refused to let them put me under completely. I want nothing more than to go home to Bucky and Toby.

Those were three of the longest days of my life, but they did finally clear me, thankfully. They said they couldn't find anything that was life threatening. They have no choice but to send me home. I change back into my normal clothes and stand up.

"Ready to go?" Rebecca asks, entering the room, "I'm going to take you home and look after you for a few days."

"Yeah, I'm ready to go," I say, "But don't I have a boyfriend to look after me?"

"Yes, but what's left of SHIELD wants you monitored by someone that has experience with agencies like Gemini."

"Right. Because they had you for a few years. That must have been awful," I say, "Did they tell you what I found out about you?"

Rebecca frowned, "They didn't tell me anything."

"I know who your real parents are," I tell her.

"Y-you do? Gemini told you?" Rebecca asks, "Can you tell me?"

"Maybe I should wait until you're done babysitting me so that your mind isn't focused to it and you can actually take care of me."

"Right. Probably a good idea," she says as we exit the building and she drives me home. We ascend silently in the elevator. I'm afraid of accidently telling her the truth. It'll be a lot to take in when she learns.

I walk down the hall to my door when we reach the third floor. I insert the key and open up the door to find the apartment dark, which was really strange. I thought Bucky would have been waiting for me. I drop my keys in the bowl by the door and flip the lightswitch.

"SURPRISE!" The apartment is full of my friends and some of my family. Bucky was standing the closest with Tobias in his arms. My eyes start to water, knowing he planned this whole thing. I walk straight to him and kiss him, something that I haven't done in a while. I know that I shouldn't have with all those people around, but I couldn't stop myself. He kisses me back, but only for a moment, before he pulls away.

"Jess, as much as I love kissing you, we have company," he smiles, handing Toby over to me.

"Hi buddy," I smile, "Mama missed you. Let's go see our friends, okay?" I hold him with one arm and take Bucky's hand with the other. I go straight to my mom and stepdad first. My mom takes Toby from me.

"Everyone loves this little guy," she smiles, "He's the other star of the party. We were playing with him before Rebecca texted us that you guys were on your way up."

"Well, he is adorable,'' I smile, "Just like his daddy. Bucky, I know this was your idea."

"I did have the idea, but your mother and Gabi helped me a lot. I've never really planned a party before."

"Well, it's perfect, honey," I beam, "I've got to be the luckiest woman alive." He blushed and shifted uncomfortably. He reminded me for a moment of serum Steve, which made me laugh. This made him turn a darker shade of red. I don't want to laugh, so I walk away and go talk to Gabi for a moment.

"Hey," I smile, "I'm so glad you're here. I missed you."

"Sorry. The team has been busy taking down the remaining Hydra bases and searching for someone of interest."

"When do you leave again?" I ask her, wondering for much information I could get from her.

"Tomorrow morning," she says.

"Well, stay safe," I smile at her, "Maybe when you're done with this you can have your own family. I'd love to be an aunt. Toby could use a playmate."

"I hadn't really thought about it. Most SHIELD agents don't have kids."

"Your brother has kids," I point out, "Plus there is no SHIELD."

"Keep it down, would you? And his wife isn't an agent. Steve and I are soldiers. Someone still has to save the world and the team needs us."

"Maybe they need some new recruits to help them out."

"Like who? I'm sure you don't want your boyfriend on the team yet."

"No, he's staying here and playing Daddy. He's great with Toby," I lower my voice, "I don't think he's ready yet to go back. He still phases out and can get a little scary when he gets mad."

"Maybe you should go into therapy," she says.

"I don't think he'll agree to that willingly. He wants be be strong. It's that soldier thing."

"Then tell him you're feeling overwhelmed and you want to go into counseling and you'd like his support."

"That might work," I say, "I am a little stressed out with everything that has happened."

"I don't want to hog you," she smiles, "Go be social."

"I'll see you soon, I hope," I hug her and go get a drink in the kitchen. I look back into the living room and see Bucky talking to Steve, our son in his arms. Steve keeps tickling Toby, who is giggling loudly. I'm sure he loves all the attention he's getting.

"He's great with Tobias," a voice says beside me and I turn my head towards the source to see the blond archer

"Yeah, he is," I smile, "I don't think I've ever thanked you for everything you've done."

"Hey, you're my friend. Of course I'm at your party."

"Not that. When I first got here. You taught me how to be a mom. Sure, I made some mistakes, but I would have made a lot more without you," I say, "Maybe you should retire."

"Maybe. I mean, I'm about to have another kid," he says quietly.

"Really?" I smile at him, "Congratulations. Give Laura my best. Oh, and tell her thanks from me. She made me realize what I have and that it's worth fighting for."

"She told me about your conversation," he says, "I know you and Bucky belong together. You are great parents. Maybe some day you can do it all properly."

"What, you mean like getting pregnant again? Gemini has me between a rock and a hard space. How could I get pregnant again knowing I'm just handing the baby over, but how could I not give them a baby and have them hurt my son?"

"We will catch Gemini. And then I'll retire. Deal? That way we both have our families."

"Deal. But I thought the team was busy with Hydra," I say, "That's more important."

"We can take a break after this next mission and go after Gemini. I mean, we haven't found the guy yet, and we've raided a dozen Hydra bases."

"Geez, how many are left?" I ask, sipping my pepsi.

"Too many," he sighs. He looks older when he's all serious.

"I'm sorry," I say, "You'll catch all the bad guys, though. I know it."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because if I've learned anything from my binge watching, heroes always win."

"Thanks for the pep talk. I think my partner could use one. She's been so …. off lately."

"Maybe she's in love," I suggest. He shakes his head and before I can ask, he's crossing the living room and goes over to Nat. He says something and she laughs. I'm almost jealous of how close they are. I've never really had that sort of friend before.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Rebecca asks me, opening a soda can.

"I wish I was as close to someone as those two are," I motion towards Clint and Natasha, "They're way past best friends. It's like they are the same person."

"They've been through a lot together. It can do something to a person. You can be that person with Bucky. You need each other."

"I know, but I meant a platonic relationship. Who knows. It could still happen."

"See?" she smiles, then her phone starts playing the _Harry Potter_ theme song. She looks at it then silences it and slips it into her pocket.

"I didn't know you were a Potter head," I smile, "What house are you in?"

"I'd like to think of myself as a Ravenclaw," she says, "I was quite the nerd in high school. What about you?"

"Hufflepuff. I guess I'm a loyal person," I say, "But I can be dangerous if needed. Favorite character?"

"That's not a fair question! But I guess I'd have to pick Hermione. Now I'm going to make you choose."

"If I have to pick one, I guess I'll go with Sirius. Lily is a close second."

"Good choice. I'm pretty sure no one can hate Lily," she says, "So, any reason you named your son after Tobias Eaton?"

"That obvious, huh? I don't know. Tobias is so brave, smart., caring, honest, and selfless," I smile, "I want my son to be all those things."

"I'm sure he will be. You are a great mother. And Sergeant Barnes is a wonderful father. He'll turn out well."

"Thank you," I smile, "You know, I think we can be great friends."

"Me too," she says, "We have a while to get to know each other."

"You're stuck with me for 24 hours," I say, "You knew about this party, didn't you?"

"Of course I did. They didn't want to surprise me. They find it a bad idea to startle the girl with the poison in her fingers."

"What are you going to do now that SHIELD is dissolved?"

"I'm not sure. I guess I'm on protection detail now," she says,"I'll find my dad after I leave here. I'm sure we have a lot of catching up to do. Then I guess I can figure things out from there."

"That's a good plan. I'm sure your father will be glad to know about you," I say, "Not that I know him, but I'm sure he's a good guy."

"I hope so. Even if he's not, I'm sure it'll still be nice to know where I came from, you know?"

"Closure is always nice," I say.

The party lasts a few more hours and I talk to everyone. I'm just glad to be home and to be able to see my friends. After I say goodbye to my mother and see her out of the apartment, I turn around to see who is left. Bucky and Toby, obviously, Rebecca, Steve, and Gabi. Gabi and Rebecca are cleaning up and Bucky and Steve are talking very quietly towards the back of the living room. I step towards them to take TOby from Bucky for his nap.

"...I'm not sure she's ready yet, Buck," Steve says.

"But what if she is? There's no way to know. Maybe jumping in with both feet is the best option," Bucky replied.

"I think it's a little cold for swimming," I comment as I take Toby, who is half asleep, from his arms, "What are we talking about?"

"Kids," Steve says.

"Moving," Bucky says at the exact same time.

"Steve, I think you need to finish saving the world before you think about a family, or at least that's what she thinks," I say, "And I thought you liked living with the Avengers."

"I do. It's a pretty nice place," Steve says, "Lots of people around."

"I would like to move out of the city eventually," I say, "So Toby can have a big yard. And so I can have a proper house. Maybe a farm. That would be fun."

"That sounds nice," Bucky says, "After we deal with all this Gemini stuff, we can work on that."

"I'll have to hold you to that," I smile, "Now, I'm going to put a certain someone down for a n-a-p." I walk upstairs into Toby's room and set him down in his crib and he falls right asleep. I kiss his little head before I go back downstairs.

"We should get going," Gabi says, "I'll see you again soon."

"Stay safe," I tell her and hug her and Steve. They leave and then it's just Bucky, Rebecca, and I. I walk towards the kitchen, but Bucky blocks my path.

"Rebecca and I can clean up. You need to rest," he says firmly. I know better than to argue, so I settle down on the couch, twirling the baby monitor. I hope they get Gemini soon because right now I'm scared. I think about Bucky and Steve and wonder what they were really talking about back there. It's true they could have been talking about moving or starting a family, but they could be keeping something from me.

I'm pulled from my thoughts when Bucky sits down beside me and puts his arm around me.

"What are you thinking about?" he asks me.

"Just that we're between a rock and a hard place. How could we ever bring another child into this world knowing that we'd just placed it into Gemini's arms, but how could we not knowing they'll hurt Toby if we don't?"

"I don't think we need to worry about kids for a while, Jess. We aren't even close to getting married. That gives the Avengers plenty of time to stop Gemini so we can live in peace."

"But what if they don't? I don't want this thing hovering above my head, James! I don't want to be afraid of losing a child all the time."

"I know. This is my fault and I'm sorry," he sighs, "Of, I have something for you." He uses his free hand to pull something out of this pocket. It's a small package, like the kind you'd get in the mail. I take it from him and open the little bag and pull out a necklace. I grab one of the metallic pendants and smile as I read it.

 _James B Barnes_

 _32557038 T41 B_

Before I was brought back in time, the numbers would have been a blur to me. Now I know exactly what that mean. His army ID number, Tetanus information, and his blood type. The next three lines contain Steve's name and then our old apartment address and then a letter that stood for the what religion he was. Surprisingly, I had never known before.

"You're giving me your dog tags?" I ask him, finally looking up.

"I can't think of a better person to have them," he smiles, "Steve found them and gave them to me. Now, I'm giving them to you." He took the necklace from my hands and put it around my neck.

"Now you will have a piece of me even when we are apart." I lean against him and rest my head on his shoulder. He always makes a point of so I'm on his right side.

"You don't have to answer this, but I was just wondering if you were still you when you first woke up after Hydra 'rescued' you."

"Yeah, I knew who I was. The metal arm was a bit of a surprise. I'm sure the guy that I nearly choked to death when I first woke up was shocked. That's when they knew that I would never willingly cooperate. They had no choice but to keep messing with my mind and freezing me on and off."

"I'm sorry," I feel pathetic just saying it. I wish I could do something, but I can't, "Listen, I want to talk to you about something."

"You don't have to talk about it yet if you're not ready," he says.

"Well, that's what this is about. I've been through so much lately and I've been so stressed out. I want to talk to someone. A professional. And I'd like you to go with me for support."

"Of course. Anything for you. You're my best gal."

"You really need to catch up with modern lingo. The word is girlfriend now, Bucky. Has been for a while."

"I know. I'm just old fashioned like that. But you love me anyways," he teases me.

"I know. I love you and our son so much. I don't know where'd I'd be without you two. Honestly, I'm kinda glad that Gemini interfered in the hotel room. Toby brought us back together. Plus, we can still remember our first time together."

"Right. Gabi says I should go to a doctor and have a physical and get tested. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be getting tested for, though."

"I think she meant for you to get tested for… diseases. After all the things the Winter Soldier did to get information." Bucky turned a shade of red after a minute, finally getting what I was saying. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Are there a lot of those…?" He asks me finally.

"We call them STI's. There are quite a few. HIV/AIDS is the worst. Most of them are curable or treatable, but AIDS will kill you."

"That sounds awful. How does it kill you?" he asks.

"It weakens your immune system. It doesn't kill you itself. It makes it so something else can kill you."

"So it doesn't do the dirty work, it just makes it easier for someone else to. That sounds oddly familiar." My only reply is a yawn and some powerful force forces my eyes closed and I fall asleep using Bucky as a pillow.


	14. Chapter 14

**Hi guys! I'm all moved into my dorm room and I thought before I go get breakfast I'd give you guys a treat! I have officially finished writing this story and I will post chapter every other day or so. Maybe everyday. Anyways, enjoy.**

 **Shoutouts: To my awesome roomie/bestie**

 **Warnings: Fluffiness and fangirling**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel or any other fandoms mentioned.**

My day with Rebecca is awesome. We spend most of it talking about books and movies. It turns out we have a lot in common. She may become the Clint to my Natasha or the Bucky to my Steve. Everyone needs a best friend, after all. And it would be kinda awesome to have a best friend with powers. I've already made Bucky watch the _Harry Potter, Hunger Games, and Divergent_ movies, but he's also been slowly reading my favorite books. We don't have a lot of downtime with Toby and all the other stuff that has been going on.

"They need to stop making the characters that we're supposed to hate attractive," I rant, "I mean, how am I supposed to hate a guy with perfect abs? Even if I do have a boyfriend that's hotter than any of them will ever be." I add that because Bucky is in the next room and I know he'll be a little embarrassed by the comment.

"I get what you mean," she says, "But I'd rather look at a villian with a pretty face then one that looks like - well, President Snow for example."

"He's supposed to be an old man, Rebecca. Look at Valentine Morganstern. Yeah, he's evil, but he does not have a pretty face."

"Who?" she asks me.

"Do the world a favor and read The Mortal Instruments. You'll love it. It's pretty awesome," I say, "Right, hun?"

"Which one was that? The one where all the people have British accents even though the movie is set in New York City?"

"That's the one," I smile.

Our talks about movies and characters went on and on until she left the next day. We exchanged numbers and decided we needed to get back together. Plus, now I had another movie going buddy that fully understood the storyline. Bucky was good company, but he asked a lot of questions after those sort of movies. I had _Harry Potter_ questions for days after I made him watch all the movies.

"So, are you going to tell me now?" She says as we head down in the elevator.

"Tell you? Oh your father. Right," I say, "Your father is Bruce Banner."

"WHAT?" she exclaims, "Are you kidding me? My father is an Avenger? One that turns into a big, green monster?

"That's the one," I say, "When he gets back from their mission you need to talk to him."

"Yeah, no kidding. I wonder if he knew," Rebecca ponders.

"He doesn't. Your mother, Dr. Elizabeth Ross, never told him. They had already broken up when she found out about you," I say, "Oh, I looked into it. She died a few years ago in a car crash. I'm sorry."

"It's alright. It would have been nice to meet her, but I guess it doesn't matter," she sighs, "Thank you so much, Jessica."

"Yeah, no problem. You can always find where she's buried and visit her grave. That's what I always did with Bucky while I was pregnant and thought he was dead."

"Thanks. I might just do that," she smiles as the elevator reaches the lobby. I see her to the car before I head back up to the apartment.

"I'm glad you made a friend," Bucky says, "But did you really name our son after a book character?"

"Yep, and if we have any other kids, that's not going to change. Sorry, honey," I smile at him. He walks up behind me and wraps his arms around me. His real arm is tighter than the fake one.

"Do you do that on purpose?" I ask him.

"Do what?" he asks, his voice clearly confused. I really need to ask more specific questions.

"Your left arm is around me tighter than your right."

"You mean my fake arm. I guess I'm just a little bit cautious with the fake one. I don't want to hurt you. It's a little bit stronger than the real one."

"I know, but Bucky, you act afraid of it. You hardly touch me with it. I love all of you, Bucky. Even the metal part. Now you need to embrace the fact that it is part of you."

"I guess I still think of it as the Hydra part of me. Like it'll always be a reminder of who I was," he says.

"All that it is a reminder of is that you would have given your life to protect Steve and your country," I say, "And if it wasn't for Hydra, you would have died. Then what? I'd be alone and Toby wouldn't have a father. Yes, Hydra made you do awful things, but you shouldn't associate your arm with that. If you want I'm sure Stark could make you a new and improved one. But I like this Bucky."

"I'll stick with this one. I don't think what's left of my real left arm would appreciate it very much."

"Wait, it's not all gone?" I ask. I'd never thought about it.

"When they rescued me my arm was cut off above the elbow. I've seen the pictures and my file. Infection made them take more of it off. But yes, there is a little bit left. Not much though."

"Oh," I say, "I'm sorry I keep asking questions like this. I've always been curious about things. I guess that's why I wanted to be a scientist."

"You never told me that," he says, "I knew you were in college, but I had no idea what for."

"Biology," I say, "I wanted to be a biologist. At least until my writing career took off. Writing was my real dream."

"So why did you give it up?" he asked me.

"I can think of one reason," I say, "He's in his room asleep."

"Do you really think Tobias would want you to be the only thing standing in th way of your dream?"

"I guess not, but I have no idea what I'd even write about. I guess that's why I wasn't focused on that path."

"Write about our story. A single mother who lost her husband in the war and then a new love literally drops into her life and she falls in love slowly with him."

"That's a great idea," I smile, "I guess you get to be my muse, Bucky. You can keep me on track with everything. But Tobias still comes first."

"I know, honey. I wouldn't ask anything else of you," he kisses the top of my head and I turn around in his arms and press my lips to his. He kisses me back and I don't want him to stop I put my hand on the back of his neck to keep him from breaking away. We only part to breathe, then we're pressed back together. I part my lips and we're exploring each other's mouths. He maneuvers us to the couch without breaking apart. I settle on his lap and suddenly we're like two high school students making out in the basement of someone's house. It takes a little while for me to finally bring myself to pull away.

"Did I do something wrong?" he blinks.

"No, I just don't want to push things any further. Not yet," I say, "I'm waiting for the right time. And possibly a time when our son isn't sleeping upstairs."

"Right," he says. I move off of him, but I press close to his side and my head is on his shoulder. I know very well what side of him I'm on.

"Uh, Jess, you're umm…" he stammers.

"I know," I lace my fingers through the spaces between his metal ones, "I told you. I don't mind the fake arm. This is me embracing it." He didn't say anything. He just turned on Netflix and turned on _Supernatural,_ which was the latest thing that I go him into. I refused to answer any questions about the show, though. I told him to wait and find out. The episode that started was one of my favorites by far. It was the one where Sam and Dean get thrust into different shows by the 'trickster.' Bucky was very confused and I realized he probably hasn't seen most of the shows they were joking about.

A few days later I had my first therapy session. I left Gabi had gotten back the night before with the other Avengers, so I left Toby in their capable hands for a little while.

The therapist was one Agent Hill had pointed me towards. I called her and told her that I thought it would be good for both Bucky and I and she agreed and had given me the number of one that knew of SHIELD and that several agents have gone too. I wasn't sure how much I wanted to tell her. For now I'd just stick with the kidnapping thing.

We are in the waiting room when my name is called and then follow the therapist back into the room. I take a seat on the couch and Bucky sits down beside me.

"Hello Miss Arnold," she smiles at me, "Who is your companion?"

"Call me Jessica, please," I say, "And this is my boyfriend, Bucky. He's just here for moral support. I hope that's okay."

"That's fine. He can participate if he likes, but there is no pressure," she tells me, "My name is Amelia. Would you like to tell me about yourself and why you're here."

"Well, I just have a lot going on and I'm pretty stressed out," I tell her, "A few weeks ago I was kidnapped by a scientific organization that messed around with my genetics. I was terrified they wouldn't let me go. That they could use me for something. I was afraid I'd never see my friend and family again. Our son Toby turns one tomorrow and he is my life. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost him."

"How much time do you spend with your son?" she asks me.

"Most of it," I say, "I don't have a job. After an incident with SHIELD, they are giving me a lot of money."

"That's right. You and your friend were the time travel girls, weren't you. You've only been back about a year now."

"Yeah," I say, surprised she knew about that.

"What did you want to do before you had your adventure and your son?" she asks me.

"I wanted to be a writer," I say, "Bucky says that I still should be one. I just don't want to neglect my family."

"Honey, it wouldn't be neglecting," Bucky says, "I want you to be happy. I understand completely. You need to follow your dreams."

"I know, but what about you? What about your dreams? You've given them up too," I say, "You never told me what you want."

"I already have what I want. I served my country and now I have a beautiful girlfriend and an amazing son. That's all I could ever want." I blush at his comment.

"You have no idea how happy I am when you say things like that," I tell him.

"I'm just glad I can make you happy," he smiles at me.

"Of course you can. We're supposed to be together," I say, "I just know it."

"Well, it's clear you guys don't have any relationship problems," Amelia says, "So let's focus on the real problems. Now, what happened after you were rescued from the scientific organization?"

"I wasn't rescued. They let me go. They were done with me. I was dumped in a hospital by them. Then SHIELD took me in and checked me over thoroughly. It was like I was with the people who kidnapped me again. Except SHIELD kept me awake."

"That must have been stressful," she comments, "How did you feel?"

"A little violated. Angry at the people who had kidnapped me and worried about and missing my family."

After the hour of therapy, I feel better. We make the next appointment and go pick up Toby from Gabi.

"He really is a sweetheart," Gabi tells me, "I hope when I have kids they turn out that way."

"With Steve as a father, how could they not?" I smile.

"I don't know. You might have little Punks running around," Bucky jokes and he lifts a half asleep Tobias into his arms.

"Thank you for watching him," I say, "When are you leaving again?"

"Well, we found the guy we were looking for. I think we're fine now. Tony's having a party Friday night."

"Be careful. Don't do too much drinking. Although I bet you can't get drunk either," I say, "Given your serum."

"Yep. I'm part of that club," she said, "Along with my husband and your boyfriend. Well, I better go. I have training and whatnot. Bye." It's a little odd that she rushes us out so quickly. I wonder what's going on. It's probably not my business. We go back to the car and Bucky drives us home.

"I wonder what's up with Gabi," Bucky says, "She doesn't usually act like that. I should know. I practically raised her."

"If she wants to tell us, she can," I say, "If not, it's not our business. She's allowed to have her own private life."

"True," I say. We get home but I tell Bucy I have an errand to run and tell him to take Toby to bed. I leave and head out to do something that will make Bucky very happy, or at least I hope so.

The next day is Toby's birthday. The three of us celebrate it as a family rather than throwing another party. I make a point of wearing the dog tags outside of my shirt rather than under it like I usually have them. Bucky notices, but he doesn't say anything. I'm sure he just thought it was because today is a special day.

After I'm showered and dressed, I get Toby up and get him his usual breakfast - applesauce. Then I take him upstairs and give him a bath. Toby loves bathtime for some reason. I smile and playfully spike his blonde hair up into a mohawk with shampoo.

"Happy birthday, my little soldier," I tell him. I'm sure he doesn't understand, but that day back in 1946 changed my life for the better. I love my son so much and I'm glad that I found his daddy again when he was still a baby. I finish his bath and dress him up in a cute new outfit I got for his birthday and attach a ribbon to it that says 'I'm 1!'

"You're such a little cutie," I smile, "Today is going to be so much fun. Except you'll need another bath later, I'm sure. You'll probably get frosting in your hair."

"Being dirty builds character," Bucky smiles as he walks up to me as I exit the bathroom with Toby.

"Then what does being covered in frosting do?" I ask him.

"Makes you really sweet?" he suggests and we both laugh.

"Come on, let's head downstairs," I say, "We have a big day today. Hopefully no one kidnaps me from the zoo this time, though. Did you put his stroller in the cr last night like I told you to?"

"Of course I did," he says, "I always listen to you. Are we going to have lunch at the zoo?"

"Probably," I say, "I didn't pack a lunch this time. Come on, let's head out."

We take Toby to see the lions first, which gave him his third word.

"Kitty!" he exclaims when he sees the lions.

"Yes, Toby, those are really big kitties. They're called lions. Can you say lions?"

"Kitty!" he repeats and I just smile. He's too cute to not smile.

"Those are Daddy's favorite kind of kitties," Bucky smiles, "They're so big."

Toby end up loving the polar bears. They are the last animal we look at in the zoo and when we try to leave, Toby starts to cry.

"Toby, we can visit the polar bears another time, okay? We need to go home," I say, "We'll come back. I promise." I make a mental note to find a stuffed polar bear somewhere to give to Toby. I'm sure he would love that. However, I do let Toby watch the polar bears for another five minutes. He falls asleep before the time is up. Since he's asleep, Bucky and I go into the gift shop and get him a stuffed polar bear before we go home.

When he wakes up from his nap, I bring him downstairs so we can give him a few birthday gifts. We had decided a week before that we would only give him a few because he was still really little. We give him the polar bear first, which is a bit of a mistake. It's almost as big as he is. He wraps his little arms around it and won't let go.

"Don't you want your other presents, buddy?" Bucky asks, but he seems content with his polar bear.

"I guess we can give him the others later," I say, "Except for this." I pick up a small rectangular box and open it up, pulling out a little necklace with a dog tag on it. Bucky looks at it and frowns.

"If that's mine from the war, then how do you still have yours?" he asks me.

"Because I got a second one made," I say, taking my necklace off and putting it in his hand. It was exactly the same as the others, except for one thing. Steve's name was replaced with mine.

"See, I knew that if you go your tags after you met me, you would have used me as your next of kin. So I had a new one made so I could give one to Toby too. Toby has one of each too." The next two words out of his mouth are two that I will have trouble believing for quite a long time.

"Marry me."


	15. Chapter 15

**Good morning guys! I'm first class starts at 8 and the dining hall doesn't open until 7, so I thought I's post another chapter for you before I head down to breakfast.**

 **Shout-out: My awesome roommate and anyone still reading and/or reviewing this story**

 **Warnings: Cuteness!**

 **Disclaimer: I think you know by now.**

"What?" I whisper, not sure if I heard him right.

"Marry me," he repeats, then pushes himself up so he's on one knee. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a black box.

"What?" I ask again, blinking.

"Jessica, I can't imagine my life without you and Toby. You've kept me anchored to this world for a very long time. You gave me hope. Then, you took me and and took care of me while I was still trying to figure things out. You've never stopped believing in me. Yes, we've had our fights, but I think that this was meant to be. I can't wait to see where the road takes us next. All I know is I want you beside me. Forever." I feel my eyes water and I start to cry. I just stare as he opens up the box in his hand, which contains a beautiful ring.

"This was my mother's," he explains before I can say anything, "So, what do you say? Will you marry me?" I keep staring, forgetting how to talk. I nod, unable to do anything else. I feel like such an idiot right now.

"Yes," I finally manage to say the word and he takes my hand and slides the ring on.

"It fits perfectly," he smiles, "I guess it was made to be." I pull him close and kiss him, still crying for some reason. I can't believe that this is actually happening.

"Hey, don't cry," he says, pulling away a little bit, "This is what you deserve."

"But why? I feel like I don't. You're just so amazing and I'm just plain old me."

"I like who you are," he says, "You are not plain. You are the most kind, caring, compassionate person I know and you are an amazing mother and I can't imagine a life that I don't marry you in." I don't reply, I just bury my face in his muscular chest and I feel him stroke my back slowly with both of his hands. It takes me several minutes to calm down. I still can't believe this is happening.

"Mama? Toby asks. I turn my head to look at him and he's looking back at me, frowning.

"Mama's fine, Toby. And guess what? Mama and Dada are going to get married," I switch back to mother mode seeing my son's concern. I know he doesn't know what that means, but it brings back his smile. He drops his polar bear and crawls across the space between us and hugs me. I smile and settle him in my lap. Bucky moves so he is sitting next to me and takes my hand. I rest my head on his shoulder.

"I'm the luckiest person in the world," I say, "I have an amazing little boy and an incredible fiancé."

"I think I'm the lucky one," Bucky says, "I found a woman who will never give up on despite all the things I've done and been through."

"I think Toby is the luckiest, actually," I say, "He's got two parents that love each other and would do anything for each other because they have a unique life experience that very very few people will ever have."

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. I stand up and wipe my eyes, hoping they aren't red and puffy. I set Toby into Bucky's arms and go answer the door. I find two people on the other side.

"Rebecca, hi. And this must be Dr. Banner. It is nice to meet another Avenger. Come on in."

"Thank you," Rebecca says and the two step inside the apartment. I close the door behind them.

"I hope we're not interrupting anything," Dr. Banner says.

"No, not at all. Have a seat. Can I get you anything?" I ask.

"No thank you," Rebecca says and her father echoes that, "We really just came here to thank you for uniting us."

"Of course. When Gemini told me, I wasn't going to keep it to myself. Even if I didn't know you that well, Rebecca. You're my friend now. I'm glad you're happy."

"Thank you. That means a lot. We wanted to invite you guys out for dinner," Dr. Banner says, "I've heard a lot about you from my daughter and Gabi. I'd like to know more about you myself. I understand you are interested in science."

"Well, I was a biology major in college with a minor in writing," I say, "I couldn't decide. Life got in the way."

"Well, I could help with that. I could use a lab assistant that isn't quite so narcissistic," he says. I know who he is talking about immediately.

"You don't have to do that," I say, "I'm glad to help you out. You don't need to repay me."

"Hey, you helped me with my dream. Now I'm helping you with yours," he tells me.

"I'd be honored," I smile, "How could I turn down working for one of the greatest minds of the century?" Dr. Banner looks at his shoes. Clearly he isn't used to compliments. But I didn't mean it as one. I meant it as a fact.

"I think that's a great idea," Bucky says, "You spend way too much time in this apartment."

"What about you?" I ask, "You're in here a lot."

"I know that, but you know I'm not great in crowds. Especially without you," he stood, "Well, if we're going to go out for dinner, now's the time before it gets too busy and we have to wait around forever."

The five of us head to the restaurant we decided on. We take two cars because it would be hard to get all five of us into my car, especially with Toby's car seat. Toby insisted on bringing his polar bear into the car with him, so we let him.

"You could have told them that we were in the middle of something," Bucky says, "It wouldn't really be rude."

"I know, but I helped these people. And I just got a job. This is the least we can do. Get to know them. We can finish with Toby's stuff when we get home. He's only interested in the polar bear anyways."

"True," Bucky smiles, "This will be a cute story to tell. I still can't believe you did that dog tag thing."

"I can't believe that was enough for you suddenly ask me to marry you. How long have you been carrying around your mother's ring?"

"Just today, actually. I was going to ask you when we had cake," he says, "But I was really feeling it after what you did for me."

"It wasn't that big of a deal. I just wanted Toby to have a piece of you," I smile and laugh a little.

"What's funny?" he sounds puzzled.

"While I thought you were dead I was happy to be pregnant because I knew I would always have a little piece of you."

"Oh yeah. I read that in your journal. Look at how far you've come since then," he laughs, "Our lives are so complicated. It's like this is some weird story some crazy person is writing."

"I don't think anyone is crazy enough to think of something like this. I mean, look at all the awful stuff that has happened. They'd have to be a sadist or something."

"Maybe not. We're together now, aren't we? That's a good thing."

"Yeah. Although Gemini is still out there," she says, "The Avengers will stop them, though. And I want to help them do that."

"Isn't that a little dangerous? I don't want Toby to lose his mother."

"I don't want to lose Toby or some other baby," I say, "I want to make sure it's done right. So I'm going with them and I'm helping."

"Fine. I'll go with you. I have more fighting experience," Bucky says, "Someone needs to watch your back."

"Who will watch Toby?" I ask him, "If we're all busy fighting?"

"Laura? Or one of the other girls?" he suggests as we pull into the restaurant.

"That will work," I say. I get Toby out of his car seat and meet Bucky in the front of the car and take his hand with my free one. We walk into the lobby of the restaurant and find Rebecca and her father waiting for us.

"I already told them how many people we have," Dr. Banner says, "It'll be about a five minute wait, which isn't bad."

"Alright," I say, "Oh, this is Tobias, by the way." I tell him.

"Yes I've heard about him, too," he says, "Happy birthday, little guy." Toby smiles and giggles. He reaches out a little hand and grabs the doctor's nose and giggles louder. I make sure it isn't bothering him.

"May I?" he asks through his partially plugged nose. I nod and hand my son over. I know exactly who Dr. Banner is and what he turns into, but he is one of the most levelheaded people I've met and actually seems a little shy, to be perfectly honest.

"Hi there, buddy," he says, "You're a cute one, aren't you. I always used to want kids of my own." He bounces Toby slightly and gets him to let go of his nose. I feel a little sorry for him. I'm thinking it's not a good idea to have kids when you can turn into a giant green anger monster. He's great with Toby, though. I think he'd be a good grandfather. At least he has that to look forward to because of me. I'm really excited to work with him.

The hostess leads us to a table and gets a high chair for Toby. I settle him into it and then we look over our menus. This wasn't how I was planning for this evening to go, but that's alright. Maybe this is for the better. I smile to myself and glance over at Toby, who is trying (and failing) to play with his toes.

"Silly Toby," I smile, "Leave your toes alone." He doesn't seem to listen, but whatever. He'll get bored of it soon. I look back at the menu as the waitress comes over and we all order our beverages. I'm not quite sure what I want to eat, so I peek over to see what page Bucky is on. We don't really go out to dinner much. Maybe we will when Toby is a little bit older. I've never really liked when other people's kids are screaming in restaurants and I don't like it when people stare because it makes Bucky uncomfortable. He hardly leaves the house in short sleeves. It's annoying that people stare at other people because they are different.

"What are you looking at?" I ask him. The restaurant we're at is a Tex-Mex place.

"The quesadillas look pretty good," he tells me, "I never really have eaten much Mexican food before."

"Well, I love it. I love Tacos, even though they aren't technically Mexican. Although I was looking at the Chipotle style chicken."

"I didn't know you were into spicy foods," he tells me.

"There's a lot you still don't know about me. I'm not as much as an open book as you are, but I'm sure when we get married we'll learn a lot about each other."

"Wait, you two are getting married?" Rebecca asks, "Is that what we interrupted?"

"Don't worry about it. He had already given his speech and I'd already said yes and had the ring. We were just talking about it when you got there."

"You could have said something," Dr. Banner says, "We didn't mean to ruin your special night."

"The special night is the wedding," I say, "Well, the special day."

"I bet it'll be a special night too," Rebecca smirks, "If you know what I mean."

"They already have a child," Dr. Banner points out. Rebecca knew the truth about Toby's conception. I feel myself get warm and I'm sure I'm a dark shade of red. Bucky is trying to disappear into his menu. Rebecca just laughs.

"Rebecca told me she works with children," Dr. Banner says, "Did you know that?"

"No, I didn't," I say, glad for the change of subject, "I thought she was an agent."

"I am, I just also like to work with kids," she says, "If I didn't have powers, I'd be a teacher."

"That's interesting," I smile, "Remind me to put you on the list of potential babysitters. As long as you don't poison my son."

"I'll try not to," she jokes. The waitress brings our drinks over and we all order our dinner. I'm actually glad that we have new company. I love Bucky and my son, but there is only so much to talk about. Rebecca takes most of the paper off her straw and blows it, aiming towards me, but instead hits Bucky, who tries the same and ends up hitting Dr. Banner, who ends up somehow hitting Toby, who just giggles about it. I end up hitting Rebecca with mine, leaving me the only unskethed person.

"Can we be adults now?" Dr. Banner asked.

"Sorry Dr. Banner," I apologize, "But Rebecca started it!"

"Hey!" she exclaims.

"It's fine," he says, "And there is no reason to be so formal. Especially if we are going to work together."

"Sorry. I'm used to being formal with older people," then I realized what I said, "Not that you're old. I just meant that you're a lot older than me. Well, not a lot. God, I'm awful at talking to new people." Dr. Banner laughs, so assume I didn't offend him.

"Stark is going to love you," he says, "Although you may get annoyed with him very quickly. I do apologize in advance."

"I get to meet _the_ Tony Stark?" I ask, "Now I just need to meet Thor and I'll know all the Avengers."

"That can be arranged," Banner says, "I'm sure I can get you invited to the party on Friday."

"What do we do about Toby, though?" I ask, "He'd need a place to stay."

"Why don't you leave him with the usual sitter?" Banner asks. I'd forgotten that the Avengers, other than Nat and Gabi, didn't know about Laura and the kids.

"I could. Or I could find a neighborhood sitter," I say, "I don't think anyone is trying to hurt us right now."

"I could stay home with him," Bucky says, "You know I'm not good with crowds and am technically still missing. Although I'm sure most people thought I died in the Insight incident."

"Or when you fell off a train," I say.

"The fake arm gives away the fact that I was working for Hydra and tried to kill and have killed a lot of people. Including the director of SHIELD," Bucky talks quietly.

"Okay, fine," I say, "I won't stay out too late and you know that I don't drink anyways."

"I trust you," he says and squeezes my hand.

Dinner goes nicely and is very filling. All of us have leftovers by the end of it. We talked a lot and laughed a lot. I invite them back to our place for cake and they accept, so we all head back to the apartment to celebrate Toby's birthday.

"What time was he born?" Bucky asks me.

"6:32 pm," I say, "I went into labor in the early afternoon."

"I'm really sorry you had to go through it alone," he says, like he's said a million times before.

"Like I've said before, it probably wasn't very pleasant to watch, but you are more than welcome to watch the next one. After we stop Gemini."

"I'm more than willing to help you guys take down Gemini," Banner says, "But, after that, I think I'm done with the heroics. I'm getting too old for it and I'm tired of causing so much destruction."

"You don't have to help," I say, "I don't want you caught up in stopping another evil organization. Who knows where it will lead."

"I want to help," he says. I don't say anything. I stick a candle into the cake and light it. Bucky walks over with Toby in his arms.

"Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday dear Tobias

Happy birthday to you." We all sing. Toby isn't quite sure what's going on, but I take a picture of him and Bucky on my phone and one of them with the cake.

"Toby, can you blow out the candle?" Bucky asks, smiling. I'm actually surprised when he manages to do so with some instruction from Bucky.

"Put him in the high chair," I tell Bucky, who does exactly that. I cut the first piece for Toby and put paper plate onto his tray. I record with my phone as he sticks his left hand into the cake and eats it, getting frosting all over his hands and face in the process. Then I return to the cake and four pieces and we all enjoy the cake (but probably not as much as Toby. I found cake all over him at bathtime.)


	16. Chapter 16

**Hi guys! Just finished my first week of classes. College is a lot of walking, rapid note taking, and textbook reading, but the food is good. I'm about to do some writing on the sequel. I've just been crazy busy. Anyways, have another chapter.**

 **Warning:** ** _Age of Ultron_** **spoilers, fluffuness, drama**

 **Disclaimer: I do NOT own Marvel or the** ** _AOU_** **plotline**

"Whatever man, it's a trick," Clint complains as we all sit around a table. The party had been lot of fun, but all the other guests are gone now. The only people left are Natasha, Clint, Banner, Rebecca, Thor, Cap, Gabi, Tony, Rhodey, Dr. Cho, Hill, and myself. We had gotten onto the topic of Thor's hammer, of all things. Almost all of them are drunk, with the exception of Cap, who can't drunk, and Gabi and I, who hadn't had anything stronger than soda to drink.

"Please be my guest," Thor chuckles. His hammer is leaning against a pile of books on the table.

"You've had a tough week, Clint. We won't hold it against you if you can't get it up," Tony jokes and I roll my eyes. He is a little annoying.

One by one, the Avengers (plus Rhodey helping Tony), other than Natasha, try. Most of the others miss it, but Gabi and I exchange a look when Steve makes the Hammer move up a little bit. Thor looks concerned. I can tell right away that Cap knew he was lifting it and he acted like he couldn't.

"I bet Bucky could lift it," Cap says, "Too bad he's not here."

"Yeah, right," Tony says, "The former assassin?"

"Hey, Nat and I are assassins," Clint pointed out.

"Well, sorry to disappoint you, but my _fiancé_ is busy watching our one year old son."

"I know th - Wait. WHAT?" Cap asks, "Fiancé?"

"Yes," I say casually, but I know all the attention is on me now.

"Since when?" Gabi asks, "Can I see the ring?"

"Since Toby's first birthday," I say, holding out my hand.

"How did he do it?" Clint asks. He's like a brother to me, so of course he'd want to know.

"We had gone to the zoo for Toby's birthday and found out he loves polar bears. He fell asleep before we left the zoo, so we stopped and got him a stuffed one. Then after his nap, we brought him downstairs to open his gifts. Except we made the mistake of giving him the polar bear first. He wouldn't let go of it. We decided to wait to give him the rest, but I wanted to give him one first," I realize this story is going a little slow, but it seems everyone, with the exception of Tony, who is still trying to figure out the hammer, is listening intently. I pull out my dog tags from under my shirt and lift them over my head, "See, Bucky had given me his dog tags after Steve had returned them to him. So, I found a place that makes dog tags and I had a set made, but I replaced Steve's name with mine for next of kin. I took one of the old ones off mine and replaced it with a new one. So Toby and I have matching tags. When Bucky heard what I did, he just immediately said 'marry me.' He gave me the speech after, but I was really surprised."

"I knew he was thinking about it, but he never told me he actually did it," Steve says, "Congratulations."

"Well, two people in this circle already knew," I say, glancing over at Rebecca and Banner, "Because a certain father and daughter showed up not 5 minutes after to thank us and take us to dinner."

"Wait, you two are related?" Clint looks between the pair.

"Yeah. Gemini told Jess about it when they had her captive," Rebecca tells them, "So she told me and I found him."

"And now I work for Dr. Banner," I say.

"Gemini?" Thor asks, "What's Gemini?"

"Another evil scientific organization specializing in genetics," I explain, "They had Rebecca as a kid before Coulson and Hill rescued her and raised her."

"Thank you for that, by the way," Banner tells Hill.

"Not a problem. She was a good kid," Hill smiles.

"I think literal translation is 'he whoever hold Thor's fingerprints,'" Tony grumbles, giving up.

"Or, it's simple. You're all not worthy," Thor says, picking up the hammer with ease. Suddenly, there is a loud screeching noise and I cover my ears.

"Worthy? How could you be worthy?" A badly beaten up robot walks towards us, "You're all puppets tangled in strings."

Next thing I know, we're being attacked by evil robots. I try my best to get out of the way. Most of the Avengers are weaponless at the moment, but they do their best. They manage to take down the robots before anyone is badly hurt. As soon as it is safe, I decide to leave and head home.

When I get there, Bucky is on the couch, watching Netflix.

"Honey, it's almost 2 am. Why are you still up?" I ask.

"I was waiting for you," he told me, "I wanted to make sure you got home safely."

"Well, I did almost get killed by evil robots," I say, "I left as soon as they were all taken down."

"Evil robots?" Bucky asks, "That's something I thought I'd never see. Not literal robots, anyways. You should get some sleep. Sounds like you've had a busy night." I nod and head upstairs, Bucky right behind me. Even though we are engaged, we still don't share a room. I haven't said anything and Bucky's still a little too old fashioned. I reach my door and put my hand on the knob, but then turn.

"Bucky, can you stay with me tonight?" I ask him, "The robots kind of freaked me out."

"Of course, Love," he says, "Let me just go change first."

"Alright," I head into the bathroom and brush my teeth and wash my face. Then I go into my room and change out of my party clothes and into my comfy _Frozen_ pajamas that have Elsa on them. I take the extra decorative pillows off my bed and put them in a neat pile on the floor. Normally I just throw them onto the floor, but I feel like I should do something different. There is a knock on my door.

"You don't need to knock. Just come in," I say and the door opens and Bucky steps into my room. A very shirtless Bucky. I can't help but look.

"Sorry. If you're uncomfortable, I can go put a shirt on," he says, shifting on his feet, "It's a habit."

"No, it's fine," I sit on my bed, "Come here." He walks over and sits down beside me on the bed. I pull back the covers and lay down, only replacing the sheet over me. I have my fan going - it's the only way I can sleep. Bucky follows me lead. I face the wall and I feel him put his arm around me. He's on the side of the bed I'm used to being on, but I switched knowing that he'd be more comfortable this way.

"I won't let anyone or anything hurt you," he promises.

"I know," I yawn and press further into his body and quickly fall into sleep.

As always, I don't find out what Avengers are up to until I see it on the news almost two weeks later. They are in a country called Sokovia. I'm not quite sure where that is, but apparently breaking news was coming from there where a whole city (yes, a whole city) was being lifted up into the air. I have to do a double take.

"BUCKY?" I call, wondering where he is.

"Yeah?" his voice comes from upstairs.

"You should probably come see this," I say as I watch footage of the city. He rushes downstairs and to my side.

"What's wr-" he stops when he follows my finger, which is pointing at the television.

"How is that even?" he doesn't finish his question.

"I have no idea," I say, "Who could figure out how to lift an entire city up into the air? And why?"

"I wonder if this has anything to do with the other stuff that has been happening. Like Hulk and Tony destroying part of that other city."

"I guess we'll have to wait for our friends to come back. I hope they are all okay," I sigh, "How's the location search going?" Bucky and I are trying to pick a venue for our wedding so we can pick a date. I want a May wedding, so we have a little under a year to plan this whole thing out.

"I've looked at a few places. I wonder if Tony will let us use his property in Malibu for our honeymoon," Bucky says, "Unless you want to go someplace else."

"I know where we can get married!" I exclaim as I come up with the perfect idea.

"Where?" Bucky asks me.

"At the zoo!" I smile, "It'll be perfect. Plus, it's different and fun."

"That's a great idea. I'll look into it later," he settles beside me on the couch and we listen to reporters, wishing we knew what is going on and if our friends are okay. It's just a plain old waiting game.

A while later a giant helicarrier appears in the sky and little plane type things land on the city, which is really high up at this point. I can only assume that they are evacuating the city, which hopefully means this is almost over. except for the fact that they'll still have a floating city. Then, my jaw drops as the city starts falling back down towards earth. Bucky is busy feeding Toby, but he drops the spoon.

"This is really bad," I say, "The impact could wipe out the whole planet. It could cause an extinction like with the dinosaurs."

"I'm sure they have a plan. The Avengers always save the day," Bucky says, but I can tell he's scared. I'm terrified. I don't want to die now. I watch the action and hardly blink as the city falls further and further. And then explodes while it is still in the air. I wrap my arms around Bucky and put my head on his shoulder. He rubs my back.

"We're safe," he whispers, "The world is safe. Everything is going to be okay." His voice is soothing, but I'm still worried about my friends.

"What if they're dead?" I whisper, "What if they sacrificed themselves to save the world?"

"I'm sure some of them made it onto those planes alive," he says, "We just have to wait."

The waiting game is awful. I have Bucky stay with me another night before I request that we make the change permanent and we spend the following day moving his stuff into my - our - room. I also keep Toby in my sight all the time unless he is up in his room sleeping. It's three days before we hear anything. The nights are agonizing and neither of us sleeps very well. I can hardly eat. All I do is make sure Toby is cared for and stare at a lot of walls. Bucky isn't much more active. His best friend was on that island. I'm friends with most of the Avengers.

Relief comes with a phone call from Agent Hill telling me to bring Bucky and Toby to the Avengers mansion. I relay this to Bucky as I hurry to put my shoes on. He does the same and I get Toby and his bag and then slip his little shoes on. Bucky grabs the keys and we hurry off to find out what is going on.

When we get inside, the Avengers are sitting around the living room. Nobody was killed and there are three new people in the group. Everyone has varying injuries. Cap and Gabi are sitting close together, holding hands. Both are scraped up, but that's the full extent of their injuries. On a bigger couch, Hawkeye is sitting beside Natasha, who has Banner's arm around her and is leaning against him. Rebecca, who has a broken arm which is encased in purple plaster, is beside her father. On a third couch is a new girl with dark hair with a red-purple colored guy beside her. At the girl's feet sits a blond guy who looks pretty banged up. Tony,Thor, and Hill occupy the final couch.

"Hi," is all I can manage.

"Who is this?" the dark haired girl asks in what I think is a Russian accent.

"That's my friend, Jess," Gabi responds, "Beside her is her fiancé, Bucky, and the boy is their son, Toby. Jess, meet Wanda and Pietro Maximoff, also known as the Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver. Beside Wanda is Vision."

"Well, nice to meet you," I smile at the three new additions.

"You got here quick," Hill says, "I didn't call you that long ago. I figured you would want to see for yourself that everyone is okay."

"Well, I was worried," I say, "Bucky and I watched the city fall from the sky. It was scary. We've been waiting for news."

"Well, we all made it through," Rebecca says, "Although Pietro almost died. Dr. Cho managed to save him with her tissue regeneration machine. He'll be as good as new in no time."

"He saved me," Clint says, "I can think of at least three people who are glad about that."

"You mean your formerly secret family?" Tony asks.

"It wasn't that much of a secret," I say, "If I knew about it. Plus Gabi and Nat knew. Good kids though. His wife watches Toby sometimes."

"You told Jess before you told us?" Tony asks, clearly hurt.

"Well, to be fair, Jess guessed it. I didn't tell her. I just told her she was right," Clint explains.

"Yeah, he was helping me shortly after Toby was born, He looked after me my first day back and he was good at all this baby stuff. It didn't take long for me to figure it out."

"Still, a team needs to know stuff about each other," Tony says, "How can we trust each other if we have huge secrets. Anyone else have a secret family?"

"Well…" Hill starts, but I'm not sure it she's joking or not.

"I have a boyfriend," Rebecca says suddenly, obviously if her adoptive mother has a secret, she doesn't want to know or doesn't want her mother to tell it, "His name is Noah."

"What's he look like?" Tony asks.

"What kind of job does he have?" Clint asks simultaneously

"Can we meet him?" I chime in.

"Here's a picture of him," she passes around her phone. The picture is taken by a lake. A third person must have taken it. The man standing beside Rebecca in the photograph is tall - taller than my 6 foot, probably - with sandy blond hair and eyes that remind me of melted chocolate.

"Well, he mostly works overseas where there is war," she says, "He specializes in making sure civilians - especially children - get out of dangerous situations to minimize casualties."

"Sounds like a good guy," Bucky says, looking at the guy before I pass the phone over to the next person, "How did you meet?"

"Through school, technically. There was this other girl, Nicole, who was taken in by other SHIELD agents because from a young age, she had the power to mentally hurt anyone she wanted. We went to the same school, and because of abilities, we grew close. We were actually roommates for a while. Then something went wrong with her powers and -." Rebecca didn't have to finish the sentence, "I met her older brother, Noah, shortly after she died. We became close, comforting each other. Then it turned into something more and we've going strong for three years now." The whole room was quiet for a while.

"I'm so sorry for your loss," a new voice says, and I realize it is Vision talking. His voice sounds as smooth as butter. He should be one of those people who reads books on tapes. I would listen to them all the time.

"Thank you," Rebecca smiles sadly. It's very clear that the passing of a few years have not made her miss her friend any less.

"Agent Hill, what were you about to say before your daughter interrupted?" Tony asks. Rebecca has lost. She may have distracted most of us, but Tony is insistent.

"Right," she reached around her neck, which has a chain I've never noticed before. I was expecting some sort of pendant, but when the chain was pulled out fully from under her shirt, there is a wedding ring on it.

"You're married?" Cap asks.

"Yeah. We needed to keep it quiet. Especially after he 'died.'

"Mom, you shouldn't have told them," Rebecca says, "You know the more people that know a secret, the less of a secret it is. You or Dad could be used as leverage on the other."

"I know that, sweetie, but the only people really left are Gemini, and they aren't after your father and I." Lucky. It's awful to be so worried about something like Gemini all the time. I just hope we can stop them before it's too late.

"Wait, Steve and Gabi are married, right?" Wanda asks.

"Yeah, why?"

"Well, if this Gemini is after special children-" she doesn't need to finish, because someone else does for her.

"Then I can't get pregnant either," Gabi says, "They'd go after our child too. The only problem is, it's already too late." I get what she's saying immediately. So do Clint and some of the others. I can see it in their faces. I watch Steve for about a minute before he realizes what's going on and his face is priceless. We have a time window now to get Gemini. And it's way smaller than any of us are comfortable with.


	17. Chapter 17

**Hi guys! I've been a little busy, so I apologize for the delay. I'm sitting down now to do some writing on the sequel. Anyways, enjoy chapter 17!**

 **Shout-out: My bestie/roomie/editor**

 **Warnings: Cute Jess/Bucky stuff, fangirling, and a huge surprise**

 **Disclaimer: All of my wonderful readers would have seen the** ** _Civil War_** **trailer by now.**

I do start working for Banner and Stark in the lab, but it's not very much of science right now as it is trying to find a ghost. We only had the name Jefferson to go by, and there is no way to know if that is a first name or a last name. We have nothing to go on.

"Banner, why don't you take Jess to where they had her before and see if you can find anything," Stark tells him.

"Didn't that building get blown up?" I ask, "And hasn't SHIELD picked through it already for clues?"

"There wasn't much SHIELD to go through it, so no. Plus, we didn't know that we'd have so little time to do this," Tony says, "Even when I heard your and the man who killed my parent's news, I thought we at least had a few more years. Though, I am proud of Cap for finally getting laid."

"Stark, do you really think it's a good idea to talk like that?" I ask him, angry, "My Bucky didn't do anything. He's like your friend Dr. Banner over here. You can't blame him for his Winter Soldier missions any more than you can blame Dr. Banner for what the Other Guy does."

"Come on, Jess, let's go," Banner grabs my arm gently. I hadn't realized until then how into Tony's face I was. No one talks about my family like that, though. Especially not snotty, overgrown, bratty, rich kids who think they're better than everyone else. However, as much as I would like to say this, I have years of practice biting my tongue. I glare at Stark as I follow Banner out of the lab.

"How do you put up with that asshole?" I ask him in the car.

"I just ignore it. Tony likes getting a reaction out of people and pushing their limits," he says, "I wish Pepper was around more. She's the only one that can control him."

"I imagine you've mastered the whole 'staying calm' thing because of the Other Guy," I say as we drive along through the New York traffic.

"You know, you don't have to come with me to this place," he tells me, "I can take you home. It might be a little much going back there after everything."

"I think I can handle it," I say, "My friends' kid might be in danger now. We need to track down Gemini and take them out before Gabi has her baby."

"You're a great friend, you know that?" he says, "It's hard to find people that loyal these days."

"Well, it's about the only personality trait I've got, so I better be good at it," I mutter.

"I don't think that's true. You're also caring. Smart. A good mother," he says.

"Anyone can be those things," I point out.

"Yeah, but not everyone is," he responds, "Not everyone gets two amazing parents that would do anything for them."

"What happened to your parents?" I ask, "Sorry, that's none of my business. I guess curiosity is another trait of mine."

"That's good for a scientist. And it's alright. I'll tell you the story. My father was trying to recreate the formula used on Steve. He combined animal DNA. Finally he got a combination he thought would work. Except the military wouldn't let him test it on humans. So he injected himself with it. It didn't affect him much, but then my mother got pregnant. He had a feeling it would impact me, and he was right. Bad things happened when I got upset as a child. One day when I was a kid, they shut down my father's program. So he set off the gamma radiation, which destroyed the lab. He came home before it actually happened when there were alarms blaring. He and my mother were arguing in another room. He came out, I guess to kill me, but killed her on accident. He was arrested and I was put with foster parents and adopted." I'm not sure how to respond to his story. The poor guy has been through way too much in his life. 'Sorry' seems too pathetic to say. So I don't say anything for a while, but the silence is defining.

"So, you and Natasha?" I ask, trying to break the silence.

"That obvious, huh?" he laughs, "I guess I'm pretty clueless when it comes to women. She had to just about say that she liked me before I figured it out."

"That's alright. I'm awful at the whole love thing too," I say, "I messed up so much back in the 40's. Yet, he kept coming back to me. Love is weird. All that matters is that you're happy, though. Are you happy?"

"As happy as I'll ever be," he says, "the accident that turned me made me unable to have kids. I told Nat that, but she doesn't care. It's not like she's the settling down type anyways."

"You never know," I say, "People can surprise you sometimes."

"Yeah, I know. I have no idea why she likes me," he says, "I'm not much."

"You're the smartest person I know. You're easy to talk to. You're not loud and annoying," I say, "Plus, even after everything you've been through, you aren't bitter and you haven't given up. I think you're a great person."

"Thanks," he blushes, " Basically you like me because I'm the opposite of Tony."

"Not true," I say, "Tony does have some good qualities. Just a few."

We arrive at the blown up building and start going through the rubble. The whole thing looks like a lab, or at least it used to.

"This place used to be an animal shelter," Banner says from the opposite side of the building. We're both wearing gloves and being very careful to avoid getting hurt.

"I didn't know that," I say, "I just knew it as a lab."

"It's weird to think about how many of the people on the team are genetically enhanced. Steve, Gabi, Nat, Rebecca, the twins, myself, you, and Bucky. Who knows who else they'll go after if we don't stop them."

"I can't afford to think like that," I say, "They want my second child. Plus, I don't get any cool powers."

"We should get samples from all of the enhanced and compare them. See what we can find," Banner says, "It might be interesting."

"I don't know how my Bucky will react to being a lab rat again," I say, "I'm not sure I want to be one again either."

"Right. Sorry. Maybe in the future," he says, "Hey, I know this is kinda weird, but I'm supposed to have a date Saturday, but I can't think of anything creative."

"Well, my default is the zoo," I say, "You can use that. Unless you're looking for something more private. I know the perfect little picnic spot in Central Park. Not many people know about it. I'll write down directions."

"That would be nice," he says, "I owe you one."

"I think we're even now," I say, "Hey, I found something." Banner hurries over and we push some rocks to discover a semi melted filling cabinet.

"This could be useful," I smile, "Who knows what's in here?"

We spend the whole day until the light is fading before we head back to the lab. We unload our finding.

"I need to go home," I say, "You and Tony can analyze the samples and start going through the files."

"Alright. See you in the morning," Banner smiles, "Thanks for all your help."

"It's no trouble," I smile. I head back to the elevator. I go down and out.

"Goodnight, Miss Arnold," FRIDAY tells me as I step out of the elevator. I go back out the front door and head to the subway station to go home. A guy in the car I'm in keeps sneezing and coughing. I sit as far away as I can from him. I end up between teen lovers and a guy with a guitar that smells like pot. Great.

It's dark by the time I get home. I don't see Bucky, so I plunk down onto the couch, exhausted. It's been a long day. Whatever was going on in the kitchen earlier still smells pretty good.

"Honey?" a voice asks as I hear footsteps heading down the stairs.

"Sorry I was out so late," I say, "Were you doing some cooking?" I get my answer when he appears in front of me, his hair laced with white stuff.

"Why do you smell like fire, chemicals, cologne, and pot?" he ask, "Interesting day?"

"You have no idea," I say, "Banner and I sifted through the remains of the building Gemini had me in. Hence the chemicals and fire. I took the subway home. How do you know what pot smells like?"

"We did have fun back in the 40's," he says, "I mean, I never did, but I knew some people."

"Two questions: Why do you have flour in your hair? And do I want to go into my kitchen?"

"I tried my hand at baking," he says, "The kitchen is clean, don't worry."

"You need a bath," I say, playing with his long hair, "And a little bit of a haircut."

"I think you need a bath worse," he says, "I thought you liked my hair long. Did you change your mind?"

"It's almost longer than mine, Bucky. You need to lose a few inches. Of course you're more than welcome to cut it short. I don't dictate what you do with your hair," I say, "I'll be quick. I won't use up all the hot water. I promise."

"I believe you," he says, "Cold showers can be good too." I smirk a little at this and he turns red. I don't think he expected me to understand.

"I didn't mean it like that!" he exclaims.

"Sure you didn't," I go upstairs and take a quick shower. I scrub my skin until it is almost raw, hoping I smell like soap. Then I put on my comfy pajamas and go back downstairs to find Bucky with _Clockwork Prince_ open.

"I love Jem," I smile, sitting down beside him, "He's smart, gentle, compassionate, and still kicks demon butt. He kind of reminds me of you, now that I think about it."

"I didn't know I fought demons," he jokes, "Is the other reason the fact that we have the same name? A name that we both hate?"

"Why are you so against your name, James?" I tease him.

"Careful. Or you'll have flour in your hair too," he threatens.

"Why did your parents name you after a crappy president who was in charge a century before you were born?"

"I honestly have no idea," he says, "He was a pretty terrible president. Although, at least they didn't name me something like Abraham Lincoln Barnes."

"Or George Washington Barnes," I joke, "What would your nickname be then? Washy?"

"That would have been awful," he laughs, "I think the name George is better than that. But just a little."

"Who was president when you were born? Wilson? Imagine of you were named after him."

"Oh God, I would have to change my name," he says, "Woodrow Wilson Barnes. That just sounds awful."

"Then you'd get called Woody. Which can either be a _Toy Story_ reference or something really inappropriate."

"It just got worse," he laughs, turning a little pink.

"So, how on earth did you decide to use a nickname of your middle name rather than your first?"

"People called me James when I was a kid, but I absolutely hated it for some reason. Then they tried calling me by my middle name, but what kid wants to be called Buchanan? It sounds like some kind of foot disease. So, they shortened it."

"It does kinda sound like a foot disease, doesn't it?" I smile, "Want to tell me what you did in my kitchen?"

"Oh, we made cookies," he stands up and offers me a hand. I take it and stand beside him, then follow him into the kitchen, "Well, I made cookies. Toby made a mess."

"Well, did you expect decent cooking from a one year old?" I ask, "How long did it take you to clean him off?"

"Well, let's just say I'm sorry if you find any more flour on him or in his hair," he says, "I think cleaning the kitchen took less time." He opens a plastic container and offers me a cookie. I take one and slowly take a bite.

"I didn't poison them, you know," he says, "I don't have access to that kind of stuff. Anymore."

"Wow, this is really good," I say, my mouth full of cookie.

"See, I told you," he says, "Come on, let's go upstairs."

I follow Bucky up the stairs and into our room. He takes a quick shower while I play a game on my phone. I try not to think of him just behind a door, taking a shower. Definitely not proper thought. Plus, we both know we aren't ready for that step yet. I put all of my concentration into my game.

I don't notice he's out into I feel him lay down beside me on the bed. I set my phone down and scootch closer to him. He puts his arm around me and I smile.

"I know this is a dumb question, but why doesn't your fake arm rust?" He doesn't answer me. Instead he just laughs at the question.

"Good night, Love," he whispers and I fall asleep.

In the morning, I find Tony and Banner in the lab, exactly where I left them, wearing the same clothes that they had on the night before. They each have a file open on the desk in front of them and piles are stacked around the room.

"Do you guys want coffee or something?" I ask them. Banner looks up, startled to see me.

"Why are you back so soon? I thought you were going home," he says, "What about your family?"

"I did go home. And I slept next to Bucky. Then I had breakfast and came back to work. It's 8 in the morning."

"We've been working all night?" Banner asks.

"It happens," Tony says, "Grab a file and see what you can find." I pick up the next file from the pile marked 'To read.' I take a seat and read through it.

I read file after file about people they did stuff to do. All the files are about girls, so I can only assume that the guys are another drawer or they were another cabinet. I am disgusted about how many people died during the experiments. Most of them are homeless or runaway teens and adults. They wrote down where the bodies were buried and I started writing down the coordinates of where they were originally taken from and then where the body is buried.

"This is disgusting," Banner says, "What is wrong with these people?" He tosses another finished file onto the 'Unsuccessful Experiments' pile. That pile is a lot bigger than the one with the survivors.

"We should have someone interview the survivors for information," Tony says, "Maybe Rebecca and Steve? People seem to think they're easy to talk to."

"The twins, too," I say, "But keep them together. Wanda keeps her brother anchored and visa versa."

"Good idea. Once we finish going through the files we can get them on that," Banner says.

"We can also take the coordinates of where people were taken and where they were buried to see if we can find a pattern of where they have come and where they are going."

"That's a great idea," Banner says, "Fresh minds are a good thing."

"Tony, can you get me a file while you're at it?" I ask when I see him move back towards the cabinet. He grabs two and hands me one on the way back to his spot. I open it up and am met with a familiar face.

"Hey, this file is about Rebecca," I say, "God, these people are worse than I thought. Doing this to a little ki-"

"What's wrong?" Banner asks when I pause.

"She has a twin brother," I whisper.

"What? What's his name?" Banner asks, rushing to my side.

"Jefferson."


	18. Chapter 18

**Hi guys! This story is almost done! I'm excited for you guys to see how it ends.**

 **Shout-out: To anyone who is still reading this. Thanks for sticking with me.**

 **Warnings: Violence an language**

 **Disclaimer: Do I really need to tell you?**

We brought Rebecca into the tower to talk to her about what we had found out from her file.

"Does the name Jefferson mean anything to you?" I ask her, sitting across from her in the kitchen.

"I think you already know the answer to that question," she answers in a tone much sharper than I usually expect from her. , "If you're asking that."

"Just answer my question, please," I say.

"Yes. Jefferson is my twin brother. He works for Gemini," she says, rolling her eyes at my insistence.

"Why does he work for them?"

"Because he's ordinary. They tried the same torturous experiments they did on me with him. It didn't work. In fact, it nearly killed him. He told them he didn't want to leave. That he wanted to help out with the experimenting."

"And they let him?"

"Yeah, they did. Gemini had adopted us remember? They couldn't just kick him out," she says.

"Have you talked to him since then?" I ask her. I feel like I'm interrogating her, which doesn't seem right.

"Yes. A few years ago I located him and reached out. He wouldn't listen to me. I told him I could get him out of Gemini, but he had no interest in leaving," she explains, "It's like he wants to prove that he's not useless by trying to make Gemini realize their goals."

"I'm really sorry," I say, "If it comes down to it, will you be able to take him down in the battle? You may not be able to hesitate."

"Trust me, I feel no loyalty to him," she almost growls, "He kept insisting that Gemini do more experiments on me. He wanted to make me even more powerful."

"That's awful," I say, "My brother and I have never got on very well, but I doubt he'd want to hurt me."

"How did you find out about my brother? If I can ask questions now."

"Banner and I found a filing cabinet underneath the wreckage of Gemini's lab."

"Which means they wanted you to find out something," she says, "They wouldn't have left it behind if they didn't."

"I had a feeling that was the case," I sigh, "Regardless, what they did to all those kids and teens is repulsive. Once we get a lead, we're going to take them down. I have Tony and Bruce working something right now."

"I'm sure you'll find them eventually. The three of you are pretty smart apart, but together you may be unstopable."

"I certainly hope we can beat them," I say, drinking a glass of milk.

"Fighting isn't their thing. They're better at evasion from detection," she says, "That's why they need an army. I have no idea how many of their experiments were successful. I doubt the files you found have any of the people that the experiments worked well on that they kept."

"I know. But the Avengers, new and old, you, Bucky, and myself should be able to take them down," I say, "And protect Gabi's child and my future children. As well as yours in the more distant future."

"That's the goal."

"I'm sorry this has to happen this way," I tell her, "But I'm glad you told me instead of telling me to go screw myself or something."

"I just hope we can take the bastards down and get your safety and life back," she says, "I've got to go. I volunteer at the local elementary schools on Tuesday afternoons."

I go back to the boys, who are playing connect the dots on a giant map of the world that now has a bunch of dots on it.

"Any luck?" I ask, walking over.

"We just finished plotting the points. We tried connecting them chronologically, but it doesn't have any sort of pattern that we can pick up," Tony says.

"Did you try connecting the dots by the alpha order of the names?" I ask them.

"Good idea. FRIDAY, can you try that?" Tony asks. Digitally the lines connect in my suggested way, but there was nothing. I stare at the map for a few minutes. Then I get an idea. I grab the sharpie and a ruler and start tracing between the dots.

"G - e - m - i - n - i," I spell out, "The dot is missing on the second i. That's where they're going to be. Something big is going to happen. FRIDAY, get the team here. Now. Code red."

"Right away, Miss Arnold," she tells me.

"Pepper is here. Tell Barnes that he can bring Toby here and she can look after him," Tony says.

"Are you sure Pepper is okay babysitting?" I ask him, "I don't want to intrude."

"Lately she's been really interested in making me visit children's hospitals in my suit. She goes with me. I'm sure she'll be fine with it. FRIDAY, ask Pepper."

"Yes, sir," FRIDAY replies, then a minute later, "Miss Potts says she'd be more than happy to look after young Mr. Barnes."

"Tell her I say thank you," I say.

Steve is the first to meet us up in the war room. Followed by Pietro then Wanda and Vision together. Nat comes in and sits down beside Banner. Hawkeye sits on her other side. Bucky appears after he drops Toby off. Rebecca smells a little like elmer's glue and crayons. Falcon and Rhodey are the last two there. Everyone is suited up.

"The floor is yours, Miss Arnold. You're the genius in all of this."

"Right," I say, "As you can see from the map on the table, the places they've been across the globe spells out Gemini. The second i is missing its dot. We've figured out where that would be. They're in Iceland right now. That's where we need to go. Now, they left us clues, so we have to expect them to be waiting to ambush us. This is the big battle. The ultimate fight to end this repulsive organization that has ended and severely altered the lives of hundreds of innocent children and teens. They have their army. We need to take them down."

"When do we leave?" Pietro asks after the room is silent for a moment.

"Let's go now," Tony says.

"Shouldn't we come up with a plan?" Steve asks, "Figure out what we're doing? And I don't feel good bringing an untrained civilian into this battle."

"This is about me and my family," I growl, "I'm going with you. Give me a gun. I'm sure I can figure out how to use it."

"I'll stay with her," Bucky says, "We probably have to split into teams anyways. Who knows how big this place will be?"

"Good idea," Cap says, "We can figure out partners on the plane. Ready to go?" Everyone agrees and we head over to the jet. It's a really nice jet, of course, because Stark only likes the best. I take a seat and Bucky settled down beside me.

"I really wish you weren't insisting on joining us," he says, "But I understand why you want to do this."

"This is about us," I tell him, "You know that. They threatened Toby. I can't let them get away with that."

"I know, that, honey," he says.

"You're my twin, I should be your partner!" I hear Pietro somewhere behind us..

"Sorry, big bro, but I already have a partner. So find another one. There are others left," Wanda is settled next to Vision. Pietro grumbles and moves away from her.

"I'll be your partner," Clint says, "I've been replaced too." I turn my head to see Nat glares at Clint from her spot next to Banner, who looks nervous. Falcon is talking to Cap from the seat beside him. Rhodey and Tony are in front of them, talking about who knows what.

"Rebecca, why don't you join us?" Bucky asks, seeing the girl alone.

"Bucky could use some trained help," I say, "Plus you can't be on your own."

"Alright," she says, "I hope we stop these assholes."

It doesn't take as long as I thought it would to get there. We all stick our comms into our ears and make sure we're all on the same channel before we exit the jet and head towards the building.

"Alright, FRIDAY scanned the building. Rhodey and I will go in through the roof," Tony says, "There's doors on both sides of the building, as well as the back. Also, she found an underground entrance."

"Not it!" most of the teams say at the same time, but Wanda is too slow and obviously Vision doesn't know the game. She mutters something in Russian and they head towards the entrance, which I'm assuming was through a sewer.

"Well take the east side," Bucky says.

"We've got west," Clint says.

"Guess that leaves us the back, big guy," Nat says, "No getting angry yet, though. We don't know what we'll find. I may need a scientist." Banner just nods and we head in our respective directions (some of us faster than others.)

We head in the east door and follow a corridor to find what looks like a high tech jail, but all the cells are empty. I'm not sure I want to meet what was in the cells if they had to be this advanced to keep the prisoners in.

"This reminds me of what Banner told me about Loki's cell on the helicarrier," I whisper.

"They're standard cells," Rebecca informs me, "They had an … incident while I was there. Very messy business. Sometimes people don't like it too much when you try to control them after you poke and prod them."

"I can understand that," Bucky says, "So how do you think they got these people to work for them?"

"Excellent question," a voice comes from behind us and I whirl around quickly. A man that looks a lot like Banner is standing a few yards away, with two companions at his side. The girl couldn't have been more than 13 and the boy looked about 16.

"Jefferson," Rebecca growls, "I'd like to say it's nice to see you again, but unfortunately for you I always tell the truth.."

"Don't be bitter, dear sister," he smiles, "I'd like you to meet two of my friends. You see, the experiments worked quite well on them."

"How'd you get them to be your puppets?" I ask him, "I thought you were just another lab tech."

"Hahaha," he chuckles, "Foolish girl. Shouldn't you be off screwing your friend there so you can keep your son safe? Maybe we'll just kill him once we're done."

"Why you little!" I yell and then curse at him a few times. I could have gone on, but Bucky put a hand on my shoulder.

"Surely you know that you'll lose," Bucky says to Jefferson, "You don't know how to fight."

"That's why I have them," he smirks, "Lily! TJ! You know what to do." I watch in awe as the girl transforms on his command into a wolf. The boy turns into a polar bear, of all things.

"That's right. Your little boy loves polar bears. Let's see how much he likes them after one kills both of his parents. The three of us back up a few steps as the animals approach us. Jefferson stands in the same spot, a giant smirk on his face. I wish I could go slap it off. The wolf charges at me, but Bucky goes after it and gets locked into a battle with it. I watch the polar bear walk towards me. I try to remember what I know about polar bears. Somehow I don't think all the 'playing dead' or 'trying to scare it off by looking bigger' stuff is going to work on a shapeshifter that was trained by evil scientists. I study my surroundings and grab the first thing I find: a fire extinguisher. I'm thankful for the safety lessons we got in my high school science classes. I pull the pin and aim the nozzle and then squeeze. I get it into the bear's eyes. It roars in either pain or anger. I'm not really an expert in polar bears.

"Can you handle it?" Rebecca asks me after she sticks her nails into the bear, putting poison into it's system, "That may not keep it down long."

"Yeah. Why?" I reply, moving away from the bear. I know I'll have to lure it into one of the cages somehow. I glance around, but Bucky and the wolf have disappeared.

"I'm going after my brother," she says, "He needs to learn his lesson." He starts to run back towards the exit, but I see a lockdown button on the wall a few feet away and I get to my destination first and lock the prison block down.

"I'm glad you're so observant," she tells me, then approaches her brother. He looks genuinely scared.

"Let's not be harsh," he backs away, "You wouldn't hurt your own twin brother, would you?"

"Why shouldn't I when you were more than willing to hurt me?" Rebecca growls, "Telling these bastards to do more tests."

"It was for the science!"

"No, it was because you're sad that you're ordinary and I'm gifted," she says, "Plus, I got out. I have a good family. I even met our father."

"They said our parents were dead," Jefferson says, "That there was no one to go to. That SHIELD would lock me up."

"You believe these liars?" she laughs, "Yes, our mother is dead. But our father isn't. SHIELD is good. My adoptive parents were SHIELD agents." She steps towards him and he steps back. The idiot is headed right toward one of the empty cells. I find the control panels and check the number over the cell. I hover my hand over the button, ready to press it as soon as he's in the cell.

"They're all I know," he says, "I belong here."

"Wow, they really have you wrapped around their fingers. What did you and your pals do to my friend? Why do you want her kid so badly?" Rebecca sticks out her fingers and the tips are bubbling with poison. He has no choice but to answer her questions.

"Duh. The combined DNA of the three successful super soldiers. When Gabrielle has her child and Jessica and Bucky have their second child, they need to have a kid. The powers would have no equal."

"You've been playing house with people that don't exist yet."

"Gabrielle and Steve had to meet," he spills, "The Jessica was never supposed to go back. We couldn't get them separated. So an agent of ours in SHIELD had to 'accidently' set off the time machine and send them both back. We knew about the Winter Soldier and who he was. We had a few moles in Hydra too. It just worked out that the Winter Soldier ran into Gabrielle's friend and fell in love with her. But she's ordinary."

"That makes me feel so much better," I growl, "You didn't actually want to manipulate my life, just that of my best friend. I was just collateral."

"Well, by the time the Winter Soldier was captured by Hydra the first time, they knew and we knew that there was no point in trying to make another female soldier. He'd never fall for her."

"Why didn't you alter me?" I ask.

"Well, we never had a chance. You were never alone until you were back in Brooklyn, but you were pregnant by then."

"So you're moral enough to not do your experiments on a pregnant woman, but immoral enough to threaten her son? To take in stray kids from the streets and experiment on them until they die or become weak or mentally insane?" Rebecca took one last step towards her brother. He backs up again. Right into the cell. I slam my hand down on the button and the plexiglass front comes down, trapping him in.

"We did -" I feel teeth sink into my leg and then hear an awful sound. Red dots fill my vision my leg gives out and I fall to the floor to see the polar bear moving towards me to finish its job. How could I have been so stupid to take my eyes off it?


	19. Chapter 19

**Hi guys! Today is my birthday, so I'm posting the final chapter and epilogue of the story. You will have the sequel in a few days, so you may want to follow me. Anyways, I hope you enjoy the conclusion of my story!**

 **Shoutout: My mom and my bestie**

 **Warnings: Violence, a little gore, and sadness**

 **Disclaimer: *Sigh***

I can't hear myself scream, but apparently both of my companions do. Bucky comes running over towards me. There is blood on him, and I hope it isn't his. Rebecca sticks her fingers into the bear before Bucky gets to me.

"Do-Don't kill it!" I stutter, forcing myself to stay awake, "He's just a kid."

"Fine," Rebecca pulls her fingers away from the bear but it stumbles back. Bucky angrily attacks it and they end up in one of the cages. Rebecca tosses him the empty fire extinguisher and he hits it on the head, hard, until it passes out. Then he rushes to my side as Rebecca hits the button to seal it in.

"You're bleeding," I reach my fingers out to touch him.

"It got a couple bites in," he says, "It's not down yet, though. I figured you didn't want me to shoot it. The girl is so young."

"Umm, Bucky? Incoming," Rebecca points to the wolf, which is walking towards us, despite a slight limp.

"Can you take care of it?" Bucky asks her. She nods and gets up.

"It hurts," I whimper.

"I know," he takes my hand, then talks into his com, "Guys, we found the prison block. Jess's down. But we're good here now. Do we still have Banner?"

"Yeah," the doctor's voice sounds, "Nat and I just found a lab. We took down the scientists before they could call for backup. We'll be right there. How bad is it?"

"I think her leg is broken," he says, "She got bitten by a polar bear."

"Did you just say polar bear?" Stark's voice came through the system, "Can't wait to hear this story. But Rhodey and I are taking down some lab rats."

"Don't hurt the kids too much," Barton says, "Maybe we can help them."

"Well, you can bring any prisoners to us," Bucky says, "Once you're done. The cells are pretty solid. I think this is where they kept them."

"I'm on my way," Banner says, "See if there is a first aid kit in your area. I found one, but we may need another. Is Rebecca around? Have her do it if she can. Also, try to find some wood." There was a giggle in the intercom. No doubt it is Stark.

"Is anyone else hurt?" I hear Cap's voice.

"My hand might be broken," I hear Wanda's Russian accent.

"I told you we should have been partners," another Russian accent came through, "I could have actually protected you."

"I don't need any protection," Wanda growled.

"She was quite impressive," Vision says.

"Can we save the war stories until we're back on the jet?" Nat's asks, "There's more important things to do right now. Does anyone need backup?"

"No, Stick with Banner," Cap says.

I look to my left to see Rebecca in a wrestling match with the wolf. They are rolling around on the floor. The wolf seems smart enough to avoid her fingers and Rebecca is fast enough to avoid its mouth. Well, almost fast enough. Its teeth sink into her shoulder.

"That's it, you're going down, you mangy fleabag," she snarls. I look around for anything that will help her.

"Bucky," I say. He looks at me and then follows my gaze to a rope on the opposite wall.

"I'll be right back," he rushes off to get it and then comes back in record time. He and Rebecca pin down the wolf, first tying its mouth closed and then immobilizing it. They lift it up and put it in a cell. They exit the cell and Bucky kneels at my side again as Rebecca hits a button, trapping the wolf in the cage.

"We did it," Rebecca says, but it lacks enthusiasm. Her shoulder is bleeding from the chunk of flesh the wolf removed from it. The door opens and Banner and Natasha walk into the room and right over to us.

"I appreciate your concern, Bucky, but you need to move," Banner says, "Maybe you can go find some wood." I already know that there is no way anyone could get Bucky to leave my side.

"The hell I will," he growls. He hands up and moves to my other side and laces his fingers into mine. I'm glad that he's beside me. I watch as Banner takes Bucky's old spot opens up a larger than normal first aid kit. It's like the one in the lab we work in. He pulls out some scissors and cuts away the fabric of my pant leg so he can get a better look at the injury. I almost throw up when I see it. I can see the white of my bone and there is blood everywhere.

"I need to make a tourniquet," Banner says, "I need a belt."

"I've got mine. I can take the gun holster off," Natasha reappeared with some solid looking planks of wood.

"Great, thanks," Banner says. She works quickly. I force myself to focus on Bucky as I feel Banner tighten it around my leg.

"It's gonna be okay," Bucky stroked my hair with his fake arm, "Just focus on me. You always say how much you like my eyes. Just look into them." I nod and lock eyes with him. When I was a teenaged girl, I was a sucker for any guy with dark hair and blue eyes. Just like Magnus Bane. If he was real, I feel like we'd get along very well. We have the same taste in men. Plus, I feel like Alec would be a good friend.

"What are you thinking about?" he asks me.

"Magnus Bane," I reply.

"Should I be jealous?" he teases me, "If you're thinking of him so much."

"I'd pick you over a freewheeling bisexual warlock any day," I smile, "Besides, I like you. You're so handsome. I don't know how I got so lucky." Normally I wouldn't be getting sentimental with other people right by, but I have to focus or my eyes will drift back to my leg. It would be embarrassing if I got sick on myself.

"Hey, I'm the lucky one, not you," he smiles, "You never gave up on me. And you put up with the aftermath of the Winter Soldier. I know it must not have been easy."

"I hate to interupt, but I have to reset the bone. You might want something to put in your mouth to bite down on. This is going to hurt," Banner says. Someone passes me a cloth that I stick in my mouth.

"You may want to switch hands, Barnes," Nat say, "I think the other one is stronger."

"Right," his real hand pulls from mine and is replaced by the metal one, "Eyes on me, Jess. Okay?" I nod and focus on his face. I'm not expecting it when Banner resets my leg. I'm sure my scream would have been a lot louder. My mind wants to blackout, but I blink away the dark spots. I don't want to worry them. They have enough to worry about right now. Wood is placed against both sides of my leg and it is bandaged.

"You're going to need to carry her, Bucky," Banner says, "Make sure her leg doesn't move. Nat, tell the team to meet back up in here ASAP."

"Right," she says, then talks into her comm to pass along the message. Then she calls in SHIELD, which has been partially reformed, but will never be as big as it used to be.

"SHIELD is coming," she says as Banner switches to looking at his daughter's shoulder.

"Well, we need to get Jess and anyone else who is injured to the nearest hospital. We can worry about the details later." The door closest to his opens up.

"Dr. Banner," Vision's soothing voice says, "Would you mind looking at Wanda's hand?" He comes into my field of vision, Wanda right behind him. He has a child, no older than 5 in his arms. I feel bad as I watch him seal the kid into a cell.

"Sure," he says, "You guys do realize that even though I have some medical training, I'm not an MD, right?"

"Well, you know more about it than anyone else on the team," Wanda approaches him, her hand outstretched. He feels it with his own hand and then wraps it up in ace bandages.

"Make that three people that need a real doctor," he says, "It might be broken."

"Four," Pietro and Clint enter the room, "Your archer got burned by one of those soldiers."

"It's not that bad," he says, "I'm fine. It's not like my leg is broken." Nat drifts over to her best friend's side.

"Let me see," she says in almost a motherly way. He holds out his arm and flips it over. I can't see from where I am.

"Not that bad?" Nat asks, "Your arm looks like it was toasted like a marshmallow."

"Not a good reference when all I smell is burnt skin," he says, "It doesn't hurt much. We've had worse."

"You need a doctor. What's Laura gonna say?" Nat scolds him.

"When did Widow become your mother?" Tony walks in hearing the end of their conversation. He deposits two kids into side by side cells and Rebecca seals the cells.

"27 and 28," Rhodey calls, "Close them."

"Is everyone okay?" Cap walks in, "We found a couple young ones." I see Falcon first, who has a child around Toby's age in his arms and another one who I'm guessing is around 3 walking beside him. Then I see Cap cradling a baby in his arms.

"I think young is an understatement," Banner says, "I hope we can find their 's hope they haven't done anything to these kids yet."

"Gemini had Jefferson and I as babies," Rebecca reminds us, "They adopted us. Took good care of us. They didn't start working on us until we could talk."

"Hi, I'm Rebecca," she kneels in front of the three year old Falcon has, "My friends and I are here to help you. Can you tell me your name, sweetie?"

"Jacob," he says, "Are you gonna take us away?"

"Yes, we are. We'll find you a good Mommy and Daddy to take care of you," she smiles, "You're safe. Now, can you tell me the name of your friends?"

"The guy with the wings has Melody," Jacob says, "The baby is Rosie."

"Thank you for being brave, Jacob," she smiles, "It's a lot of help." Jacob doesn't say anything further. I'm sure the poor kid doesn't know what to make of all this.

It's not long before SHIELD arrives where we are and then we head back to Tony's jet to go back to New York. Bucky lifts me up and carries me very carefully onto the jet and then back off it when we get back.

"Great. Another hospital," I sigh as we arrive at SHIELD's infirmary. All of us need looking after, and there is no reasonable explanation for the injuries we have nor a reason we have three strange kids.

"I know, I'm sorry, Love," he says, "It'll be okay. No one is that badly hurt and we just saved three kids."

"Someone in SHIELD will have to take Jacob," I say, "After all he's been through. And if Rebecca's right, they've already experimented on him."

"Well, I think we know one of the kids has a home." I turn my head. The infirmary doesn't have any walls or anything between the beds right now. I see Natasha across the room with the baby - Rosie - in her arms.

"I never thought she'd be the mother type," I say, "Then again, I never thought of myself as the mother type. I think she and Banner said that they were retiring after we finished with Gemini."

"See? They can raise her perfectly fine," Bucky says, "It's not like they'll be able to find any of the kids' parents. Not that the real parents would want them if Gemini adopted them."

"True," I say, "If they adopted them."

A doctor approaches my bed. At least I hope he's a doctor. He is wearing a white lab coat and sets down a clipboard.

"Hello. I'm Dr. Jackson. I'm going to be looking after you. It looks like someone on your team has some pretty good first aid training. I'm going to have you taken up for X-Rays and then possibly surgery," he says, "What caused the injury?"

"An evil polar bear bit me," I say like it makes all the sense in the world.

"Oh?" he raises an eyebrow, "Have they given you any pain meds yet?" He probably thinks I'm crazy or something.

"Nope," I say, "I could use some. I'm in quite a bit of pain. It doesn't hurt a bad as having a baby, but it does hurt quite a bit." He goes off to get some pain meds, I'm assuming, and I look around the room. Clint's on the bed next to mine, still insisting that he's fine, just now to the doctor. Wanda got up from her bed and followed a doctor elsewhere. I'm guessing she is getting her hand X-Rayed. Rebecca's shoulder is getting stitched up in a bed adjacent to mine. The door opens and Gabi walks into the room. Gabi goes straight to Steve, who is down by Natasha, holding Melody.

"Thank goodness you're okay," I hear her say, "I was so worried about all of you." The door opens again and this time Pepper walks in and I smile.

"Mama! Dada!" A familiar voice yells and Pepper walks past Tony, who whines, straight to us.

"Hi buddy!" Bucky smiles, taking our son into his arms, "Daddy missed you so much, Toby." I reach out and ruffled Toby's blond curls. I feel a lot better having him close by. We're all safe now.

I'm in the hospital for a few more days. Tony insisted on moving Bucky and I into live with the rest of the Avengers. I gave into him just to get him to stop bugging me. So, when I'm released, I'm taken to Stark's and I'm impressed to find our floor all set up perfectly. The bedroom looks exactly the same as my one at the old apartment. The only thing that sucks is that I'm stuck in a wheelchair until further notice. Although, I'd rather be wheelchair bound than stuck in bed until I heal.

"Miss Arnold, everyone is gathering in the livingroom," FRIDAY says, "They are requesting your presence as well."

"Okay, thank you, FRIDAY," I say, wheeling over to the elevator. The doors shut behind me and I descend until I reach the correct floor. I wheel down the hall and join my companions. I wheel my chair over to where Bucky is. He sets Toby on my lap and I smile.

"So, what's going on?" I ask, looking around. I notice our group has grown. Rosie is asleep in Banner's arms. Rebecca and a man, who I presume is Noah, are on one couch. Jacob is on Rebecca's lap and Melody is on Noah's.

"Story time," Tony says, "We voted that you can go first because yours is the only one involving evil polar bears."

"Are we sure we should be doing this around the kids?" Banner asks. He sounds surprisingly like a father, despite the short amount of time he's actually been one.

"They won't remember anything," Clint says, "Mine never have. And I've had some pretty awful stories. I usually tell Laura everything."

"Alright," I say, "Well, we found the cell block." I dive into my story, only mentioning Rebecca talking to her brother so she could tell the story herself. It wasn't my story to tell the others.

"I'll go next," Rebecca says, "So, the experimenting never worked on my brother. He was ordinary for some reason. Maybe because of our mother. So, he's a scientist." She told all background on her brother than how we trapped him.

"So where was Barnes during this?" Nat asks.

"Fighting off the wolf girl," Bucky says, "I attacked her right away. I knew better than to hurt her. That Lily girl is about 13. I didn't want to kill her, so I didn't use my gun. I got a few knife wounds into her. She was definitely trained well. When I heard Jess scream, I ran over after what I thought would take her down, but as Rebecca says, it didn't keep her down."

"I want to hear Barton's story next," Nat says, "That's a pretty nasty burn."

"Well, fast boy over there and I fought off a dozen of them," he says, "We were doing pretty well. We didn't know what most of them could do because before they could attack us, he threw them off and I shot them. We thought we were done, but then one of them made Pietro's powers stop working. Then the fire one appeared out of nowhere. He was really bright. I put my arm up to shield my eyes. Which was a mistake. I got burned right away. Then I put an arrow through him once I realized what had happened."

"You mean once you stopped screaming like a girl," Pietro laughs, "The guy that stopped my power got what was coming to him. I don't need to be fast to beat the crap out of him. He won't be reproducing if you catch my drift. Now little sister, how did you break your hand?"

"There was a teleporter," she says, "We had already taken down a girl with water powers and one that had powers over plastic. They weren't easy to beat. Then this guy appears. He kept moving away too fast for my magic to work. I tried to punch him and hit a wall. That made me angry."

"You should have seen it," Vision says, "The whole room glowed with magic. She made him try to scratch his own brain out. It was rather impressive." He smiles at her and Pietro made a fake gagging noise. Wanda glared at him.

"We found a bunch of labs is all," Cap says, "It was a little disappointing. Although we did knock down all the scientists and a couple guards. Then we found the little kids."

"Although Cap took down this one guy who could make multiple copies of himself. The dude was everywhere. Kinda like your whole thing with Loki, from the stories I've heard," Sam says.

"We didn't find any of the enhanced. Just a lab. I looked at some of their stuff before I had to go play doctor," Banner says.

"He saved my life," I say.

"All I did was make a tourniquet to stop the blood, set the bone, and made a makeshift cast. They teach that kind of stuff to boy scouts."

"I don't think anyone else would have been able to do it," Bucky says. Banner shrugs. He's a very modest person. He's the complete opposite of Stark.

"My turn," Stark says, "Rhodey and I found these two huge guys. Like hulk sized. Not quite as strong though. We took them down, but the armour is a little worse for wear. Although the one guy had Rhodey is a bear hug. Like they were wrestling or something. No way he would have gotten out himself. I had to save his life."

"I could have handled it, Stark," Rhodey retorts, "You make me sound like a damsel in distress. You're the one that got thrown straight through four walls." We laugh, which makes Stark a little mad.

"It wasn't four walls. It was two. Did I mention these guys were hulk sized?"

"He's exaggerating. They were smaller than the hulk. Way smaller," Rhodey says. Tony starts pouting and insisting that they were hulk sized, but we all had stopped listening.


	20. Epilogue

**Hey guys! He's the final chapter. In case you missed it, I posted 19 right before this one. This chapter is a little shorter. Thak you to anyone who has read, followed, or favorited this story. Thank you so much. I'll keep writing.**

 **Shoutout: Anyone reading this**

 **Warnings: Cuteness!**

 **Disclaimer: Really?**

 **One Year Later**

I take a deep breath and open my eyes. I look in the mirror one more time. My hair had been done up that morning and I barely recognized myself. I twirl a little in my wedding gown. It's a simple long white dress with a full ruffled skirt. I didn't want anything over the top.

"You look beautiful," Banner says, "Are you ready to go?"

"I-I think so," I say. I had asked him to walk me down the aisle. In the past year, he'd become like a father figure to me. He had been surprised but had agreed to do so.

"Then let's go get in line," he says, holding out his arm. I take it, definitely needing it. I'm wearing flats. I had tried heels, but I was already the same height as Bucky and I couldn't walk in heels to save my life.

We go stand in the procession line behind Clint and Natasha. In front of them are Vision and Wanda and in front of them are Gabi and Steve, before them Rebecca and Noah, who are right behind Melody and Toby, who respectively are flower girl and ring bearer. The music starts and the two two year olds, who have been thoroughly instructed, head down the aisle. I can't see what's going on, which is probably a good thing, because if I saw Bucky I probably would forget the formalities and rush down the aisle.

Soon Clint and Natasha make their way down to the end of the aisle and go off to their respective sides. I look over and see Bucky standing at the end of the aisle, smiling widely. I smile back at him. He is wearing the same thing he was when I first met him - his old tan military attire. He even is wearing the cute little hat. The bride song comes on and everyone stands. Banner and I start walking slowly down towards Bucky. I grip Banner's arm tightly. I know I have to stay in step with the music. Why was this aisle so long?

When we get to the end, Banner hands me over to Bucky and moves to sit down next to Laura and the kids. He sets Rosie on his lap. I look into Bucky's eyes and smile.

"You look beautiful," he whispers as the ceremony starts. Tony had insisted on officiating it. We gave in, but told him that absolutely no nonsense was allowed. It had to be proper. He got ordained online.

"Well, after waiting such a long time, I think we are all happy to see these two finally get married and start their life together," Tony says, "I'm so happy they agreed to let me do the honors."

Tony put his own spin on the wedding, but he kept true to his word. It was a very romantic ceremony.

"I understand that you wrote your own vows?" Tony says, "Would you like to start James?" Bucky knew better than to glare at him and let it slip.

"Jessica, when we first met, I knew you were the one for me. You weren't like other girls I've met. You didn't throw yourself at me. In fact, you wanted nothing to do with me. But with time, that changed. And I was so glad when you agreed to be mine. Then, after the accident, I never stopped thinking about you, but I never thought I'd see you again. Then I run into you in the last place I expected to. In this amazing city. I was so happy to find out we had a little boy and that you still loved me. I know it hasn't been easy, but you are the bravest, kindest, smartest woman that I have ever met and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you." I am crying by the end of his speech. I'm glad I had waterproof makeup on.

"James Buchanan Barnes, how do you expect me to top that?" I ask him, "I never thought I'd ever find someone like you. I never thought I'd be the type of person to fall head over heels in love. Sure, at first I thought you were like all the other guys out there. I could not have been more wrong about you. I'm glad you never gave up on coming after me. When you had your accident, they told me you were dead. I thought I'd never see you again. I had found my soulmate and then lost him. Then I found out that I had a little piece of you. And he's standing right there. Tobias. He changed my life so much and so have you. I couldn't believe it when you asked me to marry you. You're so perfect and I have so many flaws. You always encourage me to be myself and never give up. You're a wonderful husband and a wonderful father. Our life is like a book that I can't wait to keep reading."

"Can the really cute ring bearer give his uncle Steve the rings now?" Tony says. Steve unties the two rings from the pillow. I went to Tony to design Bucky's because of his fake hand was his ring hand and I didn't want to break tradition.

Bucky repeats after Tony and slides the ring down my finger. I smile at the new feeling on my ring finger. I love it. Then I repeat the same words and slip Bucky's onto his hand.

"Does anyone have a reason why these two shouldn't get married? Because if you do, you're probably wrong. So don't say anything. Or do. Or don't and forever hold your peace." Of course no one says anything.

"James Buchanan Barnes, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?"

"I do," Bucky says confidently.

"And do you, Jessica Marie Arnold, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband? To have and to hold in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?"

"I do," I say a little too enthusiastically smiling.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. Mr. and Mrs. James Barnes," Tony says, "You know what you need to do." Bucky leans in and kisses me. I happily kiss him back as everyone cheers for us. Bucky pulls away and lifts up Toby and kisses his head. I take him hand and we head back down the aisle and stand outside to receive a long line of congratulations. I steal Bucky's hat and put it on my head, despite the fact that my hair is done up all nicely. Luckily for him he doesn't have hat hair.

"I'm so happy for you two," Gabi and Steve walk up to us. Their three month old son, James, is fast asleep in Gabi's arms now.

"Thank you," I smile, "How is mini Cap?" That was what Tony had nicknamed him and it had stuck.

"He's fine. He slept through the whole thing, according to Pepper," Steve says, "I wish you would stop calling him that, though."

"Well, Little Soldier was taken," I say, bouncing my two year old son, "Besides, it suits him."

"Well, you have other people to talk to an I think we're supposed to talk to people too," Gabi says. They join our line. As Nat and Banner reach us. Rosie is giggling about something, but I'm not sure what.

"Is little Toby ready to come spend some time with Aunt Nat and Uncle Bruce when Mommy and Daddy head to Italy and hopefully do some sightseeing there?" Nat smiles. She became a great mother really quickly and they had volunteered to watch him. We knew it wasn't a good idea to leave him with Gabi and Steve, given that James was still so little.

The reception is at Stark tower. Tony hired a professional party planner for us so that we didn't have to worry about a lot of details so we could just focus on planning the actual wedding. I'm not really sure what to expect when I step into the floor the party is on, but the room is extravagant. The wedding colors, silver and purple are all over the place. There are a few ice sculptures in the room. The dance floor is huge and I can't think of the DJ's name, but I know he is a famous one. We're escorted to our places at the head table and we sit down as the room starts to fill with people.

Dinner is amazing. The food was some of the best I've ever tasted. The buffet features all of my and Bucky's favorite foods. I have to force myself not to eat too much food. I don't want to get sick on my wedding day. Tony would never let that go. He still is teasing Steve about the whole 'language' thing.

Steve gives a toast, telling about how Bucky has always been there for him since they were kids and how happy he is. Then he gets into funny stories about young Bucky that make my husband bury his face into his hands. I laugh along with everyone.

Our first dance is to 'You'll be in my Heart' from _Tarzan_. I have always loved that movie and that song. I had suggested the song to Bucky, who had informed me that he had never seen the movie. We ended up having a Disney movie marathon snuggled up on the couch with Toby. Bucky quickly agreed to the song. We had put a few other songs on the list for Tony to give to the DJ.

People flood to the dance floor after my first dance with Bucky. I could have danced all night, but we have other wedding cliches to do and then we have to go off to Italy.

Even the cake has silver and purple frosting. On the top are bride and groom figures that look exactly like me and Bucky. I wonder how Stark managed that. The cake is ridiculously tall at five tiers. We cut into the cake and then shove the red velvet - my favorite kind - into each other's faces. I may have purposely gotten a lot of frosting on Bucky. He kissed me and made both of us even more messy. Yep, another wedding cliche, but who cares? I've always wanted a big fancy wedding. When my mom got remarried I was surprised she didn't do a lot of the cliches and that there weren't a ton of people in attendance.

After cake, I stood at my spot and turned around and threw the flowers into the crowd of unmarried woman. Then I turned around to find my bouquet in Wanda's arms and I smile when I see the look on her brother's face. Sooner or later he is going to have to stop playing the role of the overprotective older brother. I notice someone missing from the crowd.

"Rebecca," I walk over to her, "Not a fan of cliches?"

"No. I'm not," she smiles, "I'd rather leave it to the single women." She flashes her left hand at me for a second.

"Congratulations," I smile, "How are all those former Gemini kids doing?" Rebecca and Noah along with a few others at SHIELD had taken to caring for the kids that we rescued. A few of them had been returned to family members after they were deemed stable by SHIELD psychiatrists. Many of them didn't have any family to go to, so SHIELD gave them a building where they had rooms and also had schooling and one on one attention. They even recruited a few actual teachers, but they kept the kids who were still unstable away from the civilian teachers.

"Most of them are good. Our polar bear and wolf friends are doing a little better, but they're still getting mostly one on one."

"Have you seen your brother?" I ask her. He had been arrested, but had been put into a psych ward.

"Yeah, he says he's sorry," she says, "I'm not sure I'm ready to forgive him yet though. I'm working on it. It's just really hard after everything."

"You have earned the right to do that," I say, "He put you through a lot."

"Yeah," she says, "Twins are supposed to have a special bond. I guess they took that away. I just hope we can get it back."

"You will, just give it time," I say, "And don't worry, I won't tell anyone your news. I should probably go talk to my other guests, though.

I spend a lot of time socializing. People start to head home as it gets later. We see them off and tell them that we're glad they came.

"Ready to head out?" Tony approaches us, "Jet's all ready to go. Just make sure you leave the hotel room."

"Tony!" Pepper glares at him as Bucky and I both turn red.

"Just let us go say goodbye to Toby," I say. I pull my husband over to where Banner and Natasha have him. I pull him into my arms.

"Toby, Mommy and Daddy are leaving now. Be good for Aunt Natasha and Uncle Bruce. You listen to them, okay? And play nicely with Rosie. Mommy is going to miss you so much."

"Love Mommy," Toby says, "Miss Mommy."

"I love you too," I smile. I kiss his head and pass him to Bucky to have him say goodbye.

"Daddy will miss you too," Bucky says, "I love you, Little Soldier."

"Love Daddy."

We painfully finally leave Toby and get onto Tony's jet, which has a bed and a bathroom on it. I change out of my wedding dress into comfy clothes.

"So, Mrs. Barnes, are you happy now?" Bucky asks me, putting his arms around me from behind and then he kisses my neck.

"I definitely am," I tell him honestly.

"Good. You deserve it more than anyone," He says. I turn around in his arms so that we're face to face.

"We both deserve it. I can't wait to see what our new life brings us," I smile.

"Me neither," he says, "Gemini and HYDRA are gone. SHIELD is completely reformed. All we have to worry about us and Toby."

"And any future kids of ours," I remind him, "I don't want a huge family, but I definitely want more than just Toby."

"Yeah me too," he smiles, "What could possibly go wrong?"


	21. Author's Note

**Hey guys! I'm just writing this to let you know that I have posted the first 'chapter' of the sequel. It is called Little Moments. It is a series of one shots takes place after Gemini's defeat. The first one is Jess and Bucky. The ships are Jess/Bucky, Gabi/Steve, Nat/Banner, Laura/Clint, Jane/Thor, and Pepper/Tony. I will be taking suggestions for one - shots. Anyways, I hope if you enjoyed this story and check out the sequel**

 **-The Other Avenger**


End file.
